ugh
im so aggrivated..im sick of caring.im sick of trying to prove that i care.im sick of people lying to themselves.im sick of all the bullshit that life throws back in my face.im sick of caring so much that it makes me sick.but i refuse to let it get me down.fuck that. i chose to be happy in my fucke dup little world where things never work out right.this pathetic world where so many people are hurting and refuse to let the right people inside the walls they construct due to previous assholes who previously leftscars.i wish i could shut myself off. i wish i could close it all down.shut down the store but i cant dammit.i wish i would have never let my own walls fall down.granted i like helping random people on a daily basis that i have no emotional ties too but,i wish i woul dhave never given in to anything deeper, fooling myself into thinking someone wante dmore of me that i was actually willing to give in to.i keep having to learn this lesson over and over again. i hope it sticks this time.moral of the story.....if you feel butterflies, thats a warning to run like hell...at least thats what everyone else does....fuck it..cold an dbitter is a helluva lot easier than warm and caring