accidentally in love
worrying all the time. can i stop now? someone help me. comes with the territory. but still! sometimes it just seems like the circumstances are too weird for everything to be ok. usually i can come up with excuses as to why everything doesn't seem ok but is. until now.
weird thing, i've started the rosary up again. i haven't done it since i used to go to rosary at church every wednesday at seven. but i've started it. and it makes me feel better. and you know what? after hours of no call and tons of worry, i was on my third our father when he called to say he just got off work, had to go in for the day, didn't sleep a wink but was still alive. alive and exhausted in my book is ok, i'm just grateful alive is the keyword. it sucks to not be there to take care of him, and it sucks that the us marine corps is ruthless and he doesn't seem bothered by it cuz it's what he is. i'm bothered by it. he isn't in iraq right now, he can't be saving lives if he's so tired he'll collapse! now i know i'm exhaggerating but COME ON. friggin ridiculous.
on the other hand...all i've been doing at home is cleaning til i drop. clean clean clean. i actually kinda like it. makes me feel good. but once i'm done...i just want more to do. weird. i go thru phases where i only want to clean the downstairs...and not my room. now that i cleaned my room one day all i want to do is that and not the downstairs. and on top of that-i have to steam clean. god knows we've done it a million times and i still don't know how. shit...maybe sarah will be of assistance. i know she's going to pick it up for me. so hmmmm.....
SIX more days until san diego.i'm gonna start to be a full time nanny for another family, that lives just near the proving grounds. i'm meeting her in milford for lunch on monday, i'm very excited. they're a young couple, with a 20 month old and she's pregnant. i'm so excted! ah i said that already. and i'm excited about seeing max friday saturday and sunday. and i'm excited that life with my love is starting. i'm excited that my summer until now has been pretty laid back, and that i'm gonna start to earn more money. i'm excited that i like working out, i'm excited that my skin has some color. i'm excited that charlotte has started saying funny things and she's just goofy. i'm excited that sarah might get her new house because i know how much she wants it. i'm excited for life, and as long as me and the people around me get to keep living it, everything is going to be great.
weird thing, i've started the rosary up again. i haven't done it since i used to go to rosary at church every wednesday at seven. but i've started it. and it makes me feel better. and you know what? after hours of no call and tons of worry, i was on my third our father when he called to say he just got off work, had to go in for the day, didn't sleep a wink but was still alive. alive and exhausted in my book is ok, i'm just grateful alive is the keyword. it sucks to not be there to take care of him, and it sucks that the us marine corps is ruthless and he doesn't seem bothered by it cuz it's what he is. i'm bothered by it. he isn't in iraq right now, he can't be saving lives if he's so tired he'll collapse! now i know i'm exhaggerating but COME ON. friggin ridiculous.
on the other hand...all i've been doing at home is cleaning til i drop. clean clean clean. i actually kinda like it. makes me feel good. but once i'm done...i just want more to do. weird. i go thru phases where i only want to clean the downstairs...and not my room. now that i cleaned my room one day all i want to do is that and not the downstairs. and on top of that-i have to steam clean. god knows we've done it a million times and i still don't know how. shit...maybe sarah will be of assistance. i know she's going to pick it up for me. so hmmmm.....
SIX more days until san diego.i'm gonna start to be a full time nanny for another family, that lives just near the proving grounds. i'm meeting her in milford for lunch on monday, i'm very excited. they're a young couple, with a 20 month old and she's pregnant. i'm so excted! ah i said that already. and i'm excited about seeing max friday saturday and sunday. and i'm excited that life with my love is starting. i'm excited that my summer until now has been pretty laid back, and that i'm gonna start to earn more money. i'm excited that i like working out, i'm excited that my skin has some color. i'm excited that charlotte has started saying funny things and she's just goofy. i'm excited that sarah might get her new house because i know how much she wants it. i'm excited for life, and as long as me and the people around me get to keep living it, everything is going to be great.