What they don't mention about heavy drugs!
I visited my local ER this morning in lieu of going to work. You know, cause why not, right? :) I had a kidney stone attack and rather than waiting (Like silly me did last time) until the pain was an 8 or 9 and begging the nurse to make the "10" pain stop by poking me with any random needle she could find ... I just decided to go as soon as I was certain it was a kidney stone. :) It worked MUCH better with the "let's wimp out earlier" mentality. I hemmed and hawed over calling Mike because I knew the drill and I knew I'd be ok, but I did remember that they didn't let me drive home last time so I broke down and called the guy. He raced through early morning beltway rush hour traffic on his day off to come take care of me. Ok, so the nice nurse with the pain drugs and the IV was really taking care of me. But Mike did his best. :) He even apparently called friends to tell them I was "ill."
I didn't even cry when the nice nurse poked me! I did, however, through the thinly disguised veil of small talk, make sure that the girl from Harford Tech (local vo tech) was going NOWHERE near my person with that sharp pointy object. She didn't look any happier than I did with the thought of poking me, much to my satisfaction! First, they gave me "pain drugs light." More taste, less calories? Much like all things "light," (soda, Beer, sugary snacks) the light drugs didn't have quite the kick the deliverer promised. When they came in to ask how I was doing and could see me squirming on the (suprisingly comfortable) stretcher, they pumped up the juice! That was just about when Mike got there. I was so friendly! AND, I had the added bonus of there being 2 MIKES at once! Holy cow. That stuff was bizarre. The biggest head rush ever on the whole planet.
Once it was 10am, I decided to call my parents just for the information passing. Not that they could really do anything living on the other side of hte world. But I wanted ot mess with their (ok, her) head. The last time they were getting ready to go on vacation to San Diego, my brother got hurt and my mom went there. They were getting up early to leave for the rescheduled San Diego trip today. So I called and in my heavily slurred drugged up voice I said, "Remember the last time you were getting ready to go to S.D. and you got a phone call to let you know your kid was in the ER? I decided to not break with tradition!" Luckily, it's my mother so she just sighed and said "Oh, so you're in the ER?" Figure when it is the actual kid calling it can't be TOO bad, right? :) Plus, we've been through this whole drill so it was no biggie. I already had the CAT scan and they knew my stone's vital signs and localities in my body so I could share the happy news. You'll be happy to know that "Fred" has not delayed my parents trip!
So then they pack up to send me home ... lots of papers to sign, lots of prescriptions to take home. Mike carefully guided my zig zag walking self to his (quite not rock-star parked) car. We stopped by Chik-fil-a for some grub and headed home via the pharmacy to drop off all my goods. Tis almost time to go pick up all those lovely pills, too. Yay!
Oh, and you'll be happy to know that after mucho liquids through both mouth and vein, "Fred" made his uneventful appearance into the world shortly after arriving home. Girls have it lucky in the kidney stone respect, our final tube from bladder to outside world is bigger than any other tube "Fred" had to travel. So now "Fred" is sitting in a plastic cup waiting to meet the Dr. on Thursday.
And I am going to roll back over and sleep off the one heck of a hangover you get from drugs this serious! For all the wonderfulness of how it helped before, now it's making me rather evil and yucky. Perhaps mocking Mike for his insane TV show choice of people being possessed will make me better. Mocking him usually does. :)
Hope your day was as fun as mine! ;) P.S. Doctor told me to stay home tomorrow to recover. I will be staring at the pretty colors on the ceiling and continuing to finish my round of happy pills to help with the residiual pain. (Think ... swallowing a dorito the wrong way. It's that kind of pain later on. Annoying as heck but definitely bearable!)
I didn't even cry when the nice nurse poked me! I did, however, through the thinly disguised veil of small talk, make sure that the girl from Harford Tech (local vo tech) was going NOWHERE near my person with that sharp pointy object. She didn't look any happier than I did with the thought of poking me, much to my satisfaction! First, they gave me "pain drugs light." More taste, less calories? Much like all things "light," (soda, Beer, sugary snacks) the light drugs didn't have quite the kick the deliverer promised. When they came in to ask how I was doing and could see me squirming on the (suprisingly comfortable) stretcher, they pumped up the juice! That was just about when Mike got there. I was so friendly! AND, I had the added bonus of there being 2 MIKES at once! Holy cow. That stuff was bizarre. The biggest head rush ever on the whole planet.
Once it was 10am, I decided to call my parents just for the information passing. Not that they could really do anything living on the other side of hte world. But I wanted ot mess with their (ok, her) head. The last time they were getting ready to go on vacation to San Diego, my brother got hurt and my mom went there. They were getting up early to leave for the rescheduled San Diego trip today. So I called and in my heavily slurred drugged up voice I said, "Remember the last time you were getting ready to go to S.D. and you got a phone call to let you know your kid was in the ER? I decided to not break with tradition!" Luckily, it's my mother so she just sighed and said "Oh, so you're in the ER?" Figure when it is the actual kid calling it can't be TOO bad, right? :) Plus, we've been through this whole drill so it was no biggie. I already had the CAT scan and they knew my stone's vital signs and localities in my body so I could share the happy news. You'll be happy to know that "Fred" has not delayed my parents trip!
So then they pack up to send me home ... lots of papers to sign, lots of prescriptions to take home. Mike carefully guided my zig zag walking self to his (quite not rock-star parked) car. We stopped by Chik-fil-a for some grub and headed home via the pharmacy to drop off all my goods. Tis almost time to go pick up all those lovely pills, too. Yay!
Oh, and you'll be happy to know that after mucho liquids through both mouth and vein, "Fred" made his uneventful appearance into the world shortly after arriving home. Girls have it lucky in the kidney stone respect, our final tube from bladder to outside world is bigger than any other tube "Fred" had to travel. So now "Fred" is sitting in a plastic cup waiting to meet the Dr. on Thursday.
And I am going to roll back over and sleep off the one heck of a hangover you get from drugs this serious! For all the wonderfulness of how it helped before, now it's making me rather evil and yucky. Perhaps mocking Mike for his insane TV show choice of people being possessed will make me better. Mocking him usually does. :)
Hope your day was as fun as mine! ;) P.S. Doctor told me to stay home tomorrow to recover. I will be staring at the pretty colors on the ceiling and continuing to finish my round of happy pills to help with the residiual pain. (Think ... swallowing a dorito the wrong way. It's that kind of pain later on. Annoying as heck but definitely bearable!)