(no subject)
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I suck at life.
With that being said, how are you?
I had no fucking clue it would mean this much to me, seeing JF play for the last time before the move. No fucking clue. I feel so pissed off right now. I just want them all to die. Probably because i think about it too much.. i wanna be there so they can say goodbye to me, but then i realize how much it doesn't matter to them at all. They wont give two shits if i'm not there. If i were there, they'd probably be all nice and it would be a good show.. I hear they're playing an extended set. (and yes, i am keeping in mind what darren said, about how i mean nothing to them, except being a fan for tyhe music and nothing else) And what's more, i hate being so indescribably mad at Juli Folsom.. it's completely uncalled for that i'm mad at her, oh yea, that tacks on guilt. I shouldn't be this mad, she has every right to go to that show with other people and stay the night with friends.
And i really needed it this afternoon when mom was like "oh, well juli said they'd be back in july for more shows." i said "yea, MAYBE one or two, and those are big easy dates: 21+" Mom says "oh. well i guess they don't like you as much as you think they do." Mom says that kinda stuff alllll the fucking time. she KNOWS it's pissy and fucking annoying. It wouldn't be so bad, if we'd never actually fought about my life around bands and shit. She acts like she's just joking around, when really i just want her to shut the fuck up.
So what's the difference? I shouldn't be able to go to this show anyway. Besides, mom's right.
blah
blah.
I suck at life.
With that being said, how are you?
I had no fucking clue it would mean this much to me, seeing JF play for the last time before the move. No fucking clue. I feel so pissed off right now. I just want them all to die. Probably because i think about it too much.. i wanna be there so they can say goodbye to me, but then i realize how much it doesn't matter to them at all. They wont give two shits if i'm not there. If i were there, they'd probably be all nice and it would be a good show.. I hear they're playing an extended set. (and yes, i am keeping in mind what darren said, about how i mean nothing to them, except being a fan for tyhe music and nothing else) And what's more, i hate being so indescribably mad at Juli Folsom.. it's completely uncalled for that i'm mad at her, oh yea, that tacks on guilt. I shouldn't be this mad, she has every right to go to that show with other people and stay the night with friends.
And i really needed it this afternoon when mom was like "oh, well juli said they'd be back in july for more shows." i said "yea, MAYBE one or two, and those are big easy dates: 21+" Mom says "oh. well i guess they don't like you as much as you think they do." Mom says that kinda stuff alllll the fucking time. she KNOWS it's pissy and fucking annoying. It wouldn't be so bad, if we'd never actually fought about my life around bands and shit. She acts like she's just joking around, when really i just want her to shut the fuck up.
So what's the difference? I shouldn't be able to go to this show anyway. Besides, mom's right.