(no subject)
For the last two months or so, I've been having dreams where I'm constantly running into these two people that I try to avoid in real life. (Let's call them "Agnes" and "Kristofferson.")
In my dreams, they never quite do anything horrible or awful, but they're always there, and the more I try to evade them, the more they seem to find me and seemingly mock me with their mere presence.
And in a way, that in itself is quite frightening, because I feel like I'm constantly on the edge of crying or becoming violent if they don't leave me alone---which makes me feel even worse because to them I'm the crazy one, I'm the one overreacting, and I'm the unjustified one.
They are not quite nightmares because I don't wake up with a sense of fear or with a scream like I do with my nightmares of 'spiritual presences,' but they always wake me up with a deeply seated agitation and an overwhelming sense of entrapment within my reality.
And the fact that the place I turn to for escape from my everyday life is hibernation doesn't really help things either.
I guess I'll just have to keep reminding myself that I'll be out of this city in three months and exercise more so that I can go straight to deep slumber without any dreams.
In my dreams, they never quite do anything horrible or awful, but they're always there, and the more I try to evade them, the more they seem to find me and seemingly mock me with their mere presence.
And in a way, that in itself is quite frightening, because I feel like I'm constantly on the edge of crying or becoming violent if they don't leave me alone---which makes me feel even worse because to them I'm the crazy one, I'm the one overreacting, and I'm the unjustified one.
They are not quite nightmares because I don't wake up with a sense of fear or with a scream like I do with my nightmares of 'spiritual presences,' but they always wake me up with a deeply seated agitation and an overwhelming sense of entrapment within my reality.
And the fact that the place I turn to for escape from my everyday life is hibernation doesn't really help things either.
I guess I'll just have to keep reminding myself that I'll be out of this city in three months and exercise more so that I can go straight to deep slumber without any dreams.