(no subject)
Dear Mommy,
Thank you so much for this letter. I had only moments ago, come from dinner, where I, on the verge of tears relayed to my American/Mongolian student peers, my credit cards woes, financial aid worries, and worst of all, Passover angst. Receiving word that you had remembered and accounted for all of it just put me over the edge and I am bursting in to tears as I write this.
I returned from the country only yesterday, and left in a hurry with no time to make Passover plans in advance (it was all I could do to deal with my lost wallet before I left, and even that I left hanging). I ran around today like a chicken without a head, trying desperately to find enough working phones to track down all the key people in making a seder. The number one contact turned out to be none other than the jerk who works at the American embassy, which was my first big disappointment. My second, was the lady who he directed me to, who managed to kick all the holiday spirit out of me in five minutes of speaking.
Okay, so I understand that I called a stranger 30 hours till seder and asking to partake. But honestly, if I had been the one struggling to accumulate enough Jews to pull together a Mongolian seder, and an enthusiastic Jewish girl called and said, "I want to be a part of this!", I would have showed some degree of enthusiasm or at least made her feel welcome. She just harbored this attitude like she was doing me a massive favor, and she guessed she could squeeze me in if she had to. Then I asked if I could bring some of my peers. She asked if they were Jewish and I said no, but they were very interested in and knowledgeable about Judaism and are my family while on this trip. She said, and I quote, "this is not an exhibition nor demonstration nor teaching opportunity. This is a Jewish seder for Jewish people. So if you have to, fine, but I don’t see how that’s necessary." I responded that I’d think on it and call her back.
I thought on it all day, and spoke about it with my friends here (and I have made some wonderful ones). I was so angry mommy, I can’t even tell you. Here I am, in a foreign country, running around all day, making every effort to find a group of people to share my holiday with (spent so much time on it, that there was none left to call my own family before shabbos), and my only Jewish contacts in months gave me an ultimatum: let the holiday pass unacknowledged and uncelebrated, or else celebrate it among strangers (who live, I should add, 20 miles outside of the city) who could care less if I come or not and specifically unwelcome my friends, the only family I have here.
I relayed all this teary eyed to my group, a random assortments of Christians, Mormons, Buddhists, and devout atheists, who all became immediately adamant that they were going to make me a much better seder than that stuck up seder. Laughing, through tears, I realized that despite what Daddy would likely prefer, I would much rather spend my holiday with these fourteen people to whom Passover is foreign but care about me and are eager to learn, than a handful of strangers (Jewish or not) to whom the very meaning of the holiday seems to be lost ("this is not a teaching opportunity?" Are you kidding me?)
All night, my friends have been asking me questions about what we need to do to prepare and why, and they are excited and determined to give me the best seder of my life, and I feel a tremendous pressure to remember everything, or at least enough to make it meaningful. Out of all these years of watching, do I know how to lead and explain a seder independently, to people who know nothing of it?
To top this all off, tomorrow morning we begin our third home stay, in the city this time, but a home stay nonetheless. Which means, not only do I have to whip together a seder for myself, single handedly, in 24 hours…I have to do it in Mongolian.
So yah, I haven’t changed.
Are you rolling your eyes right now? I should have sucked it up and gone to the seder with the Jews, you're thinking. She was probably under stress because of all the maror she had to grate and is probably a fabulous human being between holidays. I do hope that package from chabad comes because there is not one matzah to be found in this country. I really do not know how this is going to turn out, especially with the homestay hurtle to cross. But if anything good has come out of all this, it is a realization of the caliber of friends I have made here, and their respect for the things that I hold important.
I will let you know how this saga ends, but until then, all my love to the family, and I am so sorry I could not reach you before Pesach. I love you guys so much, please know that you are always in my thoughts. Chag Sameach.
Love,
Joanie
Thank you so much for this letter. I had only moments ago, come from dinner, where I, on the verge of tears relayed to my American/Mongolian student peers, my credit cards woes, financial aid worries, and worst of all, Passover angst. Receiving word that you had remembered and accounted for all of it just put me over the edge and I am bursting in to tears as I write this.
I returned from the country only yesterday, and left in a hurry with no time to make Passover plans in advance (it was all I could do to deal with my lost wallet before I left, and even that I left hanging). I ran around today like a chicken without a head, trying desperately to find enough working phones to track down all the key people in making a seder. The number one contact turned out to be none other than the jerk who works at the American embassy, which was my first big disappointment. My second, was the lady who he directed me to, who managed to kick all the holiday spirit out of me in five minutes of speaking.
Okay, so I understand that I called a stranger 30 hours till seder and asking to partake. But honestly, if I had been the one struggling to accumulate enough Jews to pull together a Mongolian seder, and an enthusiastic Jewish girl called and said, "I want to be a part of this!", I would have showed some degree of enthusiasm or at least made her feel welcome. She just harbored this attitude like she was doing me a massive favor, and she guessed she could squeeze me in if she had to. Then I asked if I could bring some of my peers. She asked if they were Jewish and I said no, but they were very interested in and knowledgeable about Judaism and are my family while on this trip. She said, and I quote, "this is not an exhibition nor demonstration nor teaching opportunity. This is a Jewish seder for Jewish people. So if you have to, fine, but I don’t see how that’s necessary." I responded that I’d think on it and call her back.
I thought on it all day, and spoke about it with my friends here (and I have made some wonderful ones). I was so angry mommy, I can’t even tell you. Here I am, in a foreign country, running around all day, making every effort to find a group of people to share my holiday with (spent so much time on it, that there was none left to call my own family before shabbos), and my only Jewish contacts in months gave me an ultimatum: let the holiday pass unacknowledged and uncelebrated, or else celebrate it among strangers (who live, I should add, 20 miles outside of the city) who could care less if I come or not and specifically unwelcome my friends, the only family I have here.
I relayed all this teary eyed to my group, a random assortments of Christians, Mormons, Buddhists, and devout atheists, who all became immediately adamant that they were going to make me a much better seder than that stuck up seder. Laughing, through tears, I realized that despite what Daddy would likely prefer, I would much rather spend my holiday with these fourteen people to whom Passover is foreign but care about me and are eager to learn, than a handful of strangers (Jewish or not) to whom the very meaning of the holiday seems to be lost ("this is not a teaching opportunity?" Are you kidding me?)
All night, my friends have been asking me questions about what we need to do to prepare and why, and they are excited and determined to give me the best seder of my life, and I feel a tremendous pressure to remember everything, or at least enough to make it meaningful. Out of all these years of watching, do I know how to lead and explain a seder independently, to people who know nothing of it?
To top this all off, tomorrow morning we begin our third home stay, in the city this time, but a home stay nonetheless. Which means, not only do I have to whip together a seder for myself, single handedly, in 24 hours…I have to do it in Mongolian.
So yah, I haven’t changed.
Are you rolling your eyes right now? I should have sucked it up and gone to the seder with the Jews, you're thinking. She was probably under stress because of all the maror she had to grate and is probably a fabulous human being between holidays. I do hope that package from chabad comes because there is not one matzah to be found in this country. I really do not know how this is going to turn out, especially with the homestay hurtle to cross. But if anything good has come out of all this, it is a realization of the caliber of friends I have made here, and their respect for the things that I hold important.
I will let you know how this saga ends, but until then, all my love to the family, and I am so sorry I could not reach you before Pesach. I love you guys so much, please know that you are always in my thoughts. Chag Sameach.
Love,
Joanie