A Fine Read...
Alison Sudol (aka A Fine Frenzy) reacts to Heath Ledger's Tragic and untimely death in this beautifully written musing on today's bustling world...
i know that it happened a few days ago, but heath ledger's death didn't hit me properly until today. i cried, actually... still crying a bit now, though i never knew him... it's just.. what a loss. he was such a talent and was far too young to go. brad renfro, whom i met years ago, also passed away not long ago of a drug overdose. heath was 28, brad was 25. it's just not right.
to the family and friends of both, my deepest sympathies are extended, though i'm sure you'll never see this... it just feels better to say it than not.
pills, powders, needles, anti-depressants, drinks, they sneak up on you. even i, girl who falls asleep on half a glass of wine and won't even get near a cigarette, let alone anything worse, found myself taking tylenol PM to sleep when i was in europe last time. i was taking it every night to combat jet lag and had a full on anxiety attack because of it... it was like nothing i'd ever experienced before or since. i won't touch the stuff again. it's dangerous, it all is. i know some people are going to laugh at me for saying such a thing, but i don't really care. i'm upset.
the world is moving so fast these days. life is bright and rich and exciting, but hard to keep up with sometimes. we've got blackberries, tv, video games, perez hilton, clubs, drugs, flashing lights, fast cars, drive through coffee houses... instant everything. it's good, it's great, wow, you don't have to wait for anything. amazing. however, it does make slowing down and breathing a bit tricky. everything is moving, stand still and you could miss out... the world is competitive, you've gotta stay on the ball, go go go, step aside to catch your breath and someone younger and faster will take your place. if you can't go fast enough on your own, take a pill, have some coffee, sample a bit of this and that. have a few drinks because you're worked up and need to relax. oh, now you can't sleep, so you take this one too... oh my GOD! STOP FOR A MINUTE! i'm making myself dizzy just thinking about it. it's enough to make you insane! call me granny, but man, i sure like a good old fashioned nap sometimes. i think i need one after this paragraph.
the thing is, i worry about some of the stars and starlets in young hollywood. it is so easy to get caught up in a current that can lift you up to the sky or drown you at will. i have a small but wonderful group of friends that would drag me out of those waters and tell me off before my ankles were wet if i ever found myself wandering. i'm lucky. some people get tripped up trusting people that hurt them time and time again, and that can really mess with a person, especially when every painful or vulnerable moment is photographed, reported and made fun of. celebrities are human beings. other people forget that, and i think sometimes they forget it themselves. and then tragedies happen... it's maddening! i'm ashamed of the way people enjoy cutting other people down, truly ashamed. people have died, it's not just fun and games anymore. britney wrote a suicide note and people are still tearing into her. some jerk she went out with is trying to sell videos of her for an obscene amount of money. the poor girl is obviously having a hard time and no one is giving her a break! it makes me so mad. people can be so damn mean. it's like high school but worse, because we're all supposed to act like grown-ups and we don't.
i want to help, but these people are not my friends, i don't know them, i can't call them up to ask them what the eff is going on and demand an ice cream and old movie marathon. it's not like i've got it all figured out anyway, i'm an absolute wreck sometimes, but i've got great people around me and a piano to bang on when i'm a mess.
what to do, what to do? harrumph.
i suppose i just want to say that life is precious. this thing isn't about stars or junkies, it's about a viewpoint, a trend that i see that is just absolutely devastating. our bodies are not invincible, though our spirits are. value yourself, take care of yourself. if you are feeling depressed, listen to music that makes you feel better, call a friend, go for a walk, watch your favorite movie, draw a picture of something stupid that makes you laugh. no matter how bad whatever it is you're going through is, it will always get better, it just might take a little time, patience and courage. you are not alone, even if you feel like you are. and someone be nice to britney spears.
sorry for being depressing.
here are some nice photos i took in germany to lighten the mood a bit.
love and hope,
alison
i know that it happened a few days ago, but heath ledger's death didn't hit me properly until today. i cried, actually... still crying a bit now, though i never knew him... it's just.. what a loss. he was such a talent and was far too young to go. brad renfro, whom i met years ago, also passed away not long ago of a drug overdose. heath was 28, brad was 25. it's just not right.
to the family and friends of both, my deepest sympathies are extended, though i'm sure you'll never see this... it just feels better to say it than not.
pills, powders, needles, anti-depressants, drinks, they sneak up on you. even i, girl who falls asleep on half a glass of wine and won't even get near a cigarette, let alone anything worse, found myself taking tylenol PM to sleep when i was in europe last time. i was taking it every night to combat jet lag and had a full on anxiety attack because of it... it was like nothing i'd ever experienced before or since. i won't touch the stuff again. it's dangerous, it all is. i know some people are going to laugh at me for saying such a thing, but i don't really care. i'm upset.
the world is moving so fast these days. life is bright and rich and exciting, but hard to keep up with sometimes. we've got blackberries, tv, video games, perez hilton, clubs, drugs, flashing lights, fast cars, drive through coffee houses... instant everything. it's good, it's great, wow, you don't have to wait for anything. amazing. however, it does make slowing down and breathing a bit tricky. everything is moving, stand still and you could miss out... the world is competitive, you've gotta stay on the ball, go go go, step aside to catch your breath and someone younger and faster will take your place. if you can't go fast enough on your own, take a pill, have some coffee, sample a bit of this and that. have a few drinks because you're worked up and need to relax. oh, now you can't sleep, so you take this one too... oh my GOD! STOP FOR A MINUTE! i'm making myself dizzy just thinking about it. it's enough to make you insane! call me granny, but man, i sure like a good old fashioned nap sometimes. i think i need one after this paragraph.
the thing is, i worry about some of the stars and starlets in young hollywood. it is so easy to get caught up in a current that can lift you up to the sky or drown you at will. i have a small but wonderful group of friends that would drag me out of those waters and tell me off before my ankles were wet if i ever found myself wandering. i'm lucky. some people get tripped up trusting people that hurt them time and time again, and that can really mess with a person, especially when every painful or vulnerable moment is photographed, reported and made fun of. celebrities are human beings. other people forget that, and i think sometimes they forget it themselves. and then tragedies happen... it's maddening! i'm ashamed of the way people enjoy cutting other people down, truly ashamed. people have died, it's not just fun and games anymore. britney wrote a suicide note and people are still tearing into her. some jerk she went out with is trying to sell videos of her for an obscene amount of money. the poor girl is obviously having a hard time and no one is giving her a break! it makes me so mad. people can be so damn mean. it's like high school but worse, because we're all supposed to act like grown-ups and we don't.
i want to help, but these people are not my friends, i don't know them, i can't call them up to ask them what the eff is going on and demand an ice cream and old movie marathon. it's not like i've got it all figured out anyway, i'm an absolute wreck sometimes, but i've got great people around me and a piano to bang on when i'm a mess.
what to do, what to do? harrumph.
i suppose i just want to say that life is precious. this thing isn't about stars or junkies, it's about a viewpoint, a trend that i see that is just absolutely devastating. our bodies are not invincible, though our spirits are. value yourself, take care of yourself. if you are feeling depressed, listen to music that makes you feel better, call a friend, go for a walk, watch your favorite movie, draw a picture of something stupid that makes you laugh. no matter how bad whatever it is you're going through is, it will always get better, it just might take a little time, patience and courage. you are not alone, even if you feel like you are. and someone be nice to britney spears.
sorry for being depressing.
here are some nice photos i took in germany to lighten the mood a bit.
love and hope,
alison