Some kind of secret race
I just realized I forgot to give my August 2014 update. Part of my series where every August of my life has been different than the August before for nearly the past decade. This one was most obviously different. A new job, a new city, a new routine. Grant got married. Sarah visited from New Haven, and at the end of the month we moved her to Providence. It was pretty hectic.
I feel like the hectic of everything has gotten to me in some way. I feel like I got back from Brussels last week and its been weeks. The trip was pretty interesting. Most of the time was spent working. Not so much designing as it was reworking presentations again and again. In the end, I was kind of excited because the design for the overall school and individual neighborhood cells were the ones I initially developed and put forth for the team. I really felt from the beginning they were the better schemes and it was really nice to hear the clients react the same way in the end. Since being back I've shifted my time to a BAM project in Brooklyn. I am kind of excited about this one as it could turn out really cool and Brooklyn-esk.
But the feelings I wrote about last time persist. I feel like I am getting more connected to my work life and the office. Trying to be the real me. But I have yet to feel as though the me outside of the office is living up to my expectations. Is this what I thought I would be like in New York? Not really. Maybe my expectations were already set to high from my previous lives. Maybe I'm also comparing my life here to the best experiences there, which isn't fair. I dunno. It brings me down and makes me sad. Which dissipates my energy. Which disallows me from being the me I want to be. I'm not getting things done like I would like. I'm not attending all of the things I would like to do. I keep bugging out on things and just wanting to go home. I need to get out of this rut.
In two weeks I will begin studying for my first ARE examination. I am pretty excited to get started on that. It will surely turn me into a hermit for the next few months. I will have to become much less social and much more focused on passing these 7 deadly little fuckers. I remember Danny telling me about how he had no social life, but it was the best thing just doing them all in one shot and never thinking about them again. Do this now, be licensed for life. It is a very expensive investment. Not just in money, but in a country. I suppose I will be staying a while now. New York better work out. No pressure.
soundtrack to entry:
I feel like the hectic of everything has gotten to me in some way. I feel like I got back from Brussels last week and its been weeks. The trip was pretty interesting. Most of the time was spent working. Not so much designing as it was reworking presentations again and again. In the end, I was kind of excited because the design for the overall school and individual neighborhood cells were the ones I initially developed and put forth for the team. I really felt from the beginning they were the better schemes and it was really nice to hear the clients react the same way in the end. Since being back I've shifted my time to a BAM project in Brooklyn. I am kind of excited about this one as it could turn out really cool and Brooklyn-esk.
But the feelings I wrote about last time persist. I feel like I am getting more connected to my work life and the office. Trying to be the real me. But I have yet to feel as though the me outside of the office is living up to my expectations. Is this what I thought I would be like in New York? Not really. Maybe my expectations were already set to high from my previous lives. Maybe I'm also comparing my life here to the best experiences there, which isn't fair. I dunno. It brings me down and makes me sad. Which dissipates my energy. Which disallows me from being the me I want to be. I'm not getting things done like I would like. I'm not attending all of the things I would like to do. I keep bugging out on things and just wanting to go home. I need to get out of this rut.
In two weeks I will begin studying for my first ARE examination. I am pretty excited to get started on that. It will surely turn me into a hermit for the next few months. I will have to become much less social and much more focused on passing these 7 deadly little fuckers. I remember Danny telling me about how he had no social life, but it was the best thing just doing them all in one shot and never thinking about them again. Do this now, be licensed for life. It is a very expensive investment. Not just in money, but in a country. I suppose I will be staying a while now. New York better work out. No pressure.
soundtrack to entry: