I feel disoriented. @.@
Last night was the first night in ages that I was asleep before midnight, not because I was drop-dead exhausted, but because I actually just WENT TO BED. O.o
This weekend I made a decision that's going to affect a few people, so Lyn, Sara, anyone else whom I chat with on a regular basis (told Sakata on the phone last night): I will not be on AIM on work-nights anymore. O.o
It was so hard to make this decision, seriously. I've been chatting almost every night for the past three years and it's become a habit. It was fun, an escape, but I'm not sure it was one I needed. Although, let me tell you, it was frellin' BIZZARE not going on the computer last night.
In the past few months, though, I've come to realize how damaging a habit it had become. I was averaging 3 hours of sleep a night, and was exhausted all of the time, barely able to function at work and after work and I was LATE for work more times than I want to count. >.< My health was really starting to suffer for it; I was becoming depressed more easily because I was too tired to think logically when bad things happened or when I was stressed. I think my weight gain was do to the lack of sleep, in part, as well. My personal and work relationships in RL were starting to become strained and I seriously think I almost lost a very close friendship because of my inability to focus on what was important to us.
This Saturday, I had a very revealing session with my counselor. She helped me realize that I really need to start taking a look at what I want to do with my life, what goals I want to strive for, where I want to be professionally and personally. While I still have a long way to go before I really have ambitions of my own, it did give me that final push I needed to take the first step in focusing on my personal needs. For my health and my career, I needed to make this huge decision. O.o
So, yeah, no more late night chatting during the week. Does this mean I'm leaving the internet? Hell no! I'll still be chatting on Fridays and Saturdays (because it doesn't matter when I get up the next day), I'll still be updating this journal and my Sheezy and DevArt galleries, plus I'm still going to stick with the yaoi mailing list RP that I'm in. I want to get back to my art and writing, though, and for that I need to get my brain rested and energized. ^_^
Hopefully I'll still see you all on weekends and I hope to hear from you all through email and maybe even snail mail! Later, folks!
This weekend I made a decision that's going to affect a few people, so Lyn, Sara, anyone else whom I chat with on a regular basis (told Sakata on the phone last night): I will not be on AIM on work-nights anymore. O.o
It was so hard to make this decision, seriously. I've been chatting almost every night for the past three years and it's become a habit. It was fun, an escape, but I'm not sure it was one I needed. Although, let me tell you, it was frellin' BIZZARE not going on the computer last night.
In the past few months, though, I've come to realize how damaging a habit it had become. I was averaging 3 hours of sleep a night, and was exhausted all of the time, barely able to function at work and after work and I was LATE for work more times than I want to count. >.< My health was really starting to suffer for it; I was becoming depressed more easily because I was too tired to think logically when bad things happened or when I was stressed. I think my weight gain was do to the lack of sleep, in part, as well. My personal and work relationships in RL were starting to become strained and I seriously think I almost lost a very close friendship because of my inability to focus on what was important to us.
This Saturday, I had a very revealing session with my counselor. She helped me realize that I really need to start taking a look at what I want to do with my life, what goals I want to strive for, where I want to be professionally and personally. While I still have a long way to go before I really have ambitions of my own, it did give me that final push I needed to take the first step in focusing on my personal needs. For my health and my career, I needed to make this huge decision. O.o
So, yeah, no more late night chatting during the week. Does this mean I'm leaving the internet? Hell no! I'll still be chatting on Fridays and Saturdays (because it doesn't matter when I get up the next day), I'll still be updating this journal and my Sheezy and DevArt galleries, plus I'm still going to stick with the yaoi mailing list RP that I'm in. I want to get back to my art and writing, though, and for that I need to get my brain rested and energized. ^_^
Hopefully I'll still see you all on weekends and I hope to hear from you all through email and maybe even snail mail! Later, folks!