Fanfic: It begins in hell - Part 3
Title: "It begins in hell - Part 3"
Author: J.J.
Warning: It's an AU. It's unbetaed, it might look spoilerish and anyway it’s better if you’ve knowledge of the 8 episodes, it contain some Japanese words, some OOC...
Notes: I guess you can see it as a sequel of “A magic spell called ‘hope’”, a what if on how things could have gone had Battler and Sayo continued to live in that fragment.
Disclaimer:
"Umineko no naku koro ni" belong to Ryukishi07. I'm merely using his characters because I love them... especially Battler and Sayo...
Do I own something here? Oh yes, I own the plot and a sensible heart which would surely break if you give me harsh reviews... so please be honest but nice ok?
Summary: 1986. The family conference is about to start and Battler and his newlywed wife are about to take part to it.
The leisure pace at which the boat went caused them to reach Rokken-jima later than planned and, once there, they were welcomed by Gohda-san, one of the many servants working at the main house.
Sayo remembered him, even though he had started working on Rokken-jima only by some months before she left. He was… a very polished servant, very professional and very smooth in handling the people for which he was working. Nothing like what she had been.
Back then… Gohda-san hadn’t lost a single chance to make her notice the gap between them, he hadn’t hesitated in putting her in tight spots or pushing his work on her and even going so far as reproaching her no matter if it wasn’t his place as, even if she was younger than him in age, SHE was the senior worker in Rokken-jima. Yet she hadn’t been capable to handle that situation, allowing herself to be bullied by him, contenting herself with just playing him some innocent pranks under Beatrice’s identity, all the while feeling inferior to him and hating herself for this.
What was worse though, was that she still felt inferior she realized as she grasped Battler’s arm and sort of hid behind him even as Gohda-san greeted the two of them obsequiously.
Why should she feel like this? It wasn’t fair. Who cared if she hadn’t been a perfect servant? Now she wasn’t a servant anymore. She was free from that role, Shannon didn’t exist anymore, she was Sayo now. USHIROMIYA Sayo, wife to Ushiromiya Battler. That was who she was. Right? Right?
“…Hmmm, now that I think about it, I've been feeling all weird for a while and it must be that. I can't hear the cries of the seagulls,” Battler commented, startling her out from her thoughts. She looked around. It was true, the noisy birds were nowhere to be seen. Not that she missed them.
“The weather’s changing for worse. They’ve probably taken shelter…” she offered quietly.
“What's wrong, Battler-kun?” Rosa-san asked and Sayo instinctively tensed.
“Oh, Rosa Oba-san. …Nah, it's nothing really, I was just saying that since I can't hear the seagulls, it feels a bit lonely,” he replied calmly. She figured it was natural for him to talk so casually with his relatives. Or maybe it was just he didn’t know which horrible people they could be.
“…Uu-? Why no seagulls?” Maria-chan asked.
“Hmmm, maybe Jessica made all of them into Yakitori and ate them!” Battler said playfully, which caused Maria-chan to grow a little puzzled.
“The hell, don't say disturbing stuff like that! You'll get Maria all confused!!” Jessica protested, annoyed. Maria-chan though seemed to like the idea.
“Uu-uu-uu-! Jessica Onē-chan made them into Yakitori, made them into Yakitori! Uu-!!” she began repeating, sounding amused.
“I did not, I did not! Why the hell would I do something like that?!” Jessica denied heatedly but Maria-chan kept on repeating it and Battler played along with her like the big child it was. It was… fun to watch… nostalgic, as if they all were back on being kids… and Sayo found herself giggling as Jessica kept on complaining.
“That's not it, Maria-chan. It seems that wild birds are attuned to changes in the weather and atmospheric pressure. It looks like the weather will get worse around tonight. It's possible they hurried back to their nests,” George-san suggested.
“Uu-. Not Yakitori? Jessica Onē-chan didn't make them into Yakitori?” Maria-chan asked almost displeased.
“I did not, I did not!! I said, I wouldn't do stuff like that! Alright, Battler, you admit right now that you lied!”
“Battler-kun. Maria-chan is a naive girl, so she takes even jokes seriously. You should choose your jokes more carefully,” George-san scolded him.
Sayo frowned. Maria-chan was having fun. For her, Battler’s imaginative explanation had been much better than George-san’s mere truth. Besides they had to deal with everyone making fun of Battler though the entire trip so what there was of so terrible if now tables were reversed and Battler made fun of Jessica? Was it… was it because Battler was now her husband and therefore he somehow lost the right to make fun of others? Was he now less than the others due to being her husband? Was it her fault?
Battler though, obediently apologized as if it wasn’t a big deal. But it was. Why was he forbidden from making fun of others but the same didn’t apply to everyone else? It wasn’t fair…
Her face should have showed some of her hidden feelings because George-san felt he had to clarify his behaviour to her.
“As the older cousin I’ve to look after Battler-kun, Jessica-chan and Maria-chan. If I speak up, I do it in their best interest,” he told her in a serious tone.
“I wasn’t presuming…” she began uneasily, feeling as if he was scolding her as she held Battler’s arm tighter. Had she overstepped her boundaries? Was he about to remind her she was just a servant with no right to complain?
‘Servants should endeavour to only agree with their masters,’ Oku-sama had told her over and over… but she wasn’t a servant anymore, was she?
“I… I mean…” she stammered, unable to continue, unable to point out that George-san hadn’t scolded Jessica when she made fun of Battler but had joined in, taking amusement by it. It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair…
“Fine, fine, my bad, my bad, don’t scold Sayo-chan on my account,” Battler intruded in the conversation, his arm sliding out of her grasp and around her shoulders, gently pulling her closer to him, as if to shield her. “But you sure are good with children, Aniki. What about working in child-care instead than in a company?” he asked him, smoothly changing the topic. She wished she’d ever learnt how to do the same, she thought as she lowered her head. When she tried changing topic, it looked way too often like a pathetically obvious attempt.
“Yeah, George Nī-san, looks like it's what you were born to do!” Jessica agreed with Battler.
“Oh, no. Child-care is a fine job but it's not a job where merely liking children is enough,” George-san replied somewhat embarrassed.
“You're truly modest, George-kun, but Battler-kun is also quite good with children! Earlier, even if it was just for a time, Maria seemed to be having a lot of fun. I’m sure you’ll be a wonderful father in the future! So please, in the meantime keep on playing with Maria like you did just now, Battler-kun, okay? Just be careful of the jokes you make…” Rosa-san commented giggling as she.. winked at Battler. Sayo didn’t like that, but managed not to show it. Really, that woman had no shame. Or was she just being a tad too touchy? After all Rosa-san was Battler’s aunt and… and… she wouldn’t… not like Oyakata-sama had… but who was her to complain on what Oyakata-sama did when she as well was…
“Will do!” Battler agreed enthusiastically, apparently not thinking much of his aunt’s gesture, his voice chasing away her dark thoughts before the whole group started walking toward the main mansion. She felt him holding her a bit closer as they walked though, looking at her worriedly and so she managed a weak smile.
“I’m fine,” she assured as she followed the others alongside him.
Actually in order to reach the main house they had to climb a long stairway. Battler hadn’t let her carry her bag but had taken upon himself the duty to carry it through the way, along with his own. She figured it was a good thing they hadn’t carried big or very heavy luggage. In normal conditions it wouldn’t be like Battler to carry her bag also, but since he was worried for her, it was mandatory for him to spoil her. It was nice, she thought as they walked, his arm still around her shoulders, supporting her on the way as they closed the line of people moving toward the main house.
She… she had to stop worrying and thinking at herself as a servant, she told herself all over again. She was his wife now, she has to act properly and make him proud and…
“Want me to carry you as well?” Battler asked her and, even though he was smiling amusedly, she could feel how worried he was. She didn’t have the chance to reply as Jessica intruded in the conversation.
“Ah! As if you could! Stop trying to make the show off, don’t you remember how long this stair is?”
“Jessica-chan, I’m sure Battler-kun was only joking,” George-san told her. “There’s no way…”
“Physical strength is where I shine! I can prove it if you want,” Battler challenged.
“You don’t need to. I can assure you both he carried me for a way longer way and I swear I can walk just fine through this. So no embarrassing challenges, Battler? Please?” she asked him. He shrugged.
“Spoilsport,” he only commented but, at least, he didn’t push even though he continued to look at her worriedly.
She felt like sighing. She was worrying him. She knew. It’ll be a matter of time before the others would start noticing it as well, and commenting, complaining, reproaching, insulting and… and…
She almost missed a step and would have fallen had he not supported her. They had remained slightly behind and she hadn’t even noticed.
“You SURE you don’t want me to carry you?” he quietly asked her again and there was no joking tone in his voice this time and she found herself lowering her gaze. “And don’t even try telling me you’re fine.”
“I don’t want you to have to carry me in front of ‘them’,” she admitted in an equally quiet whisper then turned on him a pleading gaze. “Talk about something?”
“You worry too much on small things,” he chided her but then he just complied with her request, distracting her with chattering about his thoughts on a certain mystery book. It was distracting enough it almost allowed her to relax a bit as they kept on walking. He… had gotten good in finding stuffs to talk with when she wanted to hear his voice but wasn’t up for a conversation.
In the beginning, just after she had left Rokken-jima… it had been awkward.
She had managed to tell him she wanted the two of them to talk more but back then… she just wasn’t up to sustaining a conversation with a real person, too used at merely listening and nodding in agreement at people or at giving at them reports passively accepting to discuss whatever they wanted her to talk about the way they wanted her to talk to it, to be capable to hold a REAL conversation with him.
So he had been the one who had to do most of the talking though… as he did… he searched for things that would interest HER, not just him. He specifically asked her to stop him if he was talking of something she were to find boring. When she said she believed it would have been rude, he countered saying it would have been worse if she were to listen at him for hours as he yammered of something she found boring, while she pretended to be thrilled about it. It would be a waste of both their times, a deception… and wouldn’t have helped things at all.
Besides, he was a big boy and he could take an ‘I’m not interested in this’ just fine, he had assured.
At first, his request felt uncomfortable, as if he was trying to pressure her into voicing her opinion, but with time she understood he merely wanted to entertain her… and give her a chance to take part at the conversation if she were to wish to do so.
With time… it felt easier again to chat with him, exchange opinions, even argue. He fully stopped being ‘Battler-sama’, one of the Ushiromiya children, or ‘Battler-san’, and became just ‘Battler-kun’, the boy she spent almost all her time with. And then… he became simply ‘Battler’, her husband. The one who covered up for her when the world reminded her she was furniture. The one who would hold her when she believed she couldn’t sustain herself through her life any longer.
She let his words distract her, force her to think at something else that wasn’t how she was a furniture or how everyone was going to be horrible with her. It helped that they remained further behind from the group, unnoticed by them as Jessica and George-san began talking among them while the adults keep on tossing jabs at each other.
“We’ve remained behind,” she observed.
“Want us to speed up and reach them?” he offered.
“Not really. Maybe I’ve gotten so deep in magic that it penetrated into my soul so that people’s magic repelling toxin, repels me as well… maybe I shouldn’t stay among humans…” she found herself saying, only to look at him warily a second after. In the beginning he couldn’t stand to any type of talk about magic. Now he just smiled at her and shrugged.
“Nah, it’s just you let their words affect you too much,” he assured. “Words are just words. They’ve power over you only if you let them. Besides…” he trailed off as they finally finished climbing the stairs and the main mansion along with its beautiful rose garden came into view. He blinked as he looked around, forgetting whatever he was about to say. “I… I think I remember this… but… it has grown even bigger then it was in the past… hadn’t it?” he wondered. “It’s amazing…”
“Yes. It’s a magic place even if it was a nightmare to look after,” she commented bitterly in a low tone, gaze downcast as she clung at him. She had loved that garden and hated it as well. He turned his gaze on her, lowering slightly.
“Then it’s a good thing we’re here only to enjoy its view, isn’t it?” he reminded her in a low tone. “Though I remember you moving through it like a pretty butterfly,” he added, making her blush.
“N-no, I… I was more like a crawling caterpillar,” she stammered.
“Nah, that was Jessica,” he commented, his words catching his cousin’s ears.
“Uh? What are you talking about?” she inquired.
“Butterflies and rose infesting bugs,” he answered with a grin that implied it wasn’t as simple as his words were suggesting.
“What? What are you…” she began as he just laughed. Meanwhile Rosa-san and Kyrie-san were teasing Rudolf-san, comparing him to a rose that would go after insects like a carnivorous plant, leaving to Kyrie-san all the work to take care of them.
“ Rudolf Nī-san you’re a womanizer on the genetic level. I hope Battler-kun hadn’t caught up on you,” Rosa-san commented. “I seem to remember he too was popular with girls.”
“Actually all I care about is to be popular with a certain girl,” he assured, playing along even though she knew he was annoyed by this sort of comparisons. If there was a thing that Battler wanted in life, was to be a person different to his father in regard to how he handled women, especially his wife.
“And you’ve always done a wonderful work about it,” she told him softly so that he turned his smile on her.
“Learn by your son, Rudolf-san, that’s the behaviour to keep,” Kyrie-san in the meantime scolded her husband as she and Rosa-san proceeded to tease Rudolf-san more, Hideyoshi-san joining as well. Sayo wondered again if the Ushiromiya knew how to interact without teasing each other each five minutes.
“Ignore them,” Battler whispered in her ear. “Enjoy the view of the roses,” he suggested and she tried. But that place, more than any other, reminded her of the Golden Land and of her old self, her dreams and her pain and… and…
“…NON! What are you doing?”
She jumped at the sound of Gohda-san’s scolding voice, clinging to Battler’s arm, firmly believing the man was talking to her. He wasn’t, he was scolding another servant whom he had spotted running through the garden, but, maybe due to the fact she had been losing herself in distant memories, she had assumed the reproach was directed at her, that she was back on being a servant again, that marrying Battler had merely been a dream and that instead she was only… she was only… the world seemed to blur in front of her eyes, her knees growing weak as she tried to hold back her tears then… then the next she knew was that Battler had dropped their bags and picked her up effortlessly. She flushed as people stared at them… at her… and buried her face against him.
“Ba… Battler… I…” she tried to complain but from the glance he tossed at her she knew he wasn’t going to listen.
“Gohda-san, I hate to be a bother but can you please carry our bags?” he requested before turning to Jessica. “Jessica, where’s our room? Sayo-chan isn’t feeling well.” Jessica blinked in confusion.
“Ah… uh… in the guestroom…” she explained motioning to a building next to the main house as Gohda-san hurried to retrieve their bags, asking if he should also go call the doctor. She felt ashamed as she shook her head while continuing on keeping her face buried against Battler.
“She’s just tired,” Battler stated curly as he began to walk in quick strides in the direction Jessica had motioned.
“Hey, wait, you don’t even know where your room is!” Jessica protested running after tem. “I’ll show you the way!”
“Then hurry!” Battler countered as he didn’t bother waiting for her.
Sayo didn’t feel better once in the room assigned to them. Actually the world kept on spinning around her and she ended up retching in the bathroom, Battler supporting her as she emptied her stomach. Then… once done, she found herself seated on the floor with him, leaning against his chest as he rested a wet towel on her forehead.
“I’m sorry…” she whimpered. “I’m so sorry…”
“Hush… hush… calm down… it’s not your fault,” he assured.
“But everyone… everyone now… I’m so sorry, Battler…”
“Everyone else can go to hell for all I care. Don’t worry about them. It’s my fault. I shouldn’t have carried you here,” he admitted regretfully. He had the feeling Sayo-chan really didn’t want to return to Rokken-jima but, as she had insisted she would be fine, he hadn’t thought it would be so bad she would feel sick.
“I… I’m so sorry… I didn’t want to embarrass you… I…” Sayo stammered, eyes filling with tears as she misunderstood his words, assuming it meant he shouldn’t have carried there someone like her.
“Uh? What are you saying? Sayo-chan, I’m worried about you, not about them,” he clarified. “You didn’t feel like returning here and so I shouldn’t have carried you here. As soon as you’ll feel a little better I’ll go ask Krauss Oji-san if he can call back the boat and I’ll carry you back home,” he stated.
“No! No, I…” she tried to protest, raising her gaze and meeting his worried eyes. He… he wasn’t worried about how she had embarrassed him, he was really just worried for her and… and… and she had wanted so much instead to make him proud and… and… She rested her head on his chest. “I don’t want you to carry me back home, Battler…” she asked him quietly. She felt him stroking her hair gently.
“You don’t feel well here,” he pointed out. “You jump at any little thing and you’re so nervous you even ended up feeling sick.”
“It’s just…” she struggled to find words to explain it. “I wanted… I wanted to… to come here as your wife for so long. I’ve had this silly dream of how then I’ll be accepted in the family and everyone would be polite and nice with me and I’ll be like everyone else and… and… and everything would have been perfect and instead… instead I keep expecting people to remind me of my place, of telling me I don’t belong, that I’m just a servant who deluded herself and should rush wear her uniform and start cleaning if she doesn’t want to be scolded and… and how much of a fail I am as a maid and… and… Battler… I…” She clung to him, trembling slightly in effort to suppress tears. “I don’t want to be Shannon… I want to be the person you can be proud to present as your wife… and instead I’m making a mess of it and…”
“I’m proud of having you as my wife and I’m not afraid to declare it to the world,” he interrupted her in a soothing tone. “You know I didn’t marry you just to please Jī-chan or my family or only Kami-sama knows who, I married you because I wanted to marry you, no one else. I don’t regret my choice. And I don’t think less of you because you were a maid in the Ushiromiya house. It was a hard job and you did it while studying. You’re more praiseworthy than me who, at that age, only lazed out at school. And if someone thinks the contrary… he’s more than welcome to come up and try to tell that to my face and I’ll teach him to pay respect to my wife,” he assured and she found the corners of her lips sliding upward slightly. He had this gift of being able to… smoother everything, to reassure her no matter what he problem was, as if he just knew what to say to make her feel at ease, to make her forget any hardship she was going through, even if only for a moment.
“You… you can’t punch your relatives over me, Battler,” she reminded him, peeking up a him.
“Uh? Says who?” he asked, grinning down at her in an almost challenging tone. He really would be capable to get into a fight with his relatives for her. He really didn’t care if she had been a source of embarrassment, if she was a person unworthy of him. He really… loved her…
“Your wife says so,” she countered firmly.
“My wife’s a spoilsport,” he complained in a joking manner.
“Your wife loves you very, very much,” she stated, again resting her head against him.
“Same here. I love my wife very, very much,” he whispered quietly. “So let’s go back home,” he added and it was such a tempting perspective and yet…
“No. I don’t want to.”
“Sayo-chan…”
“You said so yourself. If you’re proud of me… whatever the others can say about me doesn’t matter, right? So… let’s stay,” she said even if she couldn’t help but cling to him a little.
“We can’t stay! You’re so scared of being here that this place makes you sick!” he protested exasperatedly. He simply couldn’t understand why she would want to do something that made her feel horrible.
“Then… protect me? I… I trust you to keep me safe, Battler,” she stated. “Even if I’m here.”
“Yes but… but you can’t keep on forcing yourself doing things you’re not ready to do. There’s no rush. You can take your time. We can return another time if you want and…”
“I… if I escape now… I don’t think I’ll ever manage to overcome this. I… I’ll keep on trying to escape this so… so…”
“I don’t think cornering yourself is a good strategy, you know? The boat will come if we call it now, but if we’ll wait the weather might get worse and it might be it won’t manage to come for quite a long time. And then… what if you want to leave?” he pointed out in a gentle tone. It was a bad habit of her, pretending everything was right and forcing herself in situations with no way out that she didn’t know how to handle, as if trapping herself in dead ends would be enough cause the apparition of a miraculous solution to whatever problem she was facing, with the only result she would sink into the darkest desperation when this didn’t happen.
She hesitated, she knew he was right, that being on Rokken-jima was being… simply too much for her. She was too scared of making a mistake, too uncomfortable, too haunted by the past to… to manage. The idea of leaving that room and facing Oku-sama made her shudder, the idea of having to sit at the table with all the Ushiromiya, in a position far from Battler that spoke of how low she was in their eyes… made her feel even worse. The idea of going back home was so tempting and yet…
“I… I can’t go back… it’s just… it’s too late… everyone would figure out we left because I was ashamed of myself, because I couldn’t keep up with them, because…”
“We’ll say I wanted to go back home, okay?” he offered.
“Who’ll believe it? And even if they were to believe it… it would be because they would think YOU were the one ashamed of me and…”
“I’m not ashamed of you!” he stated stubbornly ye firmly. “I’m never ashamed of you, Sayo-chan!”
“I know,” she confirmed with a weak smile. “And I know you don’t care what they think. But I…” she trailed off and he sighed as he held her tightly against himself.
“You can’t help but let their opinion get you. I’m an idiot. I should have refused coming back to Rokken-jima as soon as they asked me. I’m sorry, Sayo-chan,” he apologized. He should have known, he should have foresee this would have happened and stopped her from getting into such situation and instead…
“I was the one who insisted I could make it, wasn’t I? If I’d outright told you I didn’t think I could manage, you wouldn’t have considered coming here. I’m the one who should apologize… I’m always getting myself into troubles and expecting you to pull me out of them…” she admitted as she curled into his embrace. She… she wanted him to save her. To come at her rescue like a prince would for is princess.
“Well, it’s a fair exchange. I also count on you when I get myself into trouble,” he commented trying to lighten the mood. “So… since we can’t leave the island… what about at least leaving the floor and moving to sit on he bed?” he suggested. “You might even lie down a little and get some rest. It’ll probably do you some good.” She nodded and let him pick her up and carry her on the bed. He sat next to her as she lied down, stroking her hair until she finally felt asleep.
“Well? Aren’t Battler-kun and Sayo-chan going to join us?” Eva Nē-san asked Jessica-chan as soon as she joined them back.
“Battler said she’s tired and to just excuse them,” the girl replied a little uneasily.
“I might go pay her a visit just in case,” Nanjō Sensei offered motioning to stand up but Jessica-chan hurried to stop him.
“No, no, Battler said it’s not necessary, that she’s just tired and needs rest and to let her quiet,” she assured and Nanjō Sensei returned to sit down.
“If that’s the case… but please, make them sure it wouldn’t be a trouble for me to visit her,” the man recommended.
“Sure thing she’s frail. My, my, it would be a problem if she had inherited Natsuhi Nē-san’s weak health,” Eva Nē-san commented waving her fan as she tossed a meaningful glance at Natsuhi Nē-san.
“There’s no way that girl could have inherited something from me as we aren’t related,” Natsuhi Nē-san returned icily, giving away, in the way she saw ‘that girl’, how she thought low of Sayo-chan.
“Now, now, it could happen to everyone to feel a little overtired. No need to make a fuss over it,” Hideyoshi Nī-san mediated.
“Battler-kun could have joined us, though. It’s six years from the last time we’ve seen him,” Krauss Nī-san pointed out before sipping his tea.
“Ah, he said he preferred to remain with his wife just in case,” Jessica-chan explained.
“Sure is, your son pampers ‘his wife’ as if he believed he’d married a princess, Rudolf,” Eva Nē-san commented with a subtle jab to Sayo-chan’s previously low social status. “Shouldn’t you give him a little talk about what’s important to prioritize in life?”
“A wife’s duty is not to hold back her husband with her own health problems,” Natsuhi Nē-san commented coldly and a bit hypocritically considering how much of a troubles her headaches and inability to conceives had been for Krauss Nī-san.
“Natsuhi Nē-san, I would recommend not even mentioning this in front of Battler. He’s still not over Asumu’s death in the slightest,” Rudolf-san admitted hoping to avoid having his son embarrassing him. “And I’m willing to bet that’s why he fusses over Sayo-chan so much.”
It wasn’t a secret for anyone in the Ushiromiya family that Asumu-san, Rudolf-san’s first wife, died because she was so stupid she didn’t take proper care of her health, apparently in favour of focusing on her family, and that Battler-kun suffered from her death greatly and resented Rudolf-san for not having been as devoted to her as he believed Asumu-san had been to him.
“Well, it might make sense for him to consider her as a replacement to his mother figure,” Rosa-san observed. “Considering Rudolf Nī-san left him on his own.”
“Hey, hey, he is the one who left the family on his own!” Rudolf-san defended himself. “I tried to keep contact and he was the one who kept distance!”
“Still, Rudolf-san, I think you should have tried harder in regards to your son and that you shouldn’t have allowed him to make such a disgraceful marriage,” Natsuhi Nē-san stated. In the family, she seemed to be the one who disapproved of Battler-kun’s marriage the most. “Tainting Tōshu-sama’s blood by mixing it with the one of a low class orphaned girl of unknown origins… Battler-kun is too young and can’t realize what big of a mistake this is.”
“On this I agree with Natsuhi Nē-san,” Eva Nē-san commented and it was so unusual to have her and Natsuhi Nē-san agree on something that people stared at her almost in shock. “I can see Battler-kun cares for Sayo-chan but you don’t choose who to marry just due to something that can turn out to be a mere infatuation. You must choose with prudence a partner with a secure background and then you’ll start building up feelings for that person. Don’t I always say you that, George?” she asked shooting a glance to her son.
“Yes, Kā-san,” George-kun replied obediently. It wasn’t a secret he wasn’t thrilled with the person Eva Nē-san had chosen for him, and knowing him he shouldn’t like how the discussion was going, but apparently he knew better than intrude in a discussion between adults. That, or, Kyrie guessed, deep down he had his own reasons to be unhappy with Sayo-chan and Battler-kun’s marriage.
“If I can say a word,” Kyrie began politely. “I think Hisashi-san, Battler-kun’s grandfather, had allowed him to marry with Sayo-chan and at such a young age because he was keeping his grandson’s best interests in his mind, and therefore put great care in his choice.” She knew she had to choose her words carefully or they would end up being exchanged for lack of care for Battler-kun’s future, the words of a stepmother who didn’t mind if her stepson made a bad marriage.
“Well, considering Battler-kun had left the Ushiromiya and the Hisashi weren’t exactly a prestigious family as us, he might have seen nothing wrong at aiming a little low… but really, Sayo-chan is way too low, even for the Hisashi,” Eva Nē-san observed. “A nobody’s daughter who had worked as a maid…”
“Honestly I think Hisashi-san couldn’t care less about her origins… He was a romantic. All he wanted for Battler-kun was a wife who would love and support his grandson when he wouldn’t be around to protect him anymore,” she clarified. “He had two years to observe Sayo-chan and see how she and Battler-kun interacted and then he made his choice. He could see she loved Battler-kun for who he was, that she knew how to support him in troubled times, that she was serious and modest and that she wasn’t interested in Battler-kun for his fancy family name or his money,” she pointed out. “Yes, she’s an orphan, which probably allows her to better understand Battler-kun’s pain for losing… his mother figure at such a young age…” she couldn’t help but make a pause before mentioning what Battler-kun lost, “…and made easier for her to support him when Hisashi-san passed away,” she went on. “She has lived in the Hisashi house for two years and knows its rules and how it works. She’s unpretentious, not scared of working hard and doesn’t dream of luxurious things. She doesn’t just blindly love Battler-kun but also shares with him the same interests and has a good chemistry with him. Battler-kun loves her and her presence helps him to improve himself. Really, for a man like Hisashi-san, who didn’t aim to have his grandson make a business profitable marriage but was seriously invested into giving him the happiest marriage possible, Sayo-chan must have looked like the perfect choice. And I can testify that, so far, they’re having a very happy marriage.”
“Well, there’s no denying they’re very cute together and Battler-kun does his best to take care of her…” Rosa-san said in a mix between longing and bitterness.
“Still, I think someone with Battler-kun’s looks and background might have picked up better. Really, Rudolf, you should have stopped that marriage from taking place… or, at least, you shouldn’t have allowed Battler-kun to register Sayo-chan also into the Ushiromiya family register. Maybe she could be an acceptable wife for Hisashi Battler but for Ushiromiya Battler…” Eva Nē-san shook her head in disapprobation. “Really, you never took marriage seriously.”
“As if Hisashi-san or Battler would listen me. Battler would have more likely remained a Hisashi than give up on Sayo-chan,” Rudolf-san said with a shrug. “For him the Ushiromiya name had never mattered much, after all… and I’ve to admit Sayo-chan isn’t so bad with him.”
“Yes, yes, they don’t seem so bad together,” Hideyoshi Nī-san agreed. “Eva, you shouldn’t butt in so rudely into other families business. If Battler-kun is happy then it’s all right.”
“Natsuhi, you too. Though I can’t say I approve of Battler-kun’s choice, what’s done is done,” Krauss Nī-san added.
“I still think someone should care about Battler-kun’s future. You’re being too dismissive of the whole matter but would you feel the same if this had happened to Jessica?” his wife insisted. In her own stern way she cared for Battler-kun… almost as much as she disliked Sayo-chan.
“I’m perfectly capable to care for my future on my own,” Jessica-chan grumbled under her breath and Natsuhi Nē-san glared at her.
“I think it’s too early to judge if Battler-kun’s marriage is a good one or not. After all they’re both too young. Let’s see which future they’ll try to build together before giving judgment. If it were to turn out Sayo-chan doesn’t know how to properly take care of her husband and disappoint Battler-kun… then it’s not like she’ll have the weapons to complain if she were to end up being erased from the family register,” Kyrie observed with a shrug. “But I’m pretty sure we won’t get to this. Also, I’m fearing with all our talking we’re boring the kids to death. George-kun, Jessica-chan, Maria-chan, if you’ve finished your tea why don’t you get a break from this boring adult discussion and find something fun to do?” Her suggestion was welcomed with poorly masked enthusiasm as the kids hurried to catch their chance to leave, Jessica-chan and Maria-chan literally running out while George-kun, at least, left in a bit more composed manner.
Kyrie smiled as they left, then turned on Natsuhi Nē-san.
“There’s to say Jessica-chan has grown up into a beautiful young woman, filled with spirit and confidence. I’m sure it’s thanks to your hard work and guidance, Natsuhi Nē-san,” she observed in a honest tone.
“Yes, time in which girls had to act all demure and proper had finished long ago, hadn’t it, Nī-san?” Eva Nē-san commented, knowing fully well how Krauss Nī-san thought the exact opposite. “It’s time for them to spread their wings and choose their future and I could see Jessica-chan is planning to do exactly this,” she added. Kyrie seated herself more comfortably. She knew that Eva Nē-san wouldn’t have missed Jessica-chan’s grumbled words and be more than willing to forget criticising Battler-kun’s marriage if given the chance to indulge in her favourite hobby, making remarks on Krauss Nī-san and Natsuhi Nē-san’s poor parenting skill.
Really, maybe they shouldn’t have asked Battler-kun and Sayo-chan if they wanted to come with them on Rokken-jima, especially considering the delicate situation they were in. On the other side Eva Nē-san had insisted with Rudolf-san about taking them along, thinking she could use the newlywed presence as an excuse to demand for Otō-san to show up so as to pressure Krauss Nī-san and Natsuhi Nē-san to admit he was dead and they had kept it hidden or to give in into their demands.
Kyrie didn’t really see it as a winning strategy and had, quite frankly, warned against it. Actually it offered to Krauss Nī-san the excuse to claim Otō-san wouldn’t show up because upset due to Battler-kun’s marriage. Rudolf-san and Eva Nē-san though, had stated that this too would work in their favour. If Kinzō-san were to find Battler-kun’s marriage such a grave sin against the Ushiromiya… well, he wouldn’t lose the chance to scold him himself. Just closing himself in his study… this would be a way too tame reaction for Kinzō-san.
Well, after all it was the way too tame reaction he ‘had’ the past time when he apparently ‘heard’ them bitching over money that strengthened in them the belief he was already dead. Kinzō-san wasn’t the man to just quietly close himself in his study when angry, he was more likely to give verbal if not physical abuse to whoever were to upset him.
Still… this strategy meant to involve Battler-kun, to use him as a pawn in that squabble between siblings. If Battler-kun had merely been Asumu-san’s son as she had believed for 18 years, she would have had no hesitations in using him. For 18 years she had resented his whole existence as a constant memory that her own son had died and Asumu-san’s child had survived. But after Battler-kun had married, Rudolf-san had told her the truth and she… she still didn’t know how to cope with it. She was too deep into her obsession for Rudolf-san to be capable to give up on him, to accept he had used her and Asumu-san as he pleased, that he had toyed with the life of his own child, lying to the three of them for his own sake.
And on the other side there was Battler-kun, raised by Asumu-san and her family to be the exact opposite of his father. A gentle and selfless child that loved his wife and did his best to take care of her. A gentle and selfless child who didn’t resent her or Ange even if he knew she was the one with whom his father was cheating the woman he believed was his mother and that he adored.
In a way Kyrie saw this as another battle she had lost against Asumu-san. If she had been in her place… she wouldn’t have raised Battler-kun to be so gentle and accepting. If she had raised him… she would have made sure he would have hated Asumu-san and Asumu-san’s kid and would have fought them with all he could… especially if she were to suspect Rudolf-san might have switched the babies. If she’d been in Asumu-san’s place… she would have made sure Battler-kun would have never felt nothing else but hate for Asumu-san, even if she were her true mother. This would have been her revenge.
Asumu-san instead… had adopted another strategy. Instead than focusing on using Battler-kun against Kyrie… she had given her all to be the best mother possible for him. The fact she hadn’t felt the need to instruct Battler-kun to hate her… felt like a smack in Kyrie’s face. Asumu-san had been so confident in her place in Rudolf-san’s heart, in Battler-kun’s heart… she hadn’t needed to make sure he would hate her rival.
Kyrie couldn’t replace Asumu-san in Battler-kun’s eyes… and this wasn’t because he hated her but simply because Asumu-san to him was simply too important, too special, too perfect. Even if he were to be told the truth… Asumu-san would still be the woman he would recognize as his mother, the one who had raised him with love and care despite him not being her child while Kyrie would just be… his biological gene donor or something like that. Nothing more.
If only Asumu-san had raised Battler-kun to hate her rival… despite Kyrie being his true mother… Kyrie could have hoped that, once learnt the truth, Battler-kun could have been disgusted by Asumu-san’s behaviour. Like this though… even if Battler-kun were to know the truth… Asumu-san would still win.
For Kyrie to finally beat her… to finally get rid of her ghost… she couldn’t content herself with just being Rudolf-san’s only partner. She would also have to prove she was the best mother also. The best mother for Ange… and the best mother for Battler-kun.
And then…
…she’ll be…
…finally free.
JJ's Extra Notes:
Nobody knows who was Asumu’s family name so I had to make it up. I’ve picked Hisashi up. It’s not canon though.
Also yes, Rudolf told Kyrie the truth. She didn’t kill him but that’s why she’s trying to be nicer with Battler… although for her this is also in order to try and beat Asumu up. In her place I’ll beat Rudolf up but well… she simply can’t let him go.
Dictionary:
-chan: Name ending used to express affection and familiarity or to talk with a child
-kun: Young
-jima: Island
-sama: "Lord" or "Lady"
-san: "Mr." or "Mrs."
Aniki: "Brother" or "Older boy"
Jī-chan: "Grandfather" or "Old man"
Kami: "God"
Kā-san: "Mother"
Nē-san: "Sister" or "Older girl"
Nī-san: "Brother" or "Older boy"
Oba-san: "Aunt" or "Woman"
Oji-san: "Uncle" or "Man"
Oku-sama: "Wife" or "Married lady" or "Madam"
Onē-chan: "Sister" or "Older girl"
Otō-san: "Father"
Oyakata:
"Master of the house" or "Lord"
Sensei: "Doctor"
Tōshu: "Family head"
Yakitori: "Grilled chicken"
Don't grumble silently, please let me know what you're thinking of this!
Send me your comments!
Author: J.J.
Warning: It's an AU. It's unbetaed, it might look spoilerish and anyway it’s better if you’ve knowledge of the 8 episodes, it contain some Japanese words, some OOC...
Notes: I guess you can see it as a sequel of “A magic spell called ‘hope’”, a what if on how things could have gone had Battler and Sayo continued to live in that fragment.
Disclaimer:
"Umineko no naku koro ni" belong to Ryukishi07. I'm merely using his characters because I love them... especially Battler and Sayo...
Do I own something here? Oh yes, I own the plot and a sensible heart which would surely break if you give me harsh reviews... so please be honest but nice ok?
Summary: 1986. The family conference is about to start and Battler and his newlywed wife are about to take part to it.
The leisure pace at which the boat went caused them to reach Rokken-jima later than planned and, once there, they were welcomed by Gohda-san, one of the many servants working at the main house.
Sayo remembered him, even though he had started working on Rokken-jima only by some months before she left. He was… a very polished servant, very professional and very smooth in handling the people for which he was working. Nothing like what she had been.
Back then… Gohda-san hadn’t lost a single chance to make her notice the gap between them, he hadn’t hesitated in putting her in tight spots or pushing his work on her and even going so far as reproaching her no matter if it wasn’t his place as, even if she was younger than him in age, SHE was the senior worker in Rokken-jima. Yet she hadn’t been capable to handle that situation, allowing herself to be bullied by him, contenting herself with just playing him some innocent pranks under Beatrice’s identity, all the while feeling inferior to him and hating herself for this.
What was worse though, was that she still felt inferior she realized as she grasped Battler’s arm and sort of hid behind him even as Gohda-san greeted the two of them obsequiously.
Why should she feel like this? It wasn’t fair. Who cared if she hadn’t been a perfect servant? Now she wasn’t a servant anymore. She was free from that role, Shannon didn’t exist anymore, she was Sayo now. USHIROMIYA Sayo, wife to Ushiromiya Battler. That was who she was. Right? Right?
“…Hmmm, now that I think about it, I've been feeling all weird for a while and it must be that. I can't hear the cries of the seagulls,” Battler commented, startling her out from her thoughts. She looked around. It was true, the noisy birds were nowhere to be seen. Not that she missed them.
“The weather’s changing for worse. They’ve probably taken shelter…” she offered quietly.
“What's wrong, Battler-kun?” Rosa-san asked and Sayo instinctively tensed.
“Oh, Rosa Oba-san. …Nah, it's nothing really, I was just saying that since I can't hear the seagulls, it feels a bit lonely,” he replied calmly. She figured it was natural for him to talk so casually with his relatives. Or maybe it was just he didn’t know which horrible people they could be.
“…Uu-? Why no seagulls?” Maria-chan asked.
“Hmmm, maybe Jessica made all of them into Yakitori and ate them!” Battler said playfully, which caused Maria-chan to grow a little puzzled.
“The hell, don't say disturbing stuff like that! You'll get Maria all confused!!” Jessica protested, annoyed. Maria-chan though seemed to like the idea.
“Uu-uu-uu-! Jessica Onē-chan made them into Yakitori, made them into Yakitori! Uu-!!” she began repeating, sounding amused.
“I did not, I did not! Why the hell would I do something like that?!” Jessica denied heatedly but Maria-chan kept on repeating it and Battler played along with her like the big child it was. It was… fun to watch… nostalgic, as if they all were back on being kids… and Sayo found herself giggling as Jessica kept on complaining.
“That's not it, Maria-chan. It seems that wild birds are attuned to changes in the weather and atmospheric pressure. It looks like the weather will get worse around tonight. It's possible they hurried back to their nests,” George-san suggested.
“Uu-. Not Yakitori? Jessica Onē-chan didn't make them into Yakitori?” Maria-chan asked almost displeased.
“I did not, I did not!! I said, I wouldn't do stuff like that! Alright, Battler, you admit right now that you lied!”
“Battler-kun. Maria-chan is a naive girl, so she takes even jokes seriously. You should choose your jokes more carefully,” George-san scolded him.
Sayo frowned. Maria-chan was having fun. For her, Battler’s imaginative explanation had been much better than George-san’s mere truth. Besides they had to deal with everyone making fun of Battler though the entire trip so what there was of so terrible if now tables were reversed and Battler made fun of Jessica? Was it… was it because Battler was now her husband and therefore he somehow lost the right to make fun of others? Was he now less than the others due to being her husband? Was it her fault?
Battler though, obediently apologized as if it wasn’t a big deal. But it was. Why was he forbidden from making fun of others but the same didn’t apply to everyone else? It wasn’t fair…
Her face should have showed some of her hidden feelings because George-san felt he had to clarify his behaviour to her.
“As the older cousin I’ve to look after Battler-kun, Jessica-chan and Maria-chan. If I speak up, I do it in their best interest,” he told her in a serious tone.
“I wasn’t presuming…” she began uneasily, feeling as if he was scolding her as she held Battler’s arm tighter. Had she overstepped her boundaries? Was he about to remind her she was just a servant with no right to complain?
‘Servants should endeavour to only agree with their masters,’ Oku-sama had told her over and over… but she wasn’t a servant anymore, was she?
“I… I mean…” she stammered, unable to continue, unable to point out that George-san hadn’t scolded Jessica when she made fun of Battler but had joined in, taking amusement by it. It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair…
“Fine, fine, my bad, my bad, don’t scold Sayo-chan on my account,” Battler intruded in the conversation, his arm sliding out of her grasp and around her shoulders, gently pulling her closer to him, as if to shield her. “But you sure are good with children, Aniki. What about working in child-care instead than in a company?” he asked him, smoothly changing the topic. She wished she’d ever learnt how to do the same, she thought as she lowered her head. When she tried changing topic, it looked way too often like a pathetically obvious attempt.
“Yeah, George Nī-san, looks like it's what you were born to do!” Jessica agreed with Battler.
“Oh, no. Child-care is a fine job but it's not a job where merely liking children is enough,” George-san replied somewhat embarrassed.
“You're truly modest, George-kun, but Battler-kun is also quite good with children! Earlier, even if it was just for a time, Maria seemed to be having a lot of fun. I’m sure you’ll be a wonderful father in the future! So please, in the meantime keep on playing with Maria like you did just now, Battler-kun, okay? Just be careful of the jokes you make…” Rosa-san commented giggling as she.. winked at Battler. Sayo didn’t like that, but managed not to show it. Really, that woman had no shame. Or was she just being a tad too touchy? After all Rosa-san was Battler’s aunt and… and… she wouldn’t… not like Oyakata-sama had… but who was her to complain on what Oyakata-sama did when she as well was…
“Will do!” Battler agreed enthusiastically, apparently not thinking much of his aunt’s gesture, his voice chasing away her dark thoughts before the whole group started walking toward the main mansion. She felt him holding her a bit closer as they walked though, looking at her worriedly and so she managed a weak smile.
“I’m fine,” she assured as she followed the others alongside him.
Actually in order to reach the main house they had to climb a long stairway. Battler hadn’t let her carry her bag but had taken upon himself the duty to carry it through the way, along with his own. She figured it was a good thing they hadn’t carried big or very heavy luggage. In normal conditions it wouldn’t be like Battler to carry her bag also, but since he was worried for her, it was mandatory for him to spoil her. It was nice, she thought as they walked, his arm still around her shoulders, supporting her on the way as they closed the line of people moving toward the main house.
She… she had to stop worrying and thinking at herself as a servant, she told herself all over again. She was his wife now, she has to act properly and make him proud and…
“Want me to carry you as well?” Battler asked her and, even though he was smiling amusedly, she could feel how worried he was. She didn’t have the chance to reply as Jessica intruded in the conversation.
“Ah! As if you could! Stop trying to make the show off, don’t you remember how long this stair is?”
“Jessica-chan, I’m sure Battler-kun was only joking,” George-san told her. “There’s no way…”
“Physical strength is where I shine! I can prove it if you want,” Battler challenged.
“You don’t need to. I can assure you both he carried me for a way longer way and I swear I can walk just fine through this. So no embarrassing challenges, Battler? Please?” she asked him. He shrugged.
“Spoilsport,” he only commented but, at least, he didn’t push even though he continued to look at her worriedly.
She felt like sighing. She was worrying him. She knew. It’ll be a matter of time before the others would start noticing it as well, and commenting, complaining, reproaching, insulting and… and…
She almost missed a step and would have fallen had he not supported her. They had remained slightly behind and she hadn’t even noticed.
“You SURE you don’t want me to carry you?” he quietly asked her again and there was no joking tone in his voice this time and she found herself lowering her gaze. “And don’t even try telling me you’re fine.”
“I don’t want you to have to carry me in front of ‘them’,” she admitted in an equally quiet whisper then turned on him a pleading gaze. “Talk about something?”
“You worry too much on small things,” he chided her but then he just complied with her request, distracting her with chattering about his thoughts on a certain mystery book. It was distracting enough it almost allowed her to relax a bit as they kept on walking. He… had gotten good in finding stuffs to talk with when she wanted to hear his voice but wasn’t up for a conversation.
In the beginning, just after she had left Rokken-jima… it had been awkward.
She had managed to tell him she wanted the two of them to talk more but back then… she just wasn’t up to sustaining a conversation with a real person, too used at merely listening and nodding in agreement at people or at giving at them reports passively accepting to discuss whatever they wanted her to talk about the way they wanted her to talk to it, to be capable to hold a REAL conversation with him.
So he had been the one who had to do most of the talking though… as he did… he searched for things that would interest HER, not just him. He specifically asked her to stop him if he was talking of something she were to find boring. When she said she believed it would have been rude, he countered saying it would have been worse if she were to listen at him for hours as he yammered of something she found boring, while she pretended to be thrilled about it. It would be a waste of both their times, a deception… and wouldn’t have helped things at all.
Besides, he was a big boy and he could take an ‘I’m not interested in this’ just fine, he had assured.
At first, his request felt uncomfortable, as if he was trying to pressure her into voicing her opinion, but with time she understood he merely wanted to entertain her… and give her a chance to take part at the conversation if she were to wish to do so.
With time… it felt easier again to chat with him, exchange opinions, even argue. He fully stopped being ‘Battler-sama’, one of the Ushiromiya children, or ‘Battler-san’, and became just ‘Battler-kun’, the boy she spent almost all her time with. And then… he became simply ‘Battler’, her husband. The one who covered up for her when the world reminded her she was furniture. The one who would hold her when she believed she couldn’t sustain herself through her life any longer.
She let his words distract her, force her to think at something else that wasn’t how she was a furniture or how everyone was going to be horrible with her. It helped that they remained further behind from the group, unnoticed by them as Jessica and George-san began talking among them while the adults keep on tossing jabs at each other.
“We’ve remained behind,” she observed.
“Want us to speed up and reach them?” he offered.
“Not really. Maybe I’ve gotten so deep in magic that it penetrated into my soul so that people’s magic repelling toxin, repels me as well… maybe I shouldn’t stay among humans…” she found herself saying, only to look at him warily a second after. In the beginning he couldn’t stand to any type of talk about magic. Now he just smiled at her and shrugged.
“Nah, it’s just you let their words affect you too much,” he assured. “Words are just words. They’ve power over you only if you let them. Besides…” he trailed off as they finally finished climbing the stairs and the main mansion along with its beautiful rose garden came into view. He blinked as he looked around, forgetting whatever he was about to say. “I… I think I remember this… but… it has grown even bigger then it was in the past… hadn’t it?” he wondered. “It’s amazing…”
“Yes. It’s a magic place even if it was a nightmare to look after,” she commented bitterly in a low tone, gaze downcast as she clung at him. She had loved that garden and hated it as well. He turned his gaze on her, lowering slightly.
“Then it’s a good thing we’re here only to enjoy its view, isn’t it?” he reminded her in a low tone. “Though I remember you moving through it like a pretty butterfly,” he added, making her blush.
“N-no, I… I was more like a crawling caterpillar,” she stammered.
“Nah, that was Jessica,” he commented, his words catching his cousin’s ears.
“Uh? What are you talking about?” she inquired.
“Butterflies and rose infesting bugs,” he answered with a grin that implied it wasn’t as simple as his words were suggesting.
“What? What are you…” she began as he just laughed. Meanwhile Rosa-san and Kyrie-san were teasing Rudolf-san, comparing him to a rose that would go after insects like a carnivorous plant, leaving to Kyrie-san all the work to take care of them.
“ Rudolf Nī-san you’re a womanizer on the genetic level. I hope Battler-kun hadn’t caught up on you,” Rosa-san commented. “I seem to remember he too was popular with girls.”
“Actually all I care about is to be popular with a certain girl,” he assured, playing along even though she knew he was annoyed by this sort of comparisons. If there was a thing that Battler wanted in life, was to be a person different to his father in regard to how he handled women, especially his wife.
“And you’ve always done a wonderful work about it,” she told him softly so that he turned his smile on her.
“Learn by your son, Rudolf-san, that’s the behaviour to keep,” Kyrie-san in the meantime scolded her husband as she and Rosa-san proceeded to tease Rudolf-san more, Hideyoshi-san joining as well. Sayo wondered again if the Ushiromiya knew how to interact without teasing each other each five minutes.
“Ignore them,” Battler whispered in her ear. “Enjoy the view of the roses,” he suggested and she tried. But that place, more than any other, reminded her of the Golden Land and of her old self, her dreams and her pain and… and…
“…NON! What are you doing?”
She jumped at the sound of Gohda-san’s scolding voice, clinging to Battler’s arm, firmly believing the man was talking to her. He wasn’t, he was scolding another servant whom he had spotted running through the garden, but, maybe due to the fact she had been losing herself in distant memories, she had assumed the reproach was directed at her, that she was back on being a servant again, that marrying Battler had merely been a dream and that instead she was only… she was only… the world seemed to blur in front of her eyes, her knees growing weak as she tried to hold back her tears then… then the next she knew was that Battler had dropped their bags and picked her up effortlessly. She flushed as people stared at them… at her… and buried her face against him.
“Ba… Battler… I…” she tried to complain but from the glance he tossed at her she knew he wasn’t going to listen.
“Gohda-san, I hate to be a bother but can you please carry our bags?” he requested before turning to Jessica. “Jessica, where’s our room? Sayo-chan isn’t feeling well.” Jessica blinked in confusion.
“Ah… uh… in the guestroom…” she explained motioning to a building next to the main house as Gohda-san hurried to retrieve their bags, asking if he should also go call the doctor. She felt ashamed as she shook her head while continuing on keeping her face buried against Battler.
“She’s just tired,” Battler stated curly as he began to walk in quick strides in the direction Jessica had motioned.
“Hey, wait, you don’t even know where your room is!” Jessica protested running after tem. “I’ll show you the way!”
“Then hurry!” Battler countered as he didn’t bother waiting for her.
Sayo didn’t feel better once in the room assigned to them. Actually the world kept on spinning around her and she ended up retching in the bathroom, Battler supporting her as she emptied her stomach. Then… once done, she found herself seated on the floor with him, leaning against his chest as he rested a wet towel on her forehead.
“I’m sorry…” she whimpered. “I’m so sorry…”
“Hush… hush… calm down… it’s not your fault,” he assured.
“But everyone… everyone now… I’m so sorry, Battler…”
“Everyone else can go to hell for all I care. Don’t worry about them. It’s my fault. I shouldn’t have carried you here,” he admitted regretfully. He had the feeling Sayo-chan really didn’t want to return to Rokken-jima but, as she had insisted she would be fine, he hadn’t thought it would be so bad she would feel sick.
“I… I’m so sorry… I didn’t want to embarrass you… I…” Sayo stammered, eyes filling with tears as she misunderstood his words, assuming it meant he shouldn’t have carried there someone like her.
“Uh? What are you saying? Sayo-chan, I’m worried about you, not about them,” he clarified. “You didn’t feel like returning here and so I shouldn’t have carried you here. As soon as you’ll feel a little better I’ll go ask Krauss Oji-san if he can call back the boat and I’ll carry you back home,” he stated.
“No! No, I…” she tried to protest, raising her gaze and meeting his worried eyes. He… he wasn’t worried about how she had embarrassed him, he was really just worried for her and… and… and she had wanted so much instead to make him proud and… and… She rested her head on his chest. “I don’t want you to carry me back home, Battler…” she asked him quietly. She felt him stroking her hair gently.
“You don’t feel well here,” he pointed out. “You jump at any little thing and you’re so nervous you even ended up feeling sick.”
“It’s just…” she struggled to find words to explain it. “I wanted… I wanted to… to come here as your wife for so long. I’ve had this silly dream of how then I’ll be accepted in the family and everyone would be polite and nice with me and I’ll be like everyone else and… and… and everything would have been perfect and instead… instead I keep expecting people to remind me of my place, of telling me I don’t belong, that I’m just a servant who deluded herself and should rush wear her uniform and start cleaning if she doesn’t want to be scolded and… and how much of a fail I am as a maid and… and… Battler… I…” She clung to him, trembling slightly in effort to suppress tears. “I don’t want to be Shannon… I want to be the person you can be proud to present as your wife… and instead I’m making a mess of it and…”
“I’m proud of having you as my wife and I’m not afraid to declare it to the world,” he interrupted her in a soothing tone. “You know I didn’t marry you just to please Jī-chan or my family or only Kami-sama knows who, I married you because I wanted to marry you, no one else. I don’t regret my choice. And I don’t think less of you because you were a maid in the Ushiromiya house. It was a hard job and you did it while studying. You’re more praiseworthy than me who, at that age, only lazed out at school. And if someone thinks the contrary… he’s more than welcome to come up and try to tell that to my face and I’ll teach him to pay respect to my wife,” he assured and she found the corners of her lips sliding upward slightly. He had this gift of being able to… smoother everything, to reassure her no matter what he problem was, as if he just knew what to say to make her feel at ease, to make her forget any hardship she was going through, even if only for a moment.
“You… you can’t punch your relatives over me, Battler,” she reminded him, peeking up a him.
“Uh? Says who?” he asked, grinning down at her in an almost challenging tone. He really would be capable to get into a fight with his relatives for her. He really didn’t care if she had been a source of embarrassment, if she was a person unworthy of him. He really… loved her…
“Your wife says so,” she countered firmly.
“My wife’s a spoilsport,” he complained in a joking manner.
“Your wife loves you very, very much,” she stated, again resting her head against him.
“Same here. I love my wife very, very much,” he whispered quietly. “So let’s go back home,” he added and it was such a tempting perspective and yet…
“No. I don’t want to.”
“Sayo-chan…”
“You said so yourself. If you’re proud of me… whatever the others can say about me doesn’t matter, right? So… let’s stay,” she said even if she couldn’t help but cling to him a little.
“We can’t stay! You’re so scared of being here that this place makes you sick!” he protested exasperatedly. He simply couldn’t understand why she would want to do something that made her feel horrible.
“Then… protect me? I… I trust you to keep me safe, Battler,” she stated. “Even if I’m here.”
“Yes but… but you can’t keep on forcing yourself doing things you’re not ready to do. There’s no rush. You can take your time. We can return another time if you want and…”
“I… if I escape now… I don’t think I’ll ever manage to overcome this. I… I’ll keep on trying to escape this so… so…”
“I don’t think cornering yourself is a good strategy, you know? The boat will come if we call it now, but if we’ll wait the weather might get worse and it might be it won’t manage to come for quite a long time. And then… what if you want to leave?” he pointed out in a gentle tone. It was a bad habit of her, pretending everything was right and forcing herself in situations with no way out that she didn’t know how to handle, as if trapping herself in dead ends would be enough cause the apparition of a miraculous solution to whatever problem she was facing, with the only result she would sink into the darkest desperation when this didn’t happen.
She hesitated, she knew he was right, that being on Rokken-jima was being… simply too much for her. She was too scared of making a mistake, too uncomfortable, too haunted by the past to… to manage. The idea of leaving that room and facing Oku-sama made her shudder, the idea of having to sit at the table with all the Ushiromiya, in a position far from Battler that spoke of how low she was in their eyes… made her feel even worse. The idea of going back home was so tempting and yet…
“I… I can’t go back… it’s just… it’s too late… everyone would figure out we left because I was ashamed of myself, because I couldn’t keep up with them, because…”
“We’ll say I wanted to go back home, okay?” he offered.
“Who’ll believe it? And even if they were to believe it… it would be because they would think YOU were the one ashamed of me and…”
“I’m not ashamed of you!” he stated stubbornly ye firmly. “I’m never ashamed of you, Sayo-chan!”
“I know,” she confirmed with a weak smile. “And I know you don’t care what they think. But I…” she trailed off and he sighed as he held her tightly against himself.
“You can’t help but let their opinion get you. I’m an idiot. I should have refused coming back to Rokken-jima as soon as they asked me. I’m sorry, Sayo-chan,” he apologized. He should have known, he should have foresee this would have happened and stopped her from getting into such situation and instead…
“I was the one who insisted I could make it, wasn’t I? If I’d outright told you I didn’t think I could manage, you wouldn’t have considered coming here. I’m the one who should apologize… I’m always getting myself into troubles and expecting you to pull me out of them…” she admitted as she curled into his embrace. She… she wanted him to save her. To come at her rescue like a prince would for is princess.
“Well, it’s a fair exchange. I also count on you when I get myself into trouble,” he commented trying to lighten the mood. “So… since we can’t leave the island… what about at least leaving the floor and moving to sit on he bed?” he suggested. “You might even lie down a little and get some rest. It’ll probably do you some good.” She nodded and let him pick her up and carry her on the bed. He sat next to her as she lied down, stroking her hair until she finally felt asleep.
“Well? Aren’t Battler-kun and Sayo-chan going to join us?” Eva Nē-san asked Jessica-chan as soon as she joined them back.
“Battler said she’s tired and to just excuse them,” the girl replied a little uneasily.
“I might go pay her a visit just in case,” Nanjō Sensei offered motioning to stand up but Jessica-chan hurried to stop him.
“No, no, Battler said it’s not necessary, that she’s just tired and needs rest and to let her quiet,” she assured and Nanjō Sensei returned to sit down.
“If that’s the case… but please, make them sure it wouldn’t be a trouble for me to visit her,” the man recommended.
“Sure thing she’s frail. My, my, it would be a problem if she had inherited Natsuhi Nē-san’s weak health,” Eva Nē-san commented waving her fan as she tossed a meaningful glance at Natsuhi Nē-san.
“There’s no way that girl could have inherited something from me as we aren’t related,” Natsuhi Nē-san returned icily, giving away, in the way she saw ‘that girl’, how she thought low of Sayo-chan.
“Now, now, it could happen to everyone to feel a little overtired. No need to make a fuss over it,” Hideyoshi Nī-san mediated.
“Battler-kun could have joined us, though. It’s six years from the last time we’ve seen him,” Krauss Nī-san pointed out before sipping his tea.
“Ah, he said he preferred to remain with his wife just in case,” Jessica-chan explained.
“Sure is, your son pampers ‘his wife’ as if he believed he’d married a princess, Rudolf,” Eva Nē-san commented with a subtle jab to Sayo-chan’s previously low social status. “Shouldn’t you give him a little talk about what’s important to prioritize in life?”
“A wife’s duty is not to hold back her husband with her own health problems,” Natsuhi Nē-san commented coldly and a bit hypocritically considering how much of a troubles her headaches and inability to conceives had been for Krauss Nī-san.
“Natsuhi Nē-san, I would recommend not even mentioning this in front of Battler. He’s still not over Asumu’s death in the slightest,” Rudolf-san admitted hoping to avoid having his son embarrassing him. “And I’m willing to bet that’s why he fusses over Sayo-chan so much.”
It wasn’t a secret for anyone in the Ushiromiya family that Asumu-san, Rudolf-san’s first wife, died because she was so stupid she didn’t take proper care of her health, apparently in favour of focusing on her family, and that Battler-kun suffered from her death greatly and resented Rudolf-san for not having been as devoted to her as he believed Asumu-san had been to him.
“Well, it might make sense for him to consider her as a replacement to his mother figure,” Rosa-san observed. “Considering Rudolf Nī-san left him on his own.”
“Hey, hey, he is the one who left the family on his own!” Rudolf-san defended himself. “I tried to keep contact and he was the one who kept distance!”
“Still, Rudolf-san, I think you should have tried harder in regards to your son and that you shouldn’t have allowed him to make such a disgraceful marriage,” Natsuhi Nē-san stated. In the family, she seemed to be the one who disapproved of Battler-kun’s marriage the most. “Tainting Tōshu-sama’s blood by mixing it with the one of a low class orphaned girl of unknown origins… Battler-kun is too young and can’t realize what big of a mistake this is.”
“On this I agree with Natsuhi Nē-san,” Eva Nē-san commented and it was so unusual to have her and Natsuhi Nē-san agree on something that people stared at her almost in shock. “I can see Battler-kun cares for Sayo-chan but you don’t choose who to marry just due to something that can turn out to be a mere infatuation. You must choose with prudence a partner with a secure background and then you’ll start building up feelings for that person. Don’t I always say you that, George?” she asked shooting a glance to her son.
“Yes, Kā-san,” George-kun replied obediently. It wasn’t a secret he wasn’t thrilled with the person Eva Nē-san had chosen for him, and knowing him he shouldn’t like how the discussion was going, but apparently he knew better than intrude in a discussion between adults. That, or, Kyrie guessed, deep down he had his own reasons to be unhappy with Sayo-chan and Battler-kun’s marriage.
“If I can say a word,” Kyrie began politely. “I think Hisashi-san, Battler-kun’s grandfather, had allowed him to marry with Sayo-chan and at such a young age because he was keeping his grandson’s best interests in his mind, and therefore put great care in his choice.” She knew she had to choose her words carefully or they would end up being exchanged for lack of care for Battler-kun’s future, the words of a stepmother who didn’t mind if her stepson made a bad marriage.
“Well, considering Battler-kun had left the Ushiromiya and the Hisashi weren’t exactly a prestigious family as us, he might have seen nothing wrong at aiming a little low… but really, Sayo-chan is way too low, even for the Hisashi,” Eva Nē-san observed. “A nobody’s daughter who had worked as a maid…”
“Honestly I think Hisashi-san couldn’t care less about her origins… He was a romantic. All he wanted for Battler-kun was a wife who would love and support his grandson when he wouldn’t be around to protect him anymore,” she clarified. “He had two years to observe Sayo-chan and see how she and Battler-kun interacted and then he made his choice. He could see she loved Battler-kun for who he was, that she knew how to support him in troubled times, that she was serious and modest and that she wasn’t interested in Battler-kun for his fancy family name or his money,” she pointed out. “Yes, she’s an orphan, which probably allows her to better understand Battler-kun’s pain for losing… his mother figure at such a young age…” she couldn’t help but make a pause before mentioning what Battler-kun lost, “…and made easier for her to support him when Hisashi-san passed away,” she went on. “She has lived in the Hisashi house for two years and knows its rules and how it works. She’s unpretentious, not scared of working hard and doesn’t dream of luxurious things. She doesn’t just blindly love Battler-kun but also shares with him the same interests and has a good chemistry with him. Battler-kun loves her and her presence helps him to improve himself. Really, for a man like Hisashi-san, who didn’t aim to have his grandson make a business profitable marriage but was seriously invested into giving him the happiest marriage possible, Sayo-chan must have looked like the perfect choice. And I can testify that, so far, they’re having a very happy marriage.”
“Well, there’s no denying they’re very cute together and Battler-kun does his best to take care of her…” Rosa-san said in a mix between longing and bitterness.
“Still, I think someone with Battler-kun’s looks and background might have picked up better. Really, Rudolf, you should have stopped that marriage from taking place… or, at least, you shouldn’t have allowed Battler-kun to register Sayo-chan also into the Ushiromiya family register. Maybe she could be an acceptable wife for Hisashi Battler but for Ushiromiya Battler…” Eva Nē-san shook her head in disapprobation. “Really, you never took marriage seriously.”
“As if Hisashi-san or Battler would listen me. Battler would have more likely remained a Hisashi than give up on Sayo-chan,” Rudolf-san said with a shrug. “For him the Ushiromiya name had never mattered much, after all… and I’ve to admit Sayo-chan isn’t so bad with him.”
“Yes, yes, they don’t seem so bad together,” Hideyoshi Nī-san agreed. “Eva, you shouldn’t butt in so rudely into other families business. If Battler-kun is happy then it’s all right.”
“Natsuhi, you too. Though I can’t say I approve of Battler-kun’s choice, what’s done is done,” Krauss Nī-san added.
“I still think someone should care about Battler-kun’s future. You’re being too dismissive of the whole matter but would you feel the same if this had happened to Jessica?” his wife insisted. In her own stern way she cared for Battler-kun… almost as much as she disliked Sayo-chan.
“I’m perfectly capable to care for my future on my own,” Jessica-chan grumbled under her breath and Natsuhi Nē-san glared at her.
“I think it’s too early to judge if Battler-kun’s marriage is a good one or not. After all they’re both too young. Let’s see which future they’ll try to build together before giving judgment. If it were to turn out Sayo-chan doesn’t know how to properly take care of her husband and disappoint Battler-kun… then it’s not like she’ll have the weapons to complain if she were to end up being erased from the family register,” Kyrie observed with a shrug. “But I’m pretty sure we won’t get to this. Also, I’m fearing with all our talking we’re boring the kids to death. George-kun, Jessica-chan, Maria-chan, if you’ve finished your tea why don’t you get a break from this boring adult discussion and find something fun to do?” Her suggestion was welcomed with poorly masked enthusiasm as the kids hurried to catch their chance to leave, Jessica-chan and Maria-chan literally running out while George-kun, at least, left in a bit more composed manner.
Kyrie smiled as they left, then turned on Natsuhi Nē-san.
“There’s to say Jessica-chan has grown up into a beautiful young woman, filled with spirit and confidence. I’m sure it’s thanks to your hard work and guidance, Natsuhi Nē-san,” she observed in a honest tone.
“Yes, time in which girls had to act all demure and proper had finished long ago, hadn’t it, Nī-san?” Eva Nē-san commented, knowing fully well how Krauss Nī-san thought the exact opposite. “It’s time for them to spread their wings and choose their future and I could see Jessica-chan is planning to do exactly this,” she added. Kyrie seated herself more comfortably. She knew that Eva Nē-san wouldn’t have missed Jessica-chan’s grumbled words and be more than willing to forget criticising Battler-kun’s marriage if given the chance to indulge in her favourite hobby, making remarks on Krauss Nī-san and Natsuhi Nē-san’s poor parenting skill.
Really, maybe they shouldn’t have asked Battler-kun and Sayo-chan if they wanted to come with them on Rokken-jima, especially considering the delicate situation they were in. On the other side Eva Nē-san had insisted with Rudolf-san about taking them along, thinking she could use the newlywed presence as an excuse to demand for Otō-san to show up so as to pressure Krauss Nī-san and Natsuhi Nē-san to admit he was dead and they had kept it hidden or to give in into their demands.
Kyrie didn’t really see it as a winning strategy and had, quite frankly, warned against it. Actually it offered to Krauss Nī-san the excuse to claim Otō-san wouldn’t show up because upset due to Battler-kun’s marriage. Rudolf-san and Eva Nē-san though, had stated that this too would work in their favour. If Kinzō-san were to find Battler-kun’s marriage such a grave sin against the Ushiromiya… well, he wouldn’t lose the chance to scold him himself. Just closing himself in his study… this would be a way too tame reaction for Kinzō-san.
Well, after all it was the way too tame reaction he ‘had’ the past time when he apparently ‘heard’ them bitching over money that strengthened in them the belief he was already dead. Kinzō-san wasn’t the man to just quietly close himself in his study when angry, he was more likely to give verbal if not physical abuse to whoever were to upset him.
Still… this strategy meant to involve Battler-kun, to use him as a pawn in that squabble between siblings. If Battler-kun had merely been Asumu-san’s son as she had believed for 18 years, she would have had no hesitations in using him. For 18 years she had resented his whole existence as a constant memory that her own son had died and Asumu-san’s child had survived. But after Battler-kun had married, Rudolf-san had told her the truth and she… she still didn’t know how to cope with it. She was too deep into her obsession for Rudolf-san to be capable to give up on him, to accept he had used her and Asumu-san as he pleased, that he had toyed with the life of his own child, lying to the three of them for his own sake.
And on the other side there was Battler-kun, raised by Asumu-san and her family to be the exact opposite of his father. A gentle and selfless child that loved his wife and did his best to take care of her. A gentle and selfless child who didn’t resent her or Ange even if he knew she was the one with whom his father was cheating the woman he believed was his mother and that he adored.
In a way Kyrie saw this as another battle she had lost against Asumu-san. If she had been in her place… she wouldn’t have raised Battler-kun to be so gentle and accepting. If she had raised him… she would have made sure he would have hated Asumu-san and Asumu-san’s kid and would have fought them with all he could… especially if she were to suspect Rudolf-san might have switched the babies. If she’d been in Asumu-san’s place… she would have made sure Battler-kun would have never felt nothing else but hate for Asumu-san, even if she were her true mother. This would have been her revenge.
Asumu-san instead… had adopted another strategy. Instead than focusing on using Battler-kun against Kyrie… she had given her all to be the best mother possible for him. The fact she hadn’t felt the need to instruct Battler-kun to hate her… felt like a smack in Kyrie’s face. Asumu-san had been so confident in her place in Rudolf-san’s heart, in Battler-kun’s heart… she hadn’t needed to make sure he would hate her rival.
Kyrie couldn’t replace Asumu-san in Battler-kun’s eyes… and this wasn’t because he hated her but simply because Asumu-san to him was simply too important, too special, too perfect. Even if he were to be told the truth… Asumu-san would still be the woman he would recognize as his mother, the one who had raised him with love and care despite him not being her child while Kyrie would just be… his biological gene donor or something like that. Nothing more.
If only Asumu-san had raised Battler-kun to hate her rival… despite Kyrie being his true mother… Kyrie could have hoped that, once learnt the truth, Battler-kun could have been disgusted by Asumu-san’s behaviour. Like this though… even if Battler-kun were to know the truth… Asumu-san would still win.
For Kyrie to finally beat her… to finally get rid of her ghost… she couldn’t content herself with just being Rudolf-san’s only partner. She would also have to prove she was the best mother also. The best mother for Ange… and the best mother for Battler-kun.
And then…
…she’ll be…
…finally free.
JJ's Extra Notes:
Nobody knows who was Asumu’s family name so I had to make it up. I’ve picked Hisashi up. It’s not canon though.
Also yes, Rudolf told Kyrie the truth. She didn’t kill him but that’s why she’s trying to be nicer with Battler… although for her this is also in order to try and beat Asumu up. In her place I’ll beat Rudolf up but well… she simply can’t let him go.
Dictionary:
-chan: Name ending used to express affection and familiarity or to talk with a child
-kun: Young
-jima: Island
-sama: "Lord" or "Lady"
-san: "Mr." or "Mrs."
Aniki: "Brother" or "Older boy"
Jī-chan: "Grandfather" or "Old man"
Kami: "God"
Kā-san: "Mother"
Nē-san: "Sister" or "Older girl"
Nī-san: "Brother" or "Older boy"
Oba-san: "Aunt" or "Woman"
Oji-san: "Uncle" or "Man"
Oku-sama: "Wife" or "Married lady" or "Madam"
Onē-chan: "Sister" or "Older girl"
Otō-san: "Father"
Oyakata:
"Master of the house" or "Lord"
Sensei: "Doctor"
Tōshu: "Family head"
Yakitori: "Grilled chicken"
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