if it didn't matter that I was 18 when you met me, why do you care that I'm young now?

Dec 14, 2005 03:02

I met a very cute boy at a party one night. we were talking, and he told me how he liked my nose ring, and we talked stoner talk about the things that interested us at the moment, little snippets of conversation that are completely irretrievable due to the drugs in our veins, but the memory of the enjoyment lasts...
when my age somehow came up he got a very panicked look on his face, and grew a bit more distant.
I asked my friend Whitney about him, and she asked him about me, and he liked me very much, but he is concerned, because I'm so young.
the thing is... if I didn't seem 18 to you when we talked, does it matter that I am 18 chronologically?
I'm supposed to be studying for a test right now. I took some adderol, and I am not going to sleep any time soon (I should be awake until Thursday...)
the steady pang of old love pales in comparisson to the heartracing new tingling of a new crush.
I want to remain faithful to my real feelings, but I know I'll end up in bed next to you tonight, so can't I have a little fun pretending there's a chance I'll let this guy take me home?
deep down, I want a husband and a family.
however, I lack the steadiness and the willpower to postpone short term gratification for the lasting fulfillment of a meaningful relationship.
one night stands are better sex anyway.
I know your body, your smell, your sounds, your tricks.
did I mention that I haven't done coke?
hahaha...
he grabbed my thigh and told me I look like I've lost weight, and I told him I haven't been eaten because I haven't really been awake often enough to want to consume food.
I wish I could eat a huge feast and then hibernate.
humans should hibernate.
civilization should shut down during the winter.
got the mic in my hand, I'm a bad man.
I'm a bad man.
I'm a bad man...
study drugs backfired and now I can't sit still.
the pile of work is insurmountable, I will ignore it and hope that it goes away.
I'm like my dog.
if I close my eyes, my homework can't see me.
where would I be without you?
I only think about you?
and I'm so tired of being lonely...
so baby girl put it on me...
I'm tired of this entry, and so I am posting it.
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