Be strong
It hurts every minute I'm awake.. Sometimes when I'm asleep too. You know when you're so hurt that you can't sleep? When you wake up every hour cos the pain won't allow something as peaceful as sleep? That it has to remind you every hour how alone you are? How worthless you are?
You know those tears that happen to steam down your cheeks? You could be doing the simplest of things: Getting a glass of water or washing the dishes and they'll just start. Uncontrollable tears overwhelming you with pain- reminding you that you are alone and not worth it. Always alone. Empty. Tears all the time. Crying all the time. Can't see because your vision is so blurry from all the crying but you just can't seem to stop. The pain is so much and the loneliness just makes it so much worse. You must have been crying for months now. You're always crying.
You lost or are losing your bestfriend and you don't want to let anyone know because you're ashamed of what he did to you. Ashamed that you're hurt. Ashamed that you're not enough.. That he had to go to someone else for things you should have provided: companionship, friendship and God knows what else. But don't blame yourself... You're always so hard on yourself. You should be stronger than that. He used to tell you that and say that he didn't deserve your tears. But you know you're weak and he deserves an ocean of tears for how good he was to you and all the love and happiness you felt with him. But don't be weak because you deserve better. Be strong because you want change. Be strong when he doesn't want you anymore. Be strong when he wants someone else. Please don't beg for a man that never felt you were enough. Please don't beg for a man that does not want you. Maybe he will come around.. But maybe he won't. So be ready for that and be strong.
Whatever you decide and whatever happens, be careful. Don't trust them no matter how kind or loving or sweet or caring they are. You always get hurt and that's your fault because you forget to take care of yourself and protect who's important. You. You believe the lies because you want to see the best in people. You believe the lies because it's easier than facing the pain. You believe the lies to avoid an argument. I know it hurts so much but please be strong for yourself because that's all you have now. Yourself.
You know those tears that happen to steam down your cheeks? You could be doing the simplest of things: Getting a glass of water or washing the dishes and they'll just start. Uncontrollable tears overwhelming you with pain- reminding you that you are alone and not worth it. Always alone. Empty. Tears all the time. Crying all the time. Can't see because your vision is so blurry from all the crying but you just can't seem to stop. The pain is so much and the loneliness just makes it so much worse. You must have been crying for months now. You're always crying.
You lost or are losing your bestfriend and you don't want to let anyone know because you're ashamed of what he did to you. Ashamed that you're hurt. Ashamed that you're not enough.. That he had to go to someone else for things you should have provided: companionship, friendship and God knows what else. But don't blame yourself... You're always so hard on yourself. You should be stronger than that. He used to tell you that and say that he didn't deserve your tears. But you know you're weak and he deserves an ocean of tears for how good he was to you and all the love and happiness you felt with him. But don't be weak because you deserve better. Be strong because you want change. Be strong when he doesn't want you anymore. Be strong when he wants someone else. Please don't beg for a man that never felt you were enough. Please don't beg for a man that does not want you. Maybe he will come around.. But maybe he won't. So be ready for that and be strong.
Whatever you decide and whatever happens, be careful. Don't trust them no matter how kind or loving or sweet or caring they are. You always get hurt and that's your fault because you forget to take care of yourself and protect who's important. You. You believe the lies because you want to see the best in people. You believe the lies because it's easier than facing the pain. You believe the lies to avoid an argument. I know it hurts so much but please be strong for yourself because that's all you have now. Yourself.