(no subject)
I feel like I'm in exactly the same place I was in 2001. Subconciuosly destroying myself and not realizing it until it's too late. I just walked two miles home from a girl's place who I cared about while she was in the bathroom. I didn't say goodbye and I had no good reason to leave, it was just the most painful thing I could think of doing to myself. I don't feel I deserve to be happy. I didn't pay rent last month and I can't pay it this month. I guess it isn't until you've thrown everything away that you realize how much it was worth.