The Death March - completed RP with siryn_song

[john_ispyro]

Title: The Death March
Part: Twelve - The Night Out
Previously: Prologue | One | Two | Three| Four | Five | Six | Seven | Eight | Nine | Ten | Eleven
RP: With siryn_song. Complete.
Note: Many thanks to the awesome Terry!Mun for a lovely RP. :)

Wednesday night...

John stood outside the little sushi restaurant that he and Terry agreed to meet at. He was wearing his usual, jeans and a hoodie, though they were starting to look pretty damn baggy on him. And he was wearing his baseball hat, peak forward, pulled down low on his forehead.

The people passing by on the sidewalk didn't spare him a glance. One guy even stepped on his foot, barely uttering an "opps, sorry" before scurrying away.

John sighed. Maybe going out in a public setting wasn't the best idea for the evening. He should have invited Terry over to the hotel, and they could have gotten delivery or something.

Too late now. He saw Terry walking up to the restaurant. "Hey, Terry!" he called out, waving to her. He noticed that if people knew who he was, and what was happening with him, they weren't repelled by the Death March. He hoped it was the same with her.

There was a second where Terry had to pause and really look at the person who called her name, if only because he barely resembled John. He was so thin. For a moment she almost wished he were someone else, if only because she didn't want to think he'd wasted away to this. But she put on a big smile, a sincere one because she was pleased to see him, waved back to him, and didn't allow herself to think that this might be the last time she sees him.

When they reached each other she slipped her arms around his shoulders in a careful hug, not wanting to hurt him. He looked so breakable.

"So." she said, staring him in the eye, "It really is you."

She felt herself starting to cry and fought it back. She didn't want to cry in front of John, she didn't want to make him uncomfortable. She didn't want to cling to him and scream in joy that he was still here, or scream in agony that he might be gone again soon. She didn't want to ask him about Ste. She didn't know if she wanted to know. If she started to cry, she might do all the other things, so it was best not to cry.

Instead she just kept smiling. "Hungry?"

"Yeah, it's really me," he said, and was glad that she at least believed him. He noticed when she started to get a bit overwhelmed by it, but she was a trooper and just smiled, so he didn't bring it up or anything. He didn't want to make her uncomfortable, and he was still getting used to his part of it.

"A bit hungry," John said, smiling. It was sorta true, he was a little bit hungry, but he knew he wouldn't eat much. He wasn't that good at keeping food down anymore. He'd try, for Terry and sushi, he'd try. "Let's go inside."

They were seated at their table, and he asked her with raised eyebrows. "Same as last time?" he asked, and she nodded. He rattled off an order to the waitress, after Terry got her attention. After she left, John reached into his hoodie and pulled out an envelope, sliding it across the table. He smirked at her. "The donation. And you better take that, or I'll just end up mailing it in. Or giving it to JP. Or giving it to Doug to give to Will and what's he going to do about it, huh?"

Terry rolled her eyes at him, but took the envelope. "You're impossible, you know that? And you have to tell me exactly how you want this money spent, because I want you to be happy with it. You don't have to do it now, of course. But yeah. Thank you," she added softly, not wanting him to think she didn't appreciate it.

She tapped her third finger on the table anxiously, trying to figure out the right conversation starter. She was afraid to ask for specifics regarding his pseudo-deadness, both because she was sure he was tired of talking about it, and she wasn't sure she would understand it if he explained.

When the food came, she found it easier. "You know, I haven't had sushi since the last time we ate it together. I forgot how good it was."

"Yeah, me neither," John said, popping a kappa maki in his mouth. He had noticed the hesitation of earlier, and how she was anxious, and wished he knew what to say.

"Look, it's okay," he finally said. "You can ask me. Whatever you want. Or do you want me to just, I don't know. Talk? We've got to break the ice on this thing somehow."

She smiled sheepishly. "Sorry. You're right. I just, I don't know, I thought you maybe wouldn't want to talk about it. And it is sort of weird. But you already know that. Yeah."

She took a bite, using it to give herself a second to get composed. "Sorry," she said again then took a deep breath, "I want to know what happened to you. I want you to tell me everything you want to tell me. I want to help you, if there's any way that I can."

She still didn't mention Ste. If he wanted to talk about it, he would.

"Yeah, it's weird," John said, nodding in agreement. "Really fucking weird. Like, magic stuff? Supernatural beings and crap? I mean, sure, you hear whispers of things and see the fucking horrible movies but you don't actual think it's real, you know?"

He chewed on a roll before he answers, and shrugged. "You can know everything. That's why I, you know. Decided to tell people what happened. It will all come out someday, I'm sure, isn't it better from me? But, yeah. Toad happened, that's what," John said dryly. "Like I said before, he gave me this curse thing. The Death March. And to be cured, I had to travel across the world to find the ingredients. Like, that's the March part? That's sorta part of it's properties, that I had to do it for myself."

John looked down at his plate for a moment, but then looked back up at Terry. "Except for if one companion came with me to help. Ste came, at first. He was a good guy. Brave. He thought of you, a lot. I'm sorry, Terry. I'm so sorry I kept him from you."

Her damn eyes were watering again and she poked at the Wasabi like that was to blame.

"He wanted to go with you. I'm sure he did, I know how tight you guys were. I'm glad he didn't let you go alone." She clenched her jaw, "So um, so he didn't... he didn't die in the fire then?"

"No, he didn't," John said quietly. JP asked him not to say anything to Terry, but he didn't want to lie to her. He couldn't do it, especially not to her face. She deserved the truth. "A couple weeks later. We were attacked. I couldn't save him."

It was John now, who almost choked on the words. It was really hard for him to talk about. He still hadn't really said much about it, not even to Doug or Jean-Paul.

"And about wanting to go? Maybe, but. Well. I found out that one Freedom Force person has the power of Persuasion." John shook his head. "I think he would have rather been at home with his kids, and with you."

He stared glumly at his plate.

She just blinked at him. "They forced him to go? No, no, he would have wanted to help you but they... what else were they making him do? What else have they been making you do? When did you find out about this?"

Her voice was starting to rise, and she took a breath, clasping her hands together and pressing them to her mouth. A raised voice would only make John uncomfortable, people stare, and possibly break something.

This was something he hadn't told any of his friends about yet. Other then Doug, and JP. That whole big public post thing didn't work out so well, in some respects (though, great in others) so he was tempted to just leave his livejournal alone and not bother with it anymore.

Of course, it was the best to get information out to a bunch of people quickly. Maybe he should have done it before...

No. No, it was good that Terry was finding out from him. Even if her possible high voice blew out his ear drums.

"I found out after.. Ste died... and I had to come back to New York to report to them. I was only here one night," he added on quickly, so she didn't get mad at him for not notifying anyone he was in town. Of course, he was supposed to be dead at the time. "My boss tried to use it on me, like, tell me to continue on my journey alone and forget about telling my friends and to forget he used his power on me." John shrugged. "But I don't think his power can work against this... thing... happening to me, and he probably didn't know. So I played along, and the next thing I did was go and get Doug. That's when he joined me."

John picked up his glass of water, but didn't sip it, just stared at it thoughtfully. "I don't know everything they made me do," he said honestly. "Like, I think back on some things, and events, and I don't feel... anything for it. Like, I was only going through the motions. I did it, but the choice wasn't mine. And then I think back on other stuff, and I just know the choice was mine."

He put the glass back down, a little harder then he should have. "Playing dead and going on this Death March without telling my friends and family? Not my choice."

Terry watched him carefully as he spoke, because that was the one thing that bothered her when she'd read that post. How could he possibly have kept this from them, from Doug? That just wasn't a John thing to do, no matter how dangerous a situation he was in. He had to be telling the truth about this.

And Ste? As far as she was concerned, Freedom Force had murdered him the moment they made him go along. She was sure of that already. She just wasn't sure what she was going to do with that information yet.

"I believe you," she said, and her voice was lower, determined. "There had to be some explanation for this. Well, for you not saying anything. You would never leave Doug like that."

She pushed her forgotten plate to the side so she could reach across the table and take John's hand. "So what do we do now?"

He looked down at their hands; he was pretty surprised with the action. He was so used to people just looking away from him, or avoiding him. And even when he was well, he was so prickly against affection from anyone - except for Doug, of course.

He didn't pull away. He even squeezed her hand.

But he frowned - not at her hand, but at her question. "Do?" he echoed. "I don't think I know what you mean. There's nothing to do."

She fixed him with a stare that would have said 'you're an idiot' if it didn't have such affection in it. "Well two things need to happen now. You need to finish your Death March. No matter what. And whatever one of your Freedom Force people that made us all go through this needs to have his ass kicked. Hard. You just tell me which one I can help with."

Because she wasn't about to lose them both for nothing.

He smiled sadly, and shook his head. "Terry," he said gently, "there isn't anything left to finish. Nowhere for me to go. Nothing for me to find. It's done."

But then he smirked. "Kinney? Oh, yeah. Please, feel free. Just don't listen to him," he advised. "Power of persuasion is probably a pretty difficult thing to get around. Especially if he can do it with his mind," he adds in as an afterthought, but then his mouth dropped. "Wow. Fuck. If he does that, that's really fucking hard to get around.

She considered this. "Well then I'll just scream his ass through a wall from the other room or something. I'll figure out a way."

She paused to take a sip of her water, then shook her head as she put it down. "It's not done. You've got time still. If anyone can figure this out, it's the people we know. Look, if you don't want me to talk like that, fine. I won't. I don't want to upset you, and if you think there's no hope, I won't tell you there is. But you're not stopping me from believing it. I'm not giving up until you are in the ground, understand? I just won't tell you."

She sat back and crossed her arms over her chest like a frustrated child. So there.

"You and JP and Doug make a perfect fucking team," John muttered, but nodded his head in agreement and gave a half-smile. "But, fine. You're more then welcome to do what you want. Have your hopes up. But my own hopes are tired after all this time. So, fine, we won't talk about it, and the three of you can conspire while I'm sleeping. Deal."

He downs the rest of his water, and nodded at the bill. "You did say your treat, right? Well. The movie will be mine." Yes. That was his way of asking if she wanted to hang out more. After all, it's their thing.

She nodded back and took the bill, "Yes, my treat. And you just paid a crapload of money to the Center, I think the least I can do is treat the movie too. You're not allowed to argue. But I'll let you choose which movie because I'm nice like that."

Terry paid the bill and they made their way towards the theater. It all felt so familiar, the sushi, the movie, the company. Last time they did this had been so long ago. Before she'd started seeing Ste, back when John and Doug were still broken up. She shook her head slightly, pushing the thoughts away because it was stupid to dwell on it and try to make sense of it and she didn't want to do so anyway. She was enjoying herself, and instead she decided to focus on that.

Later, they walked out of the movie theatre with a scowl on his face. "Well, that movie crapped," he said. "Sorry I made you pay for that shit." He had tried really hard to pay for something (tickets, concession, anything) but Terry was so adamant about it he let her. Finally, he huffed and said fine, but she had to agree to let him walk her home.

Now, even though his hands were in his pockets, he stuck out his elbow for her to take, which she did, and they began walking down the sidewalk. "It's really too bad Indiana Jones wasn't out yet, that would have been awesome. Although, I do have to say, when it comes to Indie style, Doug and I have even him beat." And JP, he thought in his head, but didn't say anything. Doug and he had always kept JP's involvement in the Prison Break quiet, to protect their friend, and he wasn't about to spill something right now, just in case Terry didn't know.

"JP's right," John said, in a way that probably seemed completely random to Terry. "You're one hell of an amazing woman. Love you," he said quietly, turning his head to drop a quick kiss on the top of hers. "Thanks for tonight." This wasn't a sad night for him, he'd enjoyed himself and he was happy to have had the chance to hang out with her again. Doug had been right - he should spend what was left of his life actually living.

But, he continued on as if he didn't just have a sappy, confession moment. "You know, about Indie, we should totally go this weekend, or maybe next week, with Doug and JP. They're probably sitting at the hotel right now, playing Mario Kart and swearing at the television in French or something."

And as much as he enjoyed his evening, he wasn't stupid; he knew that this whole thing was going to be hard for Terry, even though she seemed to be enjoying herself this evening, and that they had fun. But maybe it would be easier for her if her last memory, or memories, of him were shared ones. Plus, it would be great if they all hung out together.

"Cool with you?"

She smiled at him. "Cool with me. I'd love to."

When they reached her apartment she gave him a hug, much less timid than her first one, and took just a moment too long to let go. "Love you too."

ooc: So, Terry!mun has called dibs on Kinney. :D However, there will be a public post about the Freedom Force stuff, and if anyone else wants in on that, we're more then willing to collaborate. Let either one of us know! On a related note, I will be going on vacation tomorrow to visit my friend, tm_magneto/iamdoom/red_eyed_sin!mun (yay!) so my/John's presence may be scarce/sporatic for the next week. Please feel free to email me or leave a comment, especially those who I have been planning RPs with, because I may get the chance to answer them/start tagging. I'm not sure! Thanks.