Inner War
It tells you you don't matter.
It tells you you don't make a difference.
Your effort is wasted. Your affections unwelcome.
It tells you that you don't really have anyone who loves you.
It tells you that you never make any meaningful connections.
It tells you that no one is truly interested.
It tells you you're untouchable.
Unlovable.
It tells you that your life amounts to nothing for anyone but yourself.
If you listen long enough it ventures into greater, more damaging detail. Whispering discouragements that want to make you stop trying to do anything at all.
It makes you private. It makes you shy. It makes you pensive... and distrustful with it's many reasons for being disappointed in people.
It's the weight that crushes you when you know your present company will not take the steps to insure they get a little of your time beyond this moment. ...the saying good bye without knowing when you'll see each other again is a playground for the voice that tells you people don't care if or when they see you again.
It tells you you're a downer. You're naive. You're irrelevant. You're inexperienced. You don't fit in. You don't belong. Your opinion doesn't matter. You're odd. And not in an interesting way.
You're too sad all the time.
You're too much work. You're too intense. Too needy. Too open. Too closed. Too vague. Too willing. Too perplexing.
That's why people don't like you. That's why people don't include you. That's why people don't call. That's why people don't make plans.
These are the carefully crafted attacks it makes; the words it says.
And it keeps talking... because it loves a captive audience.
Reminders that you're alone. Whether alone or with someone. Whether it's one, or a group. Whether it's friends or family. And the conditions are perfect if you have no family, and only distant friends. It can take root and grow, and thrive and tell you countless lies about your worth.
If you listen long enough.
The weight can seem like it's impossible to bare. But you keep carrying it.
Why can't you drop it and run? Get as far away as you possibly can.
Because no where can you go where you will find someone, some thing that can make you forget it's there.
Joy comes from within. Happiness is a choice. But every door you walk through with happiness and joy marked clearly there-upon opens up to a new room with perfect acoustics for that ever-hindering voice.
And like a homing beacon; like lighting flares to show it the way... that mighty weight will find you and heap itself in all its merciless burden, right back where it began it's journey: on your shoulders... in your mind... in your being.
Listen all you want. It's free; you're not.
Stop listening. Don't give it a venue. Don't give it an ear. Don't let it spread. Don't let it grow any further. Don't let it win.
The weight has made you stronger than you know.
The burden has made you compassionate.
The pain has made you grateful for the relief found in little things.
The loneliness has made your heart a huge vessel, brimming with the desire to love.
Don't give up.
It tells you you don't make a difference.
Your effort is wasted. Your affections unwelcome.
It tells you that you don't really have anyone who loves you.
It tells you that you never make any meaningful connections.
It tells you that no one is truly interested.
It tells you you're untouchable.
Unlovable.
It tells you that your life amounts to nothing for anyone but yourself.
If you listen long enough it ventures into greater, more damaging detail. Whispering discouragements that want to make you stop trying to do anything at all.
It makes you private. It makes you shy. It makes you pensive... and distrustful with it's many reasons for being disappointed in people.
It's the weight that crushes you when you know your present company will not take the steps to insure they get a little of your time beyond this moment. ...the saying good bye without knowing when you'll see each other again is a playground for the voice that tells you people don't care if or when they see you again.
It tells you you're a downer. You're naive. You're irrelevant. You're inexperienced. You don't fit in. You don't belong. Your opinion doesn't matter. You're odd. And not in an interesting way.
You're too sad all the time.
You're too much work. You're too intense. Too needy. Too open. Too closed. Too vague. Too willing. Too perplexing.
That's why people don't like you. That's why people don't include you. That's why people don't call. That's why people don't make plans.
These are the carefully crafted attacks it makes; the words it says.
And it keeps talking... because it loves a captive audience.
Reminders that you're alone. Whether alone or with someone. Whether it's one, or a group. Whether it's friends or family. And the conditions are perfect if you have no family, and only distant friends. It can take root and grow, and thrive and tell you countless lies about your worth.
If you listen long enough.
The weight can seem like it's impossible to bare. But you keep carrying it.
Why can't you drop it and run? Get as far away as you possibly can.
Because no where can you go where you will find someone, some thing that can make you forget it's there.
Joy comes from within. Happiness is a choice. But every door you walk through with happiness and joy marked clearly there-upon opens up to a new room with perfect acoustics for that ever-hindering voice.
And like a homing beacon; like lighting flares to show it the way... that mighty weight will find you and heap itself in all its merciless burden, right back where it began it's journey: on your shoulders... in your mind... in your being.
Listen all you want. It's free; you're not.
Stop listening. Don't give it a venue. Don't give it an ear. Don't let it spread. Don't let it grow any further. Don't let it win.
The weight has made you stronger than you know.
The burden has made you compassionate.
The pain has made you grateful for the relief found in little things.
The loneliness has made your heart a huge vessel, brimming with the desire to love.
Don't give up.