Alternate Universe Meme: The return!
I had a late request on Teaspoon from ShyWhovian for a Six and Peri set.
1. Wild West
"I still think you should've dressed as a prospector," Peri said.
"What, with a beard? Like old Yrcanos?" Her travelling companion shook his head decisively. "That isn't me at all."
"It's just you look a bit conspicuous in that gear..."
"Conspicuous? Conspicuous? Conspicuous? My dear Miss Brown, it would be futile to hide my light under a bushel. We shall confront your villainous stepfather with..." He switched to what Peri supposed he thought a Texas accent sounded like. "With Wild Jake Greely, here to clean up the town of New Seville!"
Peri facepalmed. "Don't do that," she said. "Just... don't." 2. Cyberpunk
The green letters raced across the screen.
~WHERE AM I?
The Doctor took a deep breath, and began to type.
~CROZIER UPLOADED YOUR MIND TO THE VALEYARDGROUP MAINFRAME.
~CAN YOU GET ME OUT AGAIN?
There was a pause, during which the Doctor reached for the keyboard several times, and each time drew back.
~I GET IT.
~PERI, I'M SORRY
Before he could complete the sentence, more letters appeared.
~JUST SAY WHAT YOU NEED.
The Doctor squared his shoulders.
~KIV'S PRIVATE KEYSTORE.
Presently, the terminal's external storage unit gave a beep.
~HERE YOU GO.
Another pause.
~BYE DOC. IT'S BEEN FUN. 3. Shapeshifters
The Doctor waded out into the sea, and caught hold of the struggling swimmer as she surfaced for the second time. Carrying her in his arms, he staggered back to the shore, laid her down on a rock, and waited while she coughed up seawater.
"Are you all right, Peri?" he asked, once she seemed back to normal.
She looked up at him. "I guess so. Thanks for saving me."
The Doctor put his hand on her shoulder. "What went wrong?"
Peri wiggled her tail. "Turns out, changing into a mermaid doesn't actually make you any better of a swimmer." 4. Pirates
Peri felt her way through the humid, moonless, starless night, her heart in her mouth. Tonight was her last chance for escape. Tomorrow her stepfather would pack her off back to Boston and an arranged marriage.
By the time she reached the quay, the boat she'd spotted earlier had already cast off. In desperation, she pulled off her dress, swam after the boat, and was hauled aboard by its occupant.
"Are... are you a pirate?" she asked, looking up at the burly blond bosun.
"I?" He raised his eyebrows. "I, young lady, am the very model of a Gallifreyan buccaneer." 5. …In SPACE!!
(An episode tag for Slipback).
"This is the biggest library you can find?" Peri asked, looking dubiously at the tablet computer in her hand.
"Just because it looks small on the outside, doesn't mean there isn't a lot in it. Travelling in the TARDIS, you should know that."
Peri gave the tablet a suspicious prod. It chirped and began to speak.
"Creation of the Universe," it said, in a quiet measured voice. "Current scientific consensus is that the Universe was sneezed out of the nose of the Great Green Arkleseizure..."
"Well, the Guide is the largest library," the Doctor admitted. "I didn't say 'most accurate.'" 6. Born Another Gender
"Do I have to wear this thing?" Perseus Brown demanded, emerging from the TARDIS in a lurid blue overcoat. "It itches."
"I've told you before about local customs, Percy," the Doctor said.
"Yeah, I know I've gotta wear blue. But that doesn't mean I need a coat. I could just wear-"
"Percy, Tranquil Repose is devoted to dealing with the lately departed and their relatives," the Doctor said patiently. "It really wouldn't be appropriate to show up in a tight T-shirt and lycra shorts. Everything swinging about like Linford Christie," she added, sotto voce. "That'd put anyone off their lunch." 7. Schoolfic
"Aha!" Colin proclaimed. "Kate Usher and Tony Masters, red handed! Peri, you keep an eye on them. Make sure they don't try anything while I go and find the headmaster."
Almost as soon as Colin had left, Kate doubled over, coughing.
"What..." Peri began.
"It's her asthma!" Tony said urgently. "She needs her inhaler. It's in her locker."
"OK, I'll get it. Give me the key." Peri caught the key that Kate tossed her, crossed to the locker, opened it-
-And realised, as she was shoved into the locker and the door slammed on her, that she'd been fooled again. 8. Police/Firefighters
"I thought we'd never get away," Constable Brown said, as they finally stepped out of the Varos Theme Park.
Inspector Smith gave her a worried look. "I know this hasn't been an easy case for you, Constable. You can get into all sorts of trouble when you go undercover."
"In that shirt and trousers, I'm surprised you can go undercover at all," Brown replied. "They must see you coming from miles off."
"If nothing worse, surely it's physically tiring?"
"That's true," Constable Brown said, lifting the head off her duck costume. "You won't believe how hot it gets in here." 9. Urban Fantasy
"What's this?" The Doctor stared in horror at Peri's heaped plate. "Bacon? Sausages? Black pudding? Peri, how many times have I told you that meat is murder?"
"Yeah, I know." Peri looked down at her plate, not willing to meet his eyes. "Look, this probably isn't a good time to say it. But... I've got to."
"Got to?" the Doctor repeated. "Why?"
Finally, Peri looked up. "Remember Tranquil Repose? When Davros was turning all the bodies into vampires?"
"Of course. I put a stop to that nonsense!"
Peri opened her mouth, revealing pointed fangs. "But just too late for me." 10. Harem
Tablibik stepped over the threshold-
-and found himself firmly caught and held.
"Another one?" the Doctor asked.
Peri, suddenly not in the least tipsy, nodded. "Just like Sharaz Jek and Jobel and the rest of them." She pointed at Tablibik. "Rohypnol in my drink."
"How impolite." The Doctor frog-marched Tablibik across to where an open door gaped. "Welcome to Peri's House of Pleasure, young man."
The youth squirmed in the Doctor's iron grip. "Why's it called that?"
"Because you're inside it," Peri said. She watched as the door slammed on Tablibik, with a sound of innumerable bolts. "And I'm not."
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