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well, yesterday was my b-day. it was alright. some ups, some downs, some mysteries. i woke up to a million phone calls from family and friends and fresh hot blueberry muffins. then i went to school and my teachers were letting me do whatever i wanted and someone bought my lunch and i had a good time. then i went home and it slowed down some. then
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1. i know you didnt deliver it, i know it wasnt a mustang, yes i recognized your handwriting.
2.no response really. i cant say who did it, i cant know, and i no longer have the ability to believe a lot of things i hear or am promised, even if sworn up and down.
3.you can have the courage. i tried a thousand times to tell you that. you never listened. i am not, will not be mad at her. i have no reason, u kno the saying " dont shoot the messenger"
4.you didnt hurt me or stop me or hold me back from anything until you left. then my life ceased to have meaning for the longest no matter how well i covered it up.
5.this one conflicts with all of the other things that have happened and been said. if you wanted me happy you would have fought for us a fraction as hard as i did and then it would have been the fairy tale. you made me happy, you made me jody, and i still havent completely found jody. oh, and a certain liquid is a lot worse with me now.
6.when have you ever known me to curse, spit, scream, or yell at you. i dont even know if it is worth trying to get you to understand that. never have never will.
you do decide that, but words dont mean much anymore. you proved it for a while. that is when it meant something. then something made you up and leave it.
do i care? i do. do i care to show it? i have no reason. what makes you say this now. think about the last two words that you said to me before you hung up on me. that still rings through my head and kills me inside that you would turn on me like that and say that. im sorry i am not what i once was, but i am more sorry that i am not worth fighting for...
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