Difficulty 1/1
TITLE: Difficulty 1/1 -
prompt #002 on my FIC 100 prompt table
Synopsis: Ianto Jones is having a little difficulty with sleep. (a little ianto angst)
Rating: R
Spoiler(s): slight s2 finale spoiler
Pairing: Ianto/Jack. (of course)
a/n - had a little eddit os my muse pointed something out to me and she was right. The part of which she was refering to was indeed very annoying.
02:47
Ianto Jones stared at the clock that rested on his bedside table; it was the fourth time in five long minutes that he had glared at it, hoping that enough time would have passed for him to get up. The large bed looked as though someone had been wrestling in it. Three of the four pillows had been thrown onto the floor during his long battle with sleeplessness along with half a lumpy duvet; the other half was draped over the Welshman as he lay shattered on the edge of the bed. Eyes wide open, praying to be shut.
His body wanted to sleep but his mind was occupied elsewhere, tangled up in living nightmares and visions, memories that refused to leave his head and just let him rest. His mind was shattered, his body was barely working and his patience wearing thin. Ianto Jones hadn't slept for three nights and it was starting to get beyond a joke. Usually he would read a book and the scenes would leap out from the page and cover over the tormenting visions in his mind, but that didn't seem to work any more; nothing did.
He pondered his options for a moment. He only had two choices; get up or stay in bed.
Ianto let out a aggravated sigh and pulled the duvet over his face hoping that the darkness would help. After a moment of anxiousness and frustration Ianto allowed his body to relax and his heavy lids started to fall until they were closed. They stung for a second whilst they adjusted to their new position and his breathing slowed to a steady pace and finally, he was asleep.
02:52
'Finally,' Ianto thought as he woke from a restful sleep, 'morning.' He lowered the duvet from his face and sat up to a darkened room again. It had felt as though he were a sleep, his mind had told him that he had slept for hours, but the room was still as dark as it had been before.
He had suffered enough. He kicked the duvet off with his feet, let out an almighty roar of annoyance and rolled over to the edge of the bed. He dangled his legs over the side and slipped them into the leather slippers that awaited them. The Welshman held his head in his hands and wiped his face with him palm before standing up and switching on the light.
“Ah!” Ianto groaned and covered his eyes with his arm; the light made his eyes hurt. He rubbed the pain away with his hand until his sight adjusted and grabbed a towel from the wardrobe.
He was going to be very early for work this morning.
03:02
“Hello?” The voice at the other end of the telephone wasn't groggy, despite the hour, just a little confused.
“Jack, I'm glad I caught you.”
A familiar chuckle echoed on the line and Ianto could hear Jack as he sat down at the desk and put his feet up; the squeak-clunk-thud was a dead give-away. “Well where else would I be at--” he paused to check the time. “Three am? Are you kidding me?”
“Three minutes past three actually. I was just wondering if my diagnostic had finished running yet?”
“You were just wondering if your diagnostic had finished?” Jack's tone was one of disbelief.
“Yes.”
“At this hour?”
“Yes.”
“Hold on.” Jack let out a long sigh and Ianto could hear the handset as it hit the desk with a dull thud. He waited for a moment until he heard heavy booted footsteps getting louder, and louder, then stop.“No, it's still running. Now go to sleep.”
“I thought maybe I could come in early and check--”
“No.” He didn't give Ianto a chance to speak “Sleep. I'll see you in five hours.”
Ianto held the phone between his shoulder and his ear as he zipped up his trousers and put on his belt. “But--”
“You had better not be getting dressed,” he warned, “I'll send you right back home to bed.”
Ianto fell suspiciously silent. “I'm not getting--”
“I can hear you bucking your belt. And don't say you're not.” The smile in his voice was obvious. “I've taken that belt off enough times to know it by ear alone.”
Ianto sat down on the bed. “Well if I came in early you could--”
“Ianto?” Jack sighed. “Sleep!”
“I can't sleep. I've tried.”
“Try harder,” he begged, “I'm sick of watching you force yourself awake with triple espresso's every half an hour.”
“Jack--”
“If you come in here looking like you did yesterday then I'm going to have no option but to send you home until you're in a fit state to work.” He was playing the boss card now, but Ianto couldn't ignore the softer tone of his voice. “I can't have you in here if you're not awake enough to do your job.”
“Couldn't I just come and sleep in your bed?”
Ianto could almost hear Jack's smirk.“We wouldn't end up sleeping.”
“Well that would definitely tire me out.”
“Any other day I would welcome that, in fact any other day I'm pretty sure that I would come and drag you out of bed by your ankles for that, but I've seen you the last few days.” Jack sighed and sat down in his chair. “You really don't look yourself, and I don't like seeing that.”
“I'm fine.” Ianto perfected the half-Windsor knot in his tie and centred it a little. “I don't need sleep.”
“If you don't hang up right now and go to bed I swear that I'm going to invalidate your security clearance until tomorrow.”
Ianto was silent for a moment. “You wouldn't do that.”
“I really would.” Jack pressed a few buttons on the computer screen and got up Ianto's file.
He heard the distinctive beeping of someone accessing the security settings. “Okay! Okay.” He sighed heavily. “You win.”
“Just try and tire yourself out,” he said, “do one of those soduku puzzle things that I hate or something.”
“Fine.”
“I'll see you later.”
03:20
Ianto Jones worked his way through his second soduku puzzle. He had stayed in his suit, after all he only had a few more hours before he would have to get dressed anyway.
“I thought I told you to go to bed.”
Ianto practically jumped out of his chair; the pen that he was holding propelled through the air and assaulted the man standing behind him causing a blue streak to appear on his cheek. Ianto stood up and put the puzzle on the table. “You scared the hell out of me!”
Jack chuckled and dropped his keys onto the bowl behind Ianto's couch. “Sorry.”
”What are you doing here?”
Jack removed his coat and hung it up on the back of the door. “I came to check that you were sleeping.”
“I can't. I tried.”
“It doesn't look like you're trying very hard. You didn't even get undressed let alone get back into bed.”
“Well, I--”
“No more excuses.” Jack walked over to the Welshman and pulled at his tie until it came undone. “I'm going to make us a drink and you're going to go into your bedroom and slip into something a little more comfortable.” He unbuttoned Ianto's shirt. “Then come back and we'll have one last drink before we go to bed.”
“Are you staying?”
“What do you think?” He closed the gap between them and slipped his hand underneath Ianto's shirt, caressing his warm skin with his cold hands. Jack kissed him softly and let it linger. “Now go.”
Ianto gave in and walked towards his bedroom, then stopped and turned to face him. He leaned on the door frame. “Now you do know how a kettle works, don't you Jack?”
“Just go and make yourself pretty for me.” He winked. “I'm sure I can figure it out.”
Ianto walked into the bedroom and did what he was told; he hung up his suit and stripped down to his boxer shorts. He rummaged through his drawer until he located a t-shirt and slipped it on, then threw the duvet over his bed and adjusted the pillows.
When he walked into the kitchen he smiled; the vision that appeared was somewhat unexpected, but not at all unwelcome.
“That's not something you see every day.” Ianto walked behind Jack and wrapped his arms around him. He kissed his neck and played with the elastic waistband of the Captain's underwear with his fingers.
His clothes had been folded up and placed on one of the kitchen chairs; it left Jack Harkness in nothing but his boxer shorts and the white t-shirt he wore underneath absolutely everything. He smiled a little and leaned back into the Welshman; Ianto's fingers had ventured underneath the fabric and were currently teasing his warm skin with feathery light touches. He wrapped his hand around Jack's cock and started to stroke the length; his thumb ran over the head lightly in a tantalising circular motion. Ianto Jones was a master at caressing Jack in just the right way and when he gasped at his touch he smiled in triumph and lowered his lips to whisper in his lovers ear.
“I'm so glad you popped by.” He kissed his neck. “I was getting a little bored all by myself in the middle of the night.”
Jack moaned and licked his lips before gripping onto Ianto's thighs; he dug his nails into the flesh and held on to stop himself from toppling over. “You know,” he replied breathlessly, “this actually isn't what I came for.”
“I could stop if you would like?” Ianto increased his pace and smiled when Jack let out a weak whimper. “You just have to say the word.”
Jack bit down on his tongue so hard it almost bled. “No. Th-this is good, just not what I came for.”
“In a moment you'll have completely forgotten what you came for,” Ianto whispered. He adjusted his pace a little, moving his hand along the length a little faster; he pressed himself into Jack from behind and nibbled on his ear. “I would imagine that sleeping isn't very high on your agenda at the moment. Would I be right Jack?”
“You would be right.” Ianto's slight change of pace made the Captain's knees buckle a little and a moan escaped his lips that was just a little too high pitched for him to maintain his dignity. “I can't actually remember why sleep is so important.”
“I don't know if I'm more turned on by the fact that you're standing in my kitchen in only your underwear, or by the fact that you actually folded up your clothes.” Ianto whispered into his lovers ear.
“I thought I should lead by example.” Jack let out a strangled groan as Ianto's talented fingers smoothed over the head of his cock. “I can be neat too.”
“I like neat.” Ianto baked away a little ad turned Jack towards him; he kissed him hard, stroking his length between them, and pressed his back against the kitchen counter; he pushed the Captain's underwear down a little for better access.
Jack kissed him back, pushing himself into the stroke of the Welshman's hand. He grabbed a fistful of Ianto's hair and kissed him harder; his lips caressed the younger man's mouth, darting out his tongue to taste the sweetness of the kiss. He pulled away gasping for breath and lay his head on Ianto's shoulder. He sunk his teeth into the Welshman's skin and gripped onto the material of his t-shirt. His breaths got shallower and more frequent. His skin got hot. Small beads of sweat started to roll from his brow. Jack Harnkess was whimpering, begging with a voice that was no longer capable of making distinguishable speech and Ianto was loving it.
The Welshman tugged Jack's hands off his shirt and forced them against the kitchen cupboard, then held them there; Jack's knuckles went white with the pressure as the youngerr man ravaged his neck with his lips. He moved his kisses south, trailing them over his chest and to his stomach; Ianto dropped to his knees and surrounded Jack's cock with the warmth of his lips.
Jack shut his eyes tight and hit his head on the cabinet; he didn't even feel it. His fingers gripped the handles and an undignified moan escaped his lips. He felt Ianto's lips curve into a smile as they caressed his length. His moans turned into pleads and his pleads into throaty roars; his temperature seemed to rise and his blood pressure surged. Jack bit down on his lip as he felt the release and moved his hand to caress Ianto's hair.
Ianto kissed Jack's hipbones on the way back up his body and pulled his lover's underwear back up; his lips caressed Jack's stomach and chest. His kisses finally rested on Jack's parted lips.
“I forgot why I came,” Jack said, regaining his breath.
Ianto smiled and kissed the spot just below his ear. “I think it's because I'm good.”
“You know that's not what I meant.” He kissed Ianto's neck softly and wrapped his arms around the Welshman's neck. “Although you are very good at that.”
“Just that?”
“Other things too.” Jack pulled him closer and kissed his lips softly. “I think that we should take the day off tomorrow.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, I mean when was the last time we spent all day in bed?”
“Last Thursday,” he said, “although, that was more to do with that Alien virus than anything else.”
“I thought we could just relax today. Gwen can handle things on her own, plus it' not like we're not around should there be an emergency.”
“I like that.”
“Somehow I thought you would.” Jack looked at the clock. “You should probably get some sleep soon.”
Ianto sighed. “You promised me a drink first.”
He rolled his eyes. “You're like a naughty child, you know that?” Jack ducked out of his arms and picked up two mugs from the bench. He put them on the table and sat down. “Any excuse to stay up late.”
Ianto sat down and looked down into his cup, then stared at it even more closely; it was completely white without the tiniest hint of coffee colour. “Jack, How much milk did you put in my coffee?”
“All milk, no coffee. Coffee keeps you awake and I know how you feel about decaf.”
“Decaf is not coffee!” Ianto was practically insulted. “It's water with colouring.”
“It's warm milk.” Jack changed the subject. “I thought it would relax you.”
Ianto sniffed it, then eyed Jack with suspicion. “Did you put something in it?”
“Sugar?”
“No sleeping pills?”
“Of course not!”
The Welshman almost took a sip but stopped before the warm liquid could come into contact with his lips “Or nine hour retcon?”
“What do you take me for?”
“You never make me a drink.” He took a sip. “Don't blame me for being a little suspicious.”
“Exactly.” Jack sighed. “Sometimes at night when I'm in the office working away you come in and point at the clock. You refuse to leave until I'm relaxed and down in my bunk away from my desk.” Jack took his hand and held it from across the kitchen table; he held his gaze for a moment before looking down at Ianto's long fingers. “You make me hot milk and give me a massage until I'm relaxed.”
Ianto leaned across the table. “I also tie you up and have outrageously filthy sex with you.”
Jack smiled; he looked almost embarrassed. “Well, yes, that too. But you're missing the point.” He walked around the table and put his hands on his shoulders. “Time to stop worrying about everyone else.”
“Y'know, I hate warm milk,” Ianto said, “my mum used to force me to drink it as a kid.”
“Oh.”
Ianto sniffed the mug. “I used to drink it because she made it and I didn't want her to be upset.”
“I can make you something else.”
Ianto swept his finger around the rim of the mug lazily. “She died never knowing that. She thought that I liked it, in fact she thought it was my favourite.”
“This isn't about milk.” Jack sat down beside him.
“Why do you say that?”
“Call me crazy but this whole thing just reeks of something more serious. You're usually sleeping like a baby two minutes after your head hits the pillow.”
Ianto let out a long sigh. “There's so much that people think they know about me Jack.” He took a sip and forced it down. “And I like it that way sometimes. Putting up a fake persona makes it so much easier to hide who you really are“
Jack pulled the milk away from Ianto's reach. “What's going on with you?”
“Honestly?”
“Yes please.”
“It's you.” He said it without looking up.
“Me?” Jack pulled his hand away from him suddenly. “Did I do something?”
“Nothing that you can help.” Ianto stood up and put his cup in the sink then started to wash it up. “You just have certain expectations of me that I can't always live up to. It' not your fault, it's just the way you are I suppose.”
“What do you mean?”
“It doesn't matter.”
“I think it does.”
Ianto sighed and dropped the mug back into the sink and leaned on the counter looking down at the floor. “The things that you do, the things that you say, after a while the pressure gets to me.”
“You make no sense.”
“Okay.” Ianto sighed. “I always wanted to look strong, like I couldn't be broken but it's a lie.”
“Everyone can be broken.” Jack walked up behind him and put his hand on his shoulder. “Even you.”
“I've tried not breaking Jack, I really have.”
“It' not exactly something you can control.”
“I manage most of the time.”
“What's this about?” Jack put his hand on his shoulder. “This seems so out of the blue.”
“I love you, and I would do anything to make you see that. But then I realised that I can't do this any more, I cant keep playing this game, pretending that I'm someone that I'm not.” Ianto turned to face him. “I'm not as strong as you think I am.”
“You think that I'm under the impression that you're unbreakable?”
“Sometimes I do.” He raised his eyes from the floor. “You test me far too much not to.”
“I do?”
“When Tosh died you just left me to it.” Ianto's voice shook as he spoke. “You and Gwen, you walked away and dealt with your grief and left me on my own to lay her out, to clean her up and make her look like the Tosh we remembered instead of the bleeding wreck you left on the floor.” A tear rolled down his cheek; he hadn't even known it was coming. “Her eyes opened Jack, she looked at me and I had to close them again, and I didn't want to.”
“Ianto--”
“They kept opening. It can happen sometimes with dead bodies. I kept closing them, every time they opened I shut them.”
“I--” Jack tried to interrupt.
“Then after I had closed them a few times they opened again and she was alive in my mind for a minute. I thought she had come back, then I realised that it was irrational. Only you come back.” His last words were bitter and his eyes glowed with darkness
“You should have said something.”
"I didn't think i had to."
Jack stepped towards him and wrapped his arms around the Welshman. “I guess I didn't think about it.”
He pushed Jack to arms length and then shoved him towards the kitchen table a little. “You're sorry because you don't think about my feelings, or how I might feel when you make me clean up one of my best friends without any support from anyone else.”
“So I take you for granted, you don't think I realise that?” He moved back towards Ianto. “I'm selfish sometimes.”
“I've noticed.”
“I'm not used to looking out for anyone else,” Jack said, “This, you and me, It's a new thing.”
Ianto looked at his feet. “You don't have to tell me that.”
“Before you I had been on my own for so long. The only person I had to look out for was myself, and I had nobody to look out for me.” Jack braved closing the gap and took his hand. “You look out for me and sometimes I forget that it's a two way street.”
“I understand that.”
“I do care for you. You know how I feel.”
“I know, I'm sorry.” Ianto sighed and shook his head. “I'm just sleep deprived.”
“It's okay. I understand.” Jack wrapped his arms around him and kissed his lips softly. “Which, if you remember, is why I'm here.” He took Ianto's hand and led him towards the bedroom, switching off the light as he passed the switch; he led Ianto into the bedroom and shut the door behind them.
“I'm an arsehole,” Ianto said as he walked towards the bed, “aren't I?”
“No.” Jack helped Ianto pull back the duvet and got into the bed; he yanked Ianto's hand and pulled him down with him. “You had good reason to say what you did.”
“Really?” Ianto slipped underneath Jack's arm and rested his head on his chest.
“I try not to be selfish but I've been that way for so long now.”
“Don't worry about it.” Ianto closed his eyes. “Everyone is selfish sometimes.”
“There's sometimes and there's all the time.” He pulled Ianto a little closer. “I save the world enough, the least I could do is take time to save you once in a while.”
Ianto said nothing; his breathing was steady and his fingers were limp against Jack's chest; his difficulty sleeping was gone for now.