Why I hate bands with dumb names...
Something's been bothering me about the music scene lately. That something is bands with utterly rubbish names. Examples, you ask? Here's a few...
Joe Lean and the Jing Jang Jong
Paracoccidioidomicosisproctitissarcomucosis
Anal Cunt
The The
...and You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Dead
...and so on and so on.
This hatred stemmed from a conversation I had with someone a few years ago (who was a bit of a prick, but that's a separate matter) when he excitedly told me about the aforementioned indie band "Joe Lean and the Jing Jang Jong". I replied "That's such a stupid name" to which he replied "Yeah, but a wacky name will get you noticed. That's the way it is now"...
The hatred formed from many points of this conversation. One of which was that this idiot clearly had no idea of what he's talking about, secondly I have a deep-seated hatred of this new wave of indie bollocks (Yes, I'm talking to you Kasabian, Arctic Monkeys, Panic! At The Disco and others...) and thirdly this idiot's assumption that the only way to get any recognition in the music industry is to have a ridiculous name, not have much talent and then the rest will fall into place.
Oh where do I begin? I'll start first by admitting a home truth. I'm in a band called Special Guests, reason being we're playing on the 'plus Special Guests' statement on a concert ticket. We're big fans of puns and wordplay. So I'm no stranger to quirky names. Except the named bands above are not quirky, they're just plain stupid.
Joe Lean & the Jing Jang Jong: This was a bland indie band that had mass media buzz surrounding them (due to their name as they'd rarely performed and their name was discussed in great detail in the pages of NME). The band had changed their name to this from Joe Lean and the Tantrums, which actually isn't a bad name! It brings back a classic style of band names prominent in the 50's & 60's. However, changing it to something that sounds like he was introducing himself before being cut off by the sound of a wind chime. They also present themselves like a bunch of preening tossers who seem proud that they've raided both their dad's and their little sister's wardrobes simultaneously.
Paracoccidioidomicosisproctitissarcomucosis: I'm not joking, this is an actual band name. This kind of name annoys me too. Why would you purposefully make your band name difficult to pronounce? This kind of band name can't easily flow in conversation and it's almost impossible to abbreviate. These guys are a Mexican grindcore band whose lyrics consist of the usual death, destruction, necrophilia associated with the genre. For their MySpace page they conveniently abbreviated it to officialparacoccidio for reasons of restrictions in a URL.
Anal Cunt: Aah, the shock value name. Kind of like a musical Frankie Boyle.
The The: Oh come on, are you even trying anymore?
...and You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Dead: This is one of those "Ooh, we're so serious and we know we are. To prove it we decided to make our band name a sentence which suggests mildly disturbing themes!" This band named themselves after an ancient Mayan ritual, but it's more of an extended in-joke. This band name is equally ridiculous, but it can be abbreviated (and HAS been abbreviated to Trail Of Dead, which makes sense). This mainly stems from my disdain for dark band names. I just think names like that just bore me. It's a death metal name and they're not even a death metal band! To my narrow-minded feeble brain, these guys are no better than bands like Prostitute Disfigurement, Necrophagia, Graves of Valor etc etc
Coincidentally these happen to be bands from genres I don't particularly like so in a way I'm a bit biased (I'm a hard rock and blues kinda chap). Though I'll follow up this post with rock bands with equally silly names. No one will be safe!
Later guys!
Joe Lean and the Jing Jang Jong
Paracoccidioidomicosisproctitissarcomucosis
Anal Cunt
The The
...and You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Dead
...and so on and so on.
This hatred stemmed from a conversation I had with someone a few years ago (who was a bit of a prick, but that's a separate matter) when he excitedly told me about the aforementioned indie band "Joe Lean and the Jing Jang Jong". I replied "That's such a stupid name" to which he replied "Yeah, but a wacky name will get you noticed. That's the way it is now"...
The hatred formed from many points of this conversation. One of which was that this idiot clearly had no idea of what he's talking about, secondly I have a deep-seated hatred of this new wave of indie bollocks (Yes, I'm talking to you Kasabian, Arctic Monkeys, Panic! At The Disco and others...) and thirdly this idiot's assumption that the only way to get any recognition in the music industry is to have a ridiculous name, not have much talent and then the rest will fall into place.
Oh where do I begin? I'll start first by admitting a home truth. I'm in a band called Special Guests, reason being we're playing on the 'plus Special Guests' statement on a concert ticket. We're big fans of puns and wordplay. So I'm no stranger to quirky names. Except the named bands above are not quirky, they're just plain stupid.
Joe Lean & the Jing Jang Jong: This was a bland indie band that had mass media buzz surrounding them (due to their name as they'd rarely performed and their name was discussed in great detail in the pages of NME). The band had changed their name to this from Joe Lean and the Tantrums, which actually isn't a bad name! It brings back a classic style of band names prominent in the 50's & 60's. However, changing it to something that sounds like he was introducing himself before being cut off by the sound of a wind chime. They also present themselves like a bunch of preening tossers who seem proud that they've raided both their dad's and their little sister's wardrobes simultaneously.
Paracoccidioidomicosisproctitissarcomucosis: I'm not joking, this is an actual band name. This kind of name annoys me too. Why would you purposefully make your band name difficult to pronounce? This kind of band name can't easily flow in conversation and it's almost impossible to abbreviate. These guys are a Mexican grindcore band whose lyrics consist of the usual death, destruction, necrophilia associated with the genre. For their MySpace page they conveniently abbreviated it to officialparacoccidio for reasons of restrictions in a URL.
Anal Cunt: Aah, the shock value name. Kind of like a musical Frankie Boyle.
The The: Oh come on, are you even trying anymore?
...and You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Dead: This is one of those "Ooh, we're so serious and we know we are. To prove it we decided to make our band name a sentence which suggests mildly disturbing themes!" This band named themselves after an ancient Mayan ritual, but it's more of an extended in-joke. This band name is equally ridiculous, but it can be abbreviated (and HAS been abbreviated to Trail Of Dead, which makes sense). This mainly stems from my disdain for dark band names. I just think names like that just bore me. It's a death metal name and they're not even a death metal band! To my narrow-minded feeble brain, these guys are no better than bands like Prostitute Disfigurement, Necrophagia, Graves of Valor etc etc
Coincidentally these happen to be bands from genres I don't particularly like so in a way I'm a bit biased (I'm a hard rock and blues kinda chap). Though I'll follow up this post with rock bands with equally silly names. No one will be safe!
Later guys!