(no subject)
Feeling down at the moment... not as down as last night but still not happy. Dont know why... or maybe i just cant come to terms with why... i cant stop looking at myself in a new light... a negative one and then when i do i hurt someone who i thought i was hurting but wasnt - the irony of it... it all brings me down. I am so messed up at the moment but hopefully i will get through it. I think shutting out everything i dont want to think about is begining to fail and i am loosing the facade i have held to hide the truth from myself - i worry i have been letting everything pile up - bearing on me but i have ignored it - soon i worry i will collapse under it all - it will all cave in... and i dont think i will be able to cope.
This isnt a cry for help... in no means... it is an escape of truth.. from the mask i usually hold... not to lie to or to hurt you but to lie to myself and to keep myself going.
This isnt a cry for help... in no means... it is an escape of truth.. from the mask i usually hold... not to lie to or to hurt you but to lie to myself and to keep myself going.