(no subject)
Friends and...friends, I guess, it is most likely going to be a very late night filled with fun useless updates meant for nothing other than to annoyingly clutter up your friends page. Or would, that is. If any large amount of people actually listed me as a friend. I'm not sure if anyone does. I wonder if I should check... Anyhow, on that note, behold:
"Ladies and gentlemen, hold the phones: I have the solution to America's obesity epidemic at my svelte fingertips, and rather than cashing in and selling out in return for endless riches and my very own millionaire pot belly, I'm going to share it with you for free. Listen very carefully.
Stop putting sugar in everything, morons.
It's obvious as soon as you put something in your mouth in America; sugar is in almost everything you eat. There's sugar in bread, for example, which is something almost nowhere else in the world does. What do you put on your bread? Honey roast turkey and ham. And mustard. With sugar in it.
There's sugar in your drinks, there's sugar in your ketchup, there's sugar in your coffee cream and the snacks you chew on between your sugary meals. There's even sugar in your toothpaste, which is definitive proof that you've taken the sweet thing way too far. Forget illegal wars for oil; America has historically fought long, fierce battles over the sweet stuff, for no other reason than you want more of it. You love it.
Thing is, though, it's making you round."
--Owen Goodyear (another goddamm englishman:))
"Ladies and gentlemen, hold the phones: I have the solution to America's obesity epidemic at my svelte fingertips, and rather than cashing in and selling out in return for endless riches and my very own millionaire pot belly, I'm going to share it with you for free. Listen very carefully.
Stop putting sugar in everything, morons.
It's obvious as soon as you put something in your mouth in America; sugar is in almost everything you eat. There's sugar in bread, for example, which is something almost nowhere else in the world does. What do you put on your bread? Honey roast turkey and ham. And mustard. With sugar in it.
There's sugar in your drinks, there's sugar in your ketchup, there's sugar in your coffee cream and the snacks you chew on between your sugary meals. There's even sugar in your toothpaste, which is definitive proof that you've taken the sweet thing way too far. Forget illegal wars for oil; America has historically fought long, fierce battles over the sweet stuff, for no other reason than you want more of it. You love it.
Thing is, though, it's making you round."
--Owen Goodyear (another goddamm englishman:))