(no subject)

Oct 25, 2004 22:58

well i got over failing my test, and now i have a new date for the test on the 13th of November... hopefully i'll do really good. i'm going to practice practice practice :) this weekend was pretty good. friday i went to the mall with amanda and amanda. saturday i failed my drivers test but oh well, there's always other tries. then i worked 4-930 and then sunday i worked 11-7 with Christina... she's awesome :) then i had school today and worked 4-930 with Christina again. we're becomming pretty good friends. we get along really well.

lately i've been realizing a lot of things. my friends mean more to me then anything in the world. they're my first priority. they are ALWAYS there for me when i need someone and i can always depend on them for anything. i know that sometimes we fight and sometimes we go thru hard times but who doesn't? i'm not going to hold some stupid fight against someone who's honesty and generousity towers over their mistake. lifes too short to hold grudges, to hate people, to look down on people. you never know when you're life could end.. something unexpected could happen and something could leave your life like that. don't waste your time being mad at people and not giving people the time of day, you only live once and time goes by so fast. live life the way YOU want to, regardless of what people have to say. if you want to do something, do it.. obviously think of the consequences but don't stall at doing something because you're afraid of what other people are going to say and how people are going to judge you. it's your life, you shouldn't have to sit around and let people run it.. in the long run 10 years from now you're probably not going to see 3/4 of the people you see today in school, so what difference is it going to make? everyone has regrets including myself, but i'm not going to sit around and thrive on what i did wrong and what i wish i didn't do. the past is the past, you can't change it, you can't fix it, so don't worry about it. people are way too judgemental. DON'T change yourself for someone elses liking.. the only time you should change yourself is FOR yourself and NO ONE ELSE. no matter what you look like, fat or skinny, tall or short, ugly or hott, you are a beautiful person no matter what. everyone has their good qualities no matter what people think. everyone is beautiful on the inside, some people don't show their beautiful side because of assholes who ruin their self confidence and courage to speak out and be themselves. i used to be quiet and not show my true side, but now i don't care what people think. i'm myself, i'm happy with it, so deal. i do have my flaws i wish i could fix but i'm not going to spend the rest of my life trying to. if you don't like me, i can't help that, not everyone is going to like me and i don't want everyone to like me, i don't need dozens of friends, i only need that handful that i can ALWAYS go to whenever i need someone. i make mistakes, i do things wrong, i do things i shouldn't, i say things i shouldn't, i piss people off, i think things that i shouldn't, i speak when i should keep my mouth shut, i make decisions that piss other people off, but i'm myself, i'm human, i make mistakes, i do things wrong, i don't have perfect written across my forhead. no one does, no one ever will. that's life.
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