crossroads of waiting
I was praying last night that God would tell me what to do about something. I asked him to help me lay down my own will so that I could see His more clearly. And I did. And I got the answer. Just like that. I tried to use it again on the next thing that I was praying about. But it didn't work. Or maybe I fell asleep before I'd gotten to the point of giving up my own will. I just know that God hasn't shown me what to say yet or how I'm supposed to feel yet. The feelings keep coming and there's nothing to do but pour them out before the Lord and wait for the leading. Unfortunately, I feel like I'm running out of time. Should I be moved by the situations around me? Pressed by the uncomfort of broken friendships and perilous times? Forced to make moves that may end up being just my own "good ideas" for lack of God's perfect timing and perfect ways? Or should I trust that He will make everything that is complicated and difficult now at least seem simple and difficult when the time is right? Should I wait for that indescribable move of the Spirit like I felt last night? Or does He really expect me to step out into waves that seem too high and wild and trust that he will give me the words... help me stand upright when I finally get there?