"For example: can a Downs child successfully become bar/bat mitzvah? "
Yes. Unequivocally, yes. The child becomes a bar or bat mitzvah when they turn 13 (or 12, for girls, in some traditions). I won't go into why those ages were chosen as compromises. No ceremony is required, no recognition is required: it just happens.
What we're talking about is a recognition of what has already happened, and it has *become* a rite of passage simply because the young person is now doing things that adults are permitted to do. But leading an entire service isn't necessary. Even *reading* from Torah isn't necessary; it's the *aliyah* which is the big thing, technically. But because most liberal synagogues have a particular ritual set up, it becomes noticeable when someone deviates from that norm. Given the individual needs of each and every young adult, though, many skill sets fall outside of this particular ritual set, and it can go from "uncomfortable" to "sheer torture," especially when you factor in 6 months of intense preparation. I can't count how many young Jews have been turned off from Judaism because of their Bar or Bat Mitzvah celebration.
And this doesn't even take into account how making a huge fuss about it makes them think that this is the focal point, the end of a process rather than the beginning of responsible adult life. I keep trying to tell the kids in Hebrew school (who hate going to school, of course, and hate the cramming that they have to do) that they should stick with it afterwards, because *after* is where we actually get to the _interesting_ stuff. Some of them even believe me. For some who don't, their parents might believe me; I had at least one kid whose mother basically paid him to attend 8th grade classes. Eventually he came to realize that he was getting useful things from the classes.
And I agree about the blessings. The congregations with which I associate have a policy: Non-Jews don't lead Jews in prayer. They can take part, they can offer a separate blessing (often an English shehecheyanu) but they do not lead the blessings.
But I think that, as liberal Jews, we need to reclaim that halacha. It speaks directly to the original question, and would *free* us from what has become, in some cases, our own folly. Saying "hey, guess what - this *is* Judaism!" would cast a change in the ritual in a different light than otherwise, where it might look like "hey, we're making this up as we go along." I think that, if positioned correctly, is would be playing to the crowd.
Yes. Unequivocally, yes. The child becomes a bar or bat mitzvah when they turn 13 (or 12, for girls, in some traditions). I won't go into why those ages were chosen as compromises. No ceremony is required, no recognition is required: it just happens.
What we're talking about is a recognition of what has already happened, and it has *become* a rite of passage simply because the young person is now doing things that adults are permitted to do. But leading an entire service isn't necessary. Even *reading* from Torah isn't necessary; it's the *aliyah* which is the big thing, technically. But because most liberal synagogues have a particular ritual set up, it becomes noticeable when someone deviates from that norm. Given the individual needs of each and every young adult, though, many skill sets fall outside of this particular ritual set, and it can go from "uncomfortable" to "sheer torture," especially when you factor in 6 months of intense preparation. I can't count how many young Jews have been turned off from Judaism because of their Bar or Bat Mitzvah celebration.
And this doesn't even take into account how making a huge fuss about it makes them think that this is the focal point, the end of a process rather than the beginning of responsible adult life. I keep trying to tell the kids in Hebrew school (who hate going to school, of course, and hate the cramming that they have to do) that they should stick with it afterwards, because *after* is where we actually get to the _interesting_ stuff. Some of them even believe me. For some who don't, their parents might believe me; I had at least one kid whose mother basically paid him to attend 8th grade classes. Eventually he came to realize that he was getting useful things from the classes.
And I agree about the blessings. The congregations with which I associate have a policy: Non-Jews don't lead Jews in prayer. They can take part, they can offer a separate blessing (often an English shehecheyanu) but they do not lead the blessings.
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