(no subject)
so today was the first day of my first ever like real grown-up job. let me say this, who anyone and everyone who is still in school, stay there for as long as you possibly can. it wasnt a particularly awful day. it was just... a day. all of these people i work with get up at dawn everyday, march into the workplace, toil for hours on end crunching numbers, inputing data, and whatever else it is they do, then they march on out at sunset.
i tried my best to stay positive, and do exactly as i was told, an dpay attention and what not, and i caught on rather quickly. all in all it wasnt that terrible of a first day at any job, the people were nice, time didnt drag too much, and i didnt fall behind terribly.
on my way home it really hit me. this doesnt fucking matter. i could do something like this for the rest of my life, make a decent amount of money, and have a nice little predictable life. while predictability has always been something that ive been found of, i just cant settle for this. i dont want to cure cancer, or invent the longer burning light bulb. i dont need to change the world. i just want to do something that matters. something that i can be proud of while im doing it and when its over, and honestly, selling, ordering, or overseeing some product is not going to be it, and will never be it.
i know, stop whining.
i tried my best to stay positive, and do exactly as i was told, an dpay attention and what not, and i caught on rather quickly. all in all it wasnt that terrible of a first day at any job, the people were nice, time didnt drag too much, and i didnt fall behind terribly.
on my way home it really hit me. this doesnt fucking matter. i could do something like this for the rest of my life, make a decent amount of money, and have a nice little predictable life. while predictability has always been something that ive been found of, i just cant settle for this. i dont want to cure cancer, or invent the longer burning light bulb. i dont need to change the world. i just want to do something that matters. something that i can be proud of while im doing it and when its over, and honestly, selling, ordering, or overseeing some product is not going to be it, and will never be it.
i know, stop whining.