Not just another mouth in the lipstick vogue

[johnnygoodtimes]

My bro wants a Super Nintendo so I'm on ebay for the first time in over a year and omg:

Comments

[mrs_laugh_track]

YOU WIN! Now you can have Elvis Costello staring at you kind of creepy like from behind a camera in your very own home whenever you want!

[ducttapesnakes]

Elvis is your very own creepy voyeur!

[johnnygoodtimes]

YOU FORGOT THE BEST PART, THAT I PAID WAY MORE MONEY THAN WAS REASONABLE FOR IT! BUT W/E IT'S REALLY AWESOME AND IS GOING IN MY BEDROOM TO WATCH ME WHEN I SLEEP!

[mrs_laugh_track]

I FIGURED I WAS IN NO PLACE TO JUDGE YOUR MONEY MANAGEMENT SKILLS AS I JUST SPENT TOO MUCH ON A SKIRT MADE FROM VINTAGE STAR TREK SHEETS. WHAT I'M SAYING HERE IS THAT IF YOU START A BANK I WILL TOTALLY GO THERE BECAUSE I KNOW THERE WILL BE A CHUNK OF MY MONEY SET ASIDE FOR RIDICULOUS THINGS.

GOOD LUCK WHEN IT COMES TO LIFE. I WATCH A LOT OF MOVIES AND THOSE THINGS ALWAYS COME TO LIFE.

[johnnygoodtimes]

BANK OF JOHNNYGOODTIMES: WE SAVE YOUR MONEY SO YOU CAN SPEND IT ON CRAP. SO GLAD TO HAVE YOUR BUSINESS, SONIA.

ALSO THAT SKIRT SOUNDS TOO AWESOME TO REALLY EXIST

OMFGGG THAT WOULD BE THE BEST THING EVER IF IT CAME TO LIFE! I WOULDN'T EVEN CARE IF IT STRANGLED ME BECAUSE OF IT BEING THE BEST THING EVER!

[mrs_laugh_track]

THAT SKIRT IS TOTALLY REAL AND TOTALLY OWNED BY ME. THANKS BANK OF JOHNNYGOODTIMES.

EVERY YEAR HUNDREDS OF LADIES AND DUDES ARE STRANGLED BY LIVING CARDBOARD CUTOUTS OF PEOPLE THEY ARE BIG FANS OF. NOBODY EVER PRESSES CHARGES.

[johnnygoodtimes]

THAT SKIRT IS FAAABULOUS AND TOO SHORT FOR ME TO EVER WEAR EVER. YOU SHOULD PLAY THAT ZZ TOP SONG ABOUT LEGS WHENEVER YOU WEAR THAT SKIRT, FOR REAL.

LOLOL ILU

[mrs_laugh_track]

MY SECRET TO WEARING SHORT SKIRTS? NOT BEING VERY TALL. BUT MAN, I WILL CRY IF THAT SKIRT DOESN'T FIT. BECAUSE LOOK AT IT! IT IS GLORY.

ALSO, YOU SAY THAT LIKE I DON'T ALREADY ROCK LEG THEMED MUSIC WHENEVER I GO ANYWHERE. YOU SHOULD CLEARLY KNOW BETTER BY NOW.

ILU2 BB