hey yall
holy shit... this thing still works... who reads it? anyone... well I am just suprised this thing still works.. I just caught up on some friends... one many... but it was fun... so let me tell you whats up... I joined a gym with my girlfriend yesterday... hopefully she likes it... and I am going to start buffing up and cutting back.. I met with a trainer today and he told me just to cut out my fat intake.... and I can do that... cause I wanna do this... and I have started hating smoking cigarettes and well I still enjoy my herbs... sorry... but it is just nice to have a destresser... some friends watch lost and drink a bottle of wine... or listen to some jams on the cpu and smoke a bowl... I realized to day that I am really not that immature and that my opinion doesn't fall on deaf ears and that I am truly an adult.. chelsea sometimes trys to point out things she thinks are immature, but they are truly just me enjoying life.. not abusing (sp) myself or others... I take responsiblity for my mistakes, I work hard, and I love the woman I am with.. it is nice... sure we have tuff times, but who doesn't... the dentist today told me that I am a lucky dude... he has known chelsea all of her life... awesome.. I am lucky for sure... :) and now the job is fun then not, tuff then smooth.. but thus is life.. and well my friends.. I like my job... so over all I am good.. I still don't have any true friends here.. but oh well... I do mean outside of my job and girl friend... cause honestly I have friends at work.. but work is work and play is play and folks I don't play anymore.. I just have fun at work... weird I know... so is it that because my job is my social life.. that my fun life can't exsist or is it that I am just getting both in one.... hot damn... I think I got this trial... folks... that is my mind set... amazing... okay so I have been down for like 2 months and there is no true reason for it, other than bordem.. but maybe it's not so much bordem as it is just that I am not enjoying the things that I do enjoy... I dunno if that truely reads right... but yeah... I have just been a bummer to be around... it blows... but I am disconnecting alot of associations with past life of this current life and trying to create positive associations.. so these connectors are in limbo creating a almost confusion and reflections... but I am trying to disconnect these memories... does that make sense? so anyways.. that is pretty much what has been going on in my head... you just enjoyed a collective thought of me... I even narrated it in my head to like a third party...