would you really rush out
for all intents and purposes, this weekend should have been really good. i was seeing friends from school, i was out doing things and going new places or eating delicious barbecue, at least. instead of feeling relaxed, though, i'm the opposite. anxious. not ready to start the week again.
i tried to work on my montpellier piece for rachel hall today and...ugh. i choked out a few hundred words and hated them all. i started to dislike the draft i mailed her - there are some worthy parts, but most of it is overexcited indulgent writing that tries too hard to make the city seem magical. when it's just a place.
and it's more than just a place, but i could say that about anywhere else i lived - oyster bay. geneseo. camp integrity, if you really want to get into it. i'm even getting frustruated trying to describe my frustruations, because i'm at a loss to articulate how i feel about the past four months. this is me throwing up my arms, saying this has absolutely everything to do with me, but i'm sorry. can it wait until tomorrow?
i tried to work on my montpellier piece for rachel hall today and...ugh. i choked out a few hundred words and hated them all. i started to dislike the draft i mailed her - there are some worthy parts, but most of it is overexcited indulgent writing that tries too hard to make the city seem magical. when it's just a place.
and it's more than just a place, but i could say that about anywhere else i lived - oyster bay. geneseo. camp integrity, if you really want to get into it. i'm even getting frustruated trying to describe my frustruations, because i'm at a loss to articulate how i feel about the past four months. this is me throwing up my arms, saying this has absolutely everything to do with me, but i'm sorry. can it wait until tomorrow?