Realizations...
So in the past year since I've graduated high school I've learned a few things...some lessons were good, others bad...
You can't always trust whom you want, and you don't always want who you trust.
Life can be a pain in the butt sometimes...really.
People will betray you, it's inevitable. Coming to that realisation has been the hardest thing of all. But perhaps my standards were too high. I wanted to believe everyone I knew had nothing but the best of intentions. I guess I was wrong.
I feel as if everyone I have loved has done me wrong in some way that is unforgivable, and I've tried to move past it, but seem to be unable to. Some of my best friends have treated me worse than the dirt on the ground they tread upon, and it hurts more than words will ever be able to express.
So thank you to the people who have been there for me, even when I pushed them away. You have my unending gratitude for the way you always accept my apologies. And for the new friends who have known me for so little time, yet treat me better than the ones I've known for a long time. I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
But despite all of this, I still cling like heck to what little beliefs I have left in the good of humanity. Every day those beliefs become more slippery in my hands, which ever try to grasp at them and yet somehow, can't seem to retain them as well as they wish. I refuse to submit to the jaded views of the pessimists who say this world is rot and there is no good left in the human race. I'm trying hard to continue believing good will prevail, and in the end humanity will prove the pessimists wrong.
But it's a losing battle, I fear.
You can't always trust whom you want, and you don't always want who you trust.
Life can be a pain in the butt sometimes...really.
People will betray you, it's inevitable. Coming to that realisation has been the hardest thing of all. But perhaps my standards were too high. I wanted to believe everyone I knew had nothing but the best of intentions. I guess I was wrong.
I feel as if everyone I have loved has done me wrong in some way that is unforgivable, and I've tried to move past it, but seem to be unable to. Some of my best friends have treated me worse than the dirt on the ground they tread upon, and it hurts more than words will ever be able to express.
So thank you to the people who have been there for me, even when I pushed them away. You have my unending gratitude for the way you always accept my apologies. And for the new friends who have known me for so little time, yet treat me better than the ones I've known for a long time. I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
But despite all of this, I still cling like heck to what little beliefs I have left in the good of humanity. Every day those beliefs become more slippery in my hands, which ever try to grasp at them and yet somehow, can't seem to retain them as well as they wish. I refuse to submit to the jaded views of the pessimists who say this world is rot and there is no good left in the human race. I'm trying hard to continue believing good will prevail, and in the end humanity will prove the pessimists wrong.
But it's a losing battle, I fear.