you are cordially invited into my mind..
the thoughts i am having in my head right now are remarkable and it is imperitive that i write them down. fuck the fancy words though, who am i trying to charm. why would we invent new knowledge to know new knowledge. who invented words? can i invent one? would that mean that i am educated and intellegent, more intellegent than anyone else because they hadn't thought of it? no. it just means that i've invented my own inside joke. do you understand? we can give an image of intellegence but where is the real wisdom? i am convinced it is in my head and my philosophies so i'm just going to speak about how i think things really are and how they're all really related. coincidences. that's the meaning of life. that's where you can find meaning- in the symbols.. and they string us along through darkness and light and night and day until of course we've lost the game. some say love is the meaning of life but what is love? why can we not love ourselves and be satisfied>? were we put on this earth for everyone else but ourselves? is that our meaning. a human is alive so that another can be. just like the chicken and the egg. we are all co-dependent. another issue that's been driving me mad it manners. we all know we need eadh other but why others more than most and why must we be thankful for that which we receive and burdened by that which we give? can we not recognize collectively that we all must share. we all must understand. can we collectively as an entire society say this is this and that is exactly what it is, for sure. like a god. or a rubber duck. there will always be disagreement. this is why i wish everyone saw and understood things the way i see them. because then we would make real progress. or maybe i just would. maybe it isn't my vision at all but the collective vision of everyone. i want to know what you think. embarassment. why do we chose to hide what we beleive, are we afraid that there will be disagreement and misunderstanding. yes. that's my issue. i would post this to everybody but who would read this and decifer it's meaning? i try to find meaning in everything and it can be quite tiring. that's probably why i haven't decided to stick to my priorities lately. i would go back and re-read this right now because i want to scan through my entry for meaning. but i won't, i'll let it flow. i'm getting self-concious just thinking about showing my insides like this. to who? i don't know- this is the internet. the web. the spider's nest. every spider ever has an opening to this. they just need to fall into my web. just like how i think i fall in love with several people at once but none of whom know it or will agnoledge it. making me feel as though no one will ride up on there white horse in shiring armor to rescue me from myself. the horse doesn't need to be white. the armor doesn't need to be shining. and the symbols don't need to exist. i can understand the psychology of the story tales. truth is i really can't understand everyone. but i try. every symbol does not have the same meaning for any two individuals. an d symbols include words, objects, expressions. love.-an example. it's crasy the coincidences i'm experiencing though. they make me feel as though i'm headed in the right direction. whichever way that is. because it constantly is changing.