Super sonic gin and tonic
So I rode my motorcycle into town today. And by rode I mean pushed. And by pushed I mean rubbed my naked body against a cactus.
So I went to several prime locations for job aquisitions but everyone said I didn't have enough experience! Pfa! What is that!?! I guess that entire week I dedicated to just watching Saved by the Bell doesn't count as work experience these days! I didn't even leave the TV to use the bathroom! How eccentric of me! BLAAAAAAAUUUWEEEEUUUAAAARGG!
So anyway, I even went to see my buds at the local Video Emporium, and low and behold, the ungreatful bastards didn't even want me in their store! They were all like "i've heard of you! you think respectable businesses are video rental stores, when they clearly aren't! This is a pet store! I don't think you're very qualified, given that you are wearing the caracasses of dead animals in place of clothing!"
The video clerk was right. I was wearing the latest in Paris chien de l'orange fasion which I had picked up off the road on the way over. After tearing through several hamster-shaped DVD cases searching for a copy of an Olsen Twins movie, I was kicked out of the store.
I finally found this one place called the Volunteer Center that said they would hire me on tomorrow! Surely they recognized my skills as a top CEO/Business Executive and I will soon be rolling in the dough, and after that I'll be rolling in the olsen twins DVDs, and after that I'll be rolling in the mints (as science dictates).
So I went to several prime locations for job aquisitions but everyone said I didn't have enough experience! Pfa! What is that!?! I guess that entire week I dedicated to just watching Saved by the Bell doesn't count as work experience these days! I didn't even leave the TV to use the bathroom! How eccentric of me! BLAAAAAAAUUUWEEEEUUUAAAARGG!
So anyway, I even went to see my buds at the local Video Emporium, and low and behold, the ungreatful bastards didn't even want me in their store! They were all like "i've heard of you! you think respectable businesses are video rental stores, when they clearly aren't! This is a pet store! I don't think you're very qualified, given that you are wearing the caracasses of dead animals in place of clothing!"
The video clerk was right. I was wearing the latest in Paris chien de l'orange fasion which I had picked up off the road on the way over. After tearing through several hamster-shaped DVD cases searching for a copy of an Olsen Twins movie, I was kicked out of the store.
I finally found this one place called the Volunteer Center that said they would hire me on tomorrow! Surely they recognized my skills as a top CEO/Business Executive and I will soon be rolling in the dough, and after that I'll be rolling in the olsen twins DVDs, and after that I'll be rolling in the mints (as science dictates).