Fic: And Three Makes Trouble
So there I was, reading and commenting on elistaires post about the female characters in Highlander fanfiction, when I suddenly got to thinking about Amanda’s rainy day jewels. I also realised that, while Amanda and Methos get a lot of play in my stories, Duncan rarely gets an appearance.
The result? This piece of silliness!
Fandom: Highlander
Characters: Duncan, Amanda, and Methos
Genre: Humour
Rating: Gen
Wordcount: 1,175
Disclaimer: Oh, how I wish they were mine….
And Three Makes Trouble
It was a beautiful night, warm and balmy, with a hint of jasmine in the air; a night for a midnight swim and perhaps a long romantic walk followed by some champagne and caviar. So when Amanda had arrived on his doorstep, dressed in a long fur coat and glint in her eye…well, he really should have known better.
“I don’t believe I let you talk me into this,” Duncan muttered, grunting under Amanda’s weight as he gave her a leg up.
“Duncan, darling, you know I need this score,” Amanda purred as she neatly pulled herself on top of the wall. “I wouldn’t usually ask but…”
“Yes, yes, I know,” Duncan, said, resisting the urge to roll his eyes. “You’re never going to let me forget that, are you?”
“A girl’s got to have her rainy day jewels, Duncan,” Amanda said firmly. “One feels practically naked without them.” A rope slithered to the ground and Duncan reluctantly hauled himself up beside her.
Amanda smirked as he irritably dusted himself off. “Stop pouting, darling. This will be fun…it’ll be just like old times.”
“Let’s hope not,” Duncan said dryly. “We forgot to bring a shovel.”
“Don’t be such a pessimist,” she said as she gathered up the rope and let it fall into the manicured gardens. “Besides, posses have gone out of fashion; nowadays they just give you eight to ten.”
“Thank you, Amanda, I feel so much better now” But the sarcasm was wasted, as Amanda was already shinning down the rope.
Muttering under his breath, he followed her down and eyed the châteaux that was their target. “So, let me get this straight. This Mr…”
“Lombardi”
“…is a bigwig in corporate sales,” Duncan continued, . “He seems to be doing very well for a salesman?”
“Oh, this isn’t the half of it, darling, the frightful man has houses in London and Rome as well. He really is disgustingly wealthy.”
Duncan sighed. “And the collection?” he prompted.
“Bought on the black market, very hush, hush. I would never have heard of it if it weren’t that an old friend of mine was involved in the original theft.”
“So I’m guessing this man isn’t insured,” Duncan said, feeling a moment of misgiving.
“Don’t tell me you’re feeling sorry for him. The man bought stolen goods, Duncan, he isn’t exactly an innocent.”
“That’s not what I’m worried about,” he muttered. “Don’t you think that a man who-” Duncan stiffened as he felt the presence of another immortal come into range, and slowly reached into his coat.
“Full moon, starry sky, a perfect night for a spot of breaking and entering,” a dry voice said from the shadows.
“Methos,” Duncan said wearily, relaxing as the elder immortal stepped from the gloom. “Why am I not surprised?”
Methos shrugged, his innocent expression melting into a mischievous grin. “You didn’t think I’d miss this, did you? Duncan MacLeod, cat burglar extraordinaire.”
Duncan’s glared at Amanda, not fooled for a moment by guileless pout on her face. “Amanda.”
“Okay, so maybe you weren’t my first choice for this little heist,” she admitted with a little smile, which quickly disappeared when she noticed the expression on his face. “Well, lets face it, darling, Methos doesn’t quite suffer under the same burden of ethics as you do.”
Methos smirked. “I do believe I resemble that remark”
“Not helping, Methos,” Amanda said lightly as Duncan growled.
“Just an observation…so, how are we going to do this?” Methos asked, rubbing his hands together.
“We,” echoed Duncan, not quite believing the turn his night was taking. “What’s this we business.”
“Don’t look at me,” Methos said. “She was the one that suggested it.”
Amanda laughed nervously. “Yes, well, let’s not dwell on that, shall we?”
Duncan felt a moment of suspicion as he looked at the air of innocence that suddenly emanated from the duo. “What are you two up to?” he asked. “And since when did you two suddenly start planning robberies together - no, forget I asked that,” he added hastily. “I don’t want to know.”
“Oh Duncan, don’t be like that,” Amanda said cajolingly, draping her arms around his neck. “It’s just that, when I originally planned this heist, I asked Methos to my lookout and he suggested I’d bring you along for extra back-up just in case…you know, things went wrong…”
“The next thing you’ll be telling me is that Joe is our getaway driver,” Duncan snorted before noticing the guilty look on Amanda’s face. “Amanda, tell me you didn’t.”
“He said no,” Amanda admitted under her breath.
Duncan groaned. “Thank God for little mercies. You’re impossible, do you know that?”
“I know, but you still love me, don’t you?” Amanda said, pecking him on the lips
Methos sniggered and Duncan threw him a dirty look. “Don’t think I’m letting you off the hook that easily, old man.”
“Hey, since when did this become my fault? I’m just the lookout, remember?” Methos protested. “I look, you burgle, that’s the plan.”
“And its got your paws all over it,” Duncan said, shaking his head in defeat. “I don’t believe I’m saying this, but lets get this over with.”
“Really?” A smile bloomed on Amanda’s face. “Oh thank you, darling, you won’t regret this.”
Duncan smiled grimly. “I don’t plan to,” he said, clamping a hand on Methos’s shoulder, who grimaced under the pressure. “Come on, let’s go”
“Hey, wait a minute,” Methos said, digging his heels in. “I’m supposed to stay here and keep watch, remember?”
“Change of plan,” Duncan said, smirking. “Now you’re going to stay with us and keep watch. Think how much more efficient it will be.”
“Much as I’d like to oblige you, MacLeod, I’ve left my safecracking days behind me. It just wasn’t the same after old Butch and Sundance bought the farm.”
“Sounds like you need the practise then, we wouldn’t want you getting all rusty,” Duncan drawled as he dragged the reluctant immortal across the lawn.
“Will you stop that,” Methos spluttered, wrenching his shoulder away. “I’m perfectly capable of walking under my own steam, thank you very much.”
“Glad to hear it, I wouldn’t like to think you’re getting doddery in your old age.”
“Boys, boys, could you keep it down a little,” Amanda hissed worriedly. “We don’t want to announce our arrival to the entire house.”
“Yes, Mac, keep it down.”
Duncan threw Methos a disbelieving look. “How old are you, three?”
Grinning, Methos put a finger to his lips as he dodged out of his reach and linked arms with Amanda. “We have a house to burgle, MacLeod, try to show a little professionalism.”
Duncan briefly wondered if it wasn’t too late to turn back as he watched them skip across the grass. What the hell had he’s been thinking when he introduced these two? It must have been a brief moment of insanity.
Just like the one he was having now.
“Wait up,” he said, laughing despite himself, and Amanda extended her other arm, grabbing his hand as he joined them.
FINIS
And the Companion Piece (from Joe's point of view) : Three Little Watchers