sometimes
i said this to someone earlier and sometimes i joke about it, but i sometimes feel that i've become the epitome of what so many people hate. i realize that that makes me sound like a martyr, and that perhaps i feel sorry for myself, but nothing could be further from the truth..but so many people in the past, both distant and recent have pointed to me and said, "you are the one who does this, and i hate it," why me? have i done something other than live my life that has made people want to bring me down? why am i judged? are these people jealous of something, or perhaps they feel it is their purpose to "put me in my place"? i don't know, it hurts most when your friends make you feel that way, that you've started to encompass what they hate, that you do things that makes them change their mind about you..i don't know how i got to this position in my life, but hopefully there will be a weekend in december when i can begin to change some peoples minds, and possibly my own. it will be a time when a different side of mick will be seen more that ever before, and if it becomes obvious that that mick too is not liked, then all i can say is i am sorry, I can only be myself, I'm sorry that's hell for you...