Just wanna Scream
I don't know how much longer I can hold it in. I think things hurt way more if you find them out for yourself instead of someone telling you. Becasue then they don't know that you know. So you can't exactly be mad because they'll have no idea why you are. Fuck that! I'm pissed. I seriously feel like screaming, but I'm at work so I really don't think that's the greatest idea right now. Seriously though. I don't understand why he just can't tell me. He has to hide it from me I guess. Well, if he has to hide it, maybe it's not a good idea, and he feels guilty, don't ya think? Hopefully I'll get to see his bitch-ass today so I can yell at him and really find out what the fuck is going on between us once and for all. If I don't get a straight answer..... it's over. I'm tired of waisting my time, AND money on him. I'm ready for something more seriouse then a friend with benefits! Fuck!! I seriously need to find someone between the ages of 20 and 26. Yea, that's a good range. Grrrr, I'm just so pissed right now I don't know what to do. How can someone be so pissed this early in the morning?? I just.... really thought he cared about me. I knew it was'nt as much as I cared about him but maybe just a little. Then again, I'm fucking stupid. I knew how much he was taking advatage of me. I knew every little trick he would pull. I knew I was giving in. I knew exactly what was going on. But I went a long with it because I'm an idiot. I don't need this shit. I've put up with way more then anyone knows. I've been through more emotional distress with him then anybody else in my entire life. FUCK! I just don't know what to do or say or anything. I just feel like writing obscenities. Serves me right for liking a whore.