The Grass Is Always Greener
Title: The Grass Is Always Greener...
Author: jimmysullivan
Band: Avenged Sevenfold
Rating: G
Disclaimer: I do not own anyone mentioned in this story. Nor do I have any affiliation. It is all fiction, it is all in good fun.
Summary: You always want the one thing you can't have.
Date(s) Posted: 02/17/06
It was one of those bittersweet moments, where the smile on your face was the only thing holding back the tears in your eyes. The way he held her close to him, the tiny fragile thing in his arms, there was nothing you could do but smile. The family resemblance was so obvious, the dark hair, the chubby cheeks. You choked back the sob forming in your throat as he looked over at you, standing in the kitchen next to his proud mother, her most successful child and her first granddaughter. You thought your knees were going to give out from holding everything in, listening to the coos that were mumbled from his lips and the loving looks he was giving his niece. Your heart was swelling and breaking, each pump cracking the vessel a bit more. Your hand rested on his mother’s shoulder and she looked up at you, the tears threatening to spill down your cheeks.
“You’re a good boy, Brian.” That’s all she had to say and you excused yourself, the masculine part of you refusing to let you sob openly in front of your boyfriend’s family. Truth be told, you had been together longer than most couples even dare to be before they get married, and the two of you had been denied that privilege. Despite the hardships the two of you suffered, there seemed to be no reward except for the unconditional love you had to give to one another.
Pushing open the door to his childhood room, you slid inside, making sure the door clicked behind you. You looked around at the room you had once known, the floor you had slept on countless times, the window you had crawled through drunk on more than one occasion. Sitting on the small twin bed with your head in your hands, you let yourself go. You looked up when you heard the door open, but there was no need to. You knew who it was, and no words needed to be spoken between the two of you. All there was as soft, sweet smelling hands wiping the hot tears off your cheeks, a sniffle coming from his nose. The bed creaked as he sat down next to you, his arms slipping around your neck. You pulled him as close as you could without pulling him on top of you, your fingers rubbing up and down his spine as he too let himself go. No words needed to be spoken; you both knew the reasons behind the tears. Behind the choked sobs and shaking shoulders and quivering chins and runny noses.
He knew how sorry you were. That this couldn’t be easier, that through all the research you had done, there was really nowhere that the two of you could get married, and even if you could, the eyes of the law in California would never see you two as married. That despite everything you went through that he couldn’t look you in the eyes and call you his husband because it wasn’t legal.
He knew how sorry you were. That the two of you could never see the other with child, as awkward as that may sound. That there would be no stomach to sing and play guitar to, that there would never be any child that would bear the blood of both Zachary Baker and Brian Haner. That there would never be any startling green eyes running around with a button nose and a love from drawing and a natural talent for music.
He knew how sorry you were. That you would never be a complete family, that you would always be missing something. The two of you had been talking adoption for months, and although you knew it was the only way, that was how you thought of it. The only way the two of you could ever have children. He knew how sorry you were that it was only the main choice because there was no other way.
But there was nothing you could do, nothing but sit there in his bedroom and hold each other and cry, because everything the two of you had ever wanted, everyone else took for granted. All you could do was joke to his sister as you bucked yourself up downstairs that you were going to steal her daughter for the next twenty-one years, because she had enough of the Baker traits to be Zacky’s little girl. All you could do was pull yourself together whenever the subject of children was brought up because the last thing you wanted was to see those beautiful green eyes you loved so much clouded with tears.
All you could do was be sorry and work through this dark place, because the love of your life deserved so much more than a sap of a boyfriend who just wanted the one thing he could never have.
The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence, was the only thing you could tell yourself.
Author: jimmysullivan
Band: Avenged Sevenfold
Rating: G
Disclaimer: I do not own anyone mentioned in this story. Nor do I have any affiliation. It is all fiction, it is all in good fun.
Summary: You always want the one thing you can't have.
Date(s) Posted: 02/17/06
It was one of those bittersweet moments, where the smile on your face was the only thing holding back the tears in your eyes. The way he held her close to him, the tiny fragile thing in his arms, there was nothing you could do but smile. The family resemblance was so obvious, the dark hair, the chubby cheeks. You choked back the sob forming in your throat as he looked over at you, standing in the kitchen next to his proud mother, her most successful child and her first granddaughter. You thought your knees were going to give out from holding everything in, listening to the coos that were mumbled from his lips and the loving looks he was giving his niece. Your heart was swelling and breaking, each pump cracking the vessel a bit more. Your hand rested on his mother’s shoulder and she looked up at you, the tears threatening to spill down your cheeks.
“You’re a good boy, Brian.” That’s all she had to say and you excused yourself, the masculine part of you refusing to let you sob openly in front of your boyfriend’s family. Truth be told, you had been together longer than most couples even dare to be before they get married, and the two of you had been denied that privilege. Despite the hardships the two of you suffered, there seemed to be no reward except for the unconditional love you had to give to one another.
Pushing open the door to his childhood room, you slid inside, making sure the door clicked behind you. You looked around at the room you had once known, the floor you had slept on countless times, the window you had crawled through drunk on more than one occasion. Sitting on the small twin bed with your head in your hands, you let yourself go. You looked up when you heard the door open, but there was no need to. You knew who it was, and no words needed to be spoken between the two of you. All there was as soft, sweet smelling hands wiping the hot tears off your cheeks, a sniffle coming from his nose. The bed creaked as he sat down next to you, his arms slipping around your neck. You pulled him as close as you could without pulling him on top of you, your fingers rubbing up and down his spine as he too let himself go. No words needed to be spoken; you both knew the reasons behind the tears. Behind the choked sobs and shaking shoulders and quivering chins and runny noses.
He knew how sorry you were. That this couldn’t be easier, that through all the research you had done, there was really nowhere that the two of you could get married, and even if you could, the eyes of the law in California would never see you two as married. That despite everything you went through that he couldn’t look you in the eyes and call you his husband because it wasn’t legal.
He knew how sorry you were. That the two of you could never see the other with child, as awkward as that may sound. That there would be no stomach to sing and play guitar to, that there would never be any child that would bear the blood of both Zachary Baker and Brian Haner. That there would never be any startling green eyes running around with a button nose and a love from drawing and a natural talent for music.
He knew how sorry you were. That you would never be a complete family, that you would always be missing something. The two of you had been talking adoption for months, and although you knew it was the only way, that was how you thought of it. The only way the two of you could ever have children. He knew how sorry you were that it was only the main choice because there was no other way.
But there was nothing you could do, nothing but sit there in his bedroom and hold each other and cry, because everything the two of you had ever wanted, everyone else took for granted. All you could do was joke to his sister as you bucked yourself up downstairs that you were going to steal her daughter for the next twenty-one years, because she had enough of the Baker traits to be Zacky’s little girl. All you could do was pull yourself together whenever the subject of children was brought up because the last thing you wanted was to see those beautiful green eyes you loved so much clouded with tears.
All you could do was be sorry and work through this dark place, because the love of your life deserved so much more than a sap of a boyfriend who just wanted the one thing he could never have.
The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence, was the only thing you could tell yourself.