Thoughts: Christmas 2010 5/5
“I never understood those stories - the real ones,” said Rose, popping a Jelly Baby in her mouth.
The Doctor did the same and saved the rest in his pocket for later. Raising one eyebrow, he considered the comment. “Well, they’re meant as cautionary tales. Like little red riding hood - deterrent tale against strangers.” He then took to scavenging inside his bigger on the inside pockets for his thermos of tea.
Rose sighed and took to helping him look for the tea (she, somehow, already knew about his hunt) in his other pocket. “Yeah - I get that, but the gore and violence, I mean, what’s all that about?” Unearthing the thermos, she offered the Doctor a smug smile and handed it over.
“Well, cautionary wouldn’t be cautionary without a threat, would it?” He grabbed the tea and made to offer her the first drink.
Nodding, she took a long sip of the warm sweet blend. She handed it back.
“Why are we talking about this anyway? It’s Christmas…shouldn’t we be talking about…snowmen, snow…gingerbread…turkey…blimey, I’m a bit hungry.” The Doctor’s stomach grumbled in agreement.
Rose groaned, “You’re impossible.” She flipped his coat open and dug into the inner pocket took out some biscuits. “We’re not talking about snowmen and turkey because it doesn’t feel like Christmas because we’re imprisoned and being prepared for execution in the morning, Doctor.” An exasperated sigh filled the room.
“Oh…right,” the Doctor let out a heavy breath.
“So, how about fixing that problem first, then we can talk Christmas and turkey and then we can go see about those fairy tales, yeah?” her voice, though tired, was amused and very un-worried.
The Doctor looked about the small prison cell and brandished the sonic screwdriver about. A hum and a beep later the lock holding them clicked open. He looked at her and smirked, “Alright then - what were you saying about a turkey?"
Rose laughed giddily as the Doctor pulled them to their feet and together they ran in search of the Tardis.
***
The Doctor looked about the large room. It was decorated with stockings and hanging lights. The large tree stood as the center of attention - its odor quite different than the plastic one he remembered in Jackie’s flat that Christmas. It was adorned in sporadic strands of tinsel, decorations shaped like candy and even a few handmade children’s ornaments. He had turned on the lights after waking up from a restless sleep - their glow showing against his skin.
Everything was quiet - life had become so different.
And so much better.
Barefoot steps coming down the hallway made his mouth blossom into a smile. Even if they didn’t live together, he’d know those steps. He knew that no matter where they were, he’d recognize her heart anywhere.
Rose sat next to him on their couch (he had a couch now) and cuddled into his side. Her head on his shoulder, she whispered, “Merry Christmas - you’re up early, it’s not even light out.”
He turned to place a kiss on her forehead, “Merry Christmas, Rose. I couldn’t stay asleep.”
“Howcome?” her brow furrowed - she’d be lying if she said a small part of her didn’t fear that he’d come to regret this life of theirs.
“Remember our first Christmas together?” he was distracting her from her worry - she decided to let it drop for now.
“Yeah - robotic Santas and Sycorax are hard to forget. Oh, and there was that small issue with you changing your face and all,” she rolled her eyes and trailed her fingertips along his arm. Rose loved him in anything he wore - but she had a soft spot for him like this, all disheveled in a white t shirt and striped jim jam bottoms. She stifled a giggle.
“Oh, you knew it was me from the beginning - you were just being human is all,” he teased.
“Oi! Insulting your species now, yeah?” her tone was meant to scold, but she couldn’t help but smile at him.
He grinned in return and hugged her closer to him. Close would never be close enough.
“Did you have any other Christmases without me?” it was a quiet question - one filled with sadness and fear. Things that he never wanted to hear anywhere near or from her again.
“Well…yeah. Unavoidable that,” he didn’t want to think too much about how he was then. He’d changed after Rose had left. The Doctor much rather preferred talking about the present which held so much more than he could ever have imagined for himself. Still, he knew that Rose held that fear that he’d regret being human and, most of all, staying with her. He also knew that she felt inadequate even though he spent every moment he could trying to prove it otherwise.
“Tell me about them?”
The Doctor knew he could change the subject and she’d let him get away with it - but he couldn’t do that to her…not anymore.
“Well, I had one just after…I lost you,” his voice broke slightly and she stilled her fingertips on his skin, choosing instead to hold his hand, “That’s when I first Donna. She saved me a bit then…and quite more than a bit after. But…it…it just wasn’t good.” They remained silent for awhile…memories of that dark time shadowing them both.
“Then there was the Titanic! Met some nice people...lost some nice people.” Rose squeezed his hand, their fingers intertwined.
The Doctor turned to look at her properly, “How about you?”
It was her turn to smile without mirth, “Each one was the same - mum, Pete, Tony and Mickey - no Doctor.” In a nutshell, she’d described just how much they had lost when they lost each other.
Unable to resist the urge to heal the heartbreak in her voice, he dipped down slightly to meet his lips with hers. It was a heated kiss - years of loss and broken hearts melted into something new beneath their touch. His hands, one in her hair and the other on her hip now, beckoned her closer. The Doctor felt her fingertips on his collar, trailing heated paths on his skin. For a moment, he felt the way he had back when he had two hearts - he could feel the earth’s rotation - the time lines swirling around him. It always felt that way when he touched her.
Their kiss was dangerously close to turning into something more - something he really, really wouldn’t mind just about then, but he knew their conversation hadn’t ended yet. He never intended to leave Rose wondering about his thoughts or feelings ever again.
He ended the kiss gently - fiery kisses melting into lingering chaste ones.
“You asked me something, before the ghosts of Christmases past, so to speak,” his voice was a whisper on her lips.
Rose’s lips were swollen from the kisses, their sight making him almost forget the situation altogether. He forced himself to remain focused, however - especially since she looked confused.
He smiled down at her, his wondrous, impossible, incredible girl, “You asked me why I couldn’t stay asleep, remember?”
A gleam of recognition in her eye, she simply nodded.
He leaned down and kissed her lips, “I was sitting here thinking how many moments I’ve missed with you because of the universe. Because there was always something else I just had to do. I thought of how amazing a human life can be with its blinking lights and hugs and caresses. Even with it’s 9 to 5 jobs and grocery lists. I missed so much….not just when I didn’t have you - but when I did as well.” The Doctor stared intensely down at Rose’s wide, disbelieving eyes. Her eyes held one question for him at the moment - one he knew without her having to ask.
Do you regret it?
And so he answered her honestly, “There is no one I’d rather live this life with than you. Now or ever. I couldn’t’ stay asleep because I don’t want to miss one moment. I woke up wanting to kiss you - and I wouldn’t have missed any of this for the world.”
They held each other tighter, the Doctor dipping down to kiss her as he planned to do for the rest of their lives.
***
I have to be honest - I was royally heartbroken with Journey's End. That was my first reaction to it - it was like Billie's interview where she compares it to Beauty and the Beast about how you're happy he's human again, but you miss the Beast. Anyway, since then I have grown to really love the Human Doctor because in my imagination, they're off in the parallel universe quite happy. In my opinion, he got the best end of the deal because he got to keep Rose. I dunno, I felt like sharing that partly because I am very sleepy right now, but also because I know that sometimes the Human Doctor gets a beating lol.
Anyway, I hope you enjoyed and that you are all having a wonderful holiday weekend! Sweet Doctor Who (more specifically, Doctor&Rose) dreams to all of you! ♥
The Doctor did the same and saved the rest in his pocket for later. Raising one eyebrow, he considered the comment. “Well, they’re meant as cautionary tales. Like little red riding hood - deterrent tale against strangers.” He then took to scavenging inside his bigger on the inside pockets for his thermos of tea.
Rose sighed and took to helping him look for the tea (she, somehow, already knew about his hunt) in his other pocket. “Yeah - I get that, but the gore and violence, I mean, what’s all that about?” Unearthing the thermos, she offered the Doctor a smug smile and handed it over.
“Well, cautionary wouldn’t be cautionary without a threat, would it?” He grabbed the tea and made to offer her the first drink.
Nodding, she took a long sip of the warm sweet blend. She handed it back.
“Why are we talking about this anyway? It’s Christmas…shouldn’t we be talking about…snowmen, snow…gingerbread…turkey…blimey, I’m a bit hungry.” The Doctor’s stomach grumbled in agreement.
Rose groaned, “You’re impossible.” She flipped his coat open and dug into the inner pocket took out some biscuits. “We’re not talking about snowmen and turkey because it doesn’t feel like Christmas because we’re imprisoned and being prepared for execution in the morning, Doctor.” An exasperated sigh filled the room.
“Oh…right,” the Doctor let out a heavy breath.
“So, how about fixing that problem first, then we can talk Christmas and turkey and then we can go see about those fairy tales, yeah?” her voice, though tired, was amused and very un-worried.
The Doctor looked about the small prison cell and brandished the sonic screwdriver about. A hum and a beep later the lock holding them clicked open. He looked at her and smirked, “Alright then - what were you saying about a turkey?"
Rose laughed giddily as the Doctor pulled them to their feet and together they ran in search of the Tardis.
***
The Doctor looked about the large room. It was decorated with stockings and hanging lights. The large tree stood as the center of attention - its odor quite different than the plastic one he remembered in Jackie’s flat that Christmas. It was adorned in sporadic strands of tinsel, decorations shaped like candy and even a few handmade children’s ornaments. He had turned on the lights after waking up from a restless sleep - their glow showing against his skin.
Everything was quiet - life had become so different.
And so much better.
Barefoot steps coming down the hallway made his mouth blossom into a smile. Even if they didn’t live together, he’d know those steps. He knew that no matter where they were, he’d recognize her heart anywhere.
Rose sat next to him on their couch (he had a couch now) and cuddled into his side. Her head on his shoulder, she whispered, “Merry Christmas - you’re up early, it’s not even light out.”
He turned to place a kiss on her forehead, “Merry Christmas, Rose. I couldn’t stay asleep.”
“Howcome?” her brow furrowed - she’d be lying if she said a small part of her didn’t fear that he’d come to regret this life of theirs.
“Remember our first Christmas together?” he was distracting her from her worry - she decided to let it drop for now.
“Yeah - robotic Santas and Sycorax are hard to forget. Oh, and there was that small issue with you changing your face and all,” she rolled her eyes and trailed her fingertips along his arm. Rose loved him in anything he wore - but she had a soft spot for him like this, all disheveled in a white t shirt and striped jim jam bottoms. She stifled a giggle.
“Oh, you knew it was me from the beginning - you were just being human is all,” he teased.
“Oi! Insulting your species now, yeah?” her tone was meant to scold, but she couldn’t help but smile at him.
He grinned in return and hugged her closer to him. Close would never be close enough.
“Did you have any other Christmases without me?” it was a quiet question - one filled with sadness and fear. Things that he never wanted to hear anywhere near or from her again.
“Well…yeah. Unavoidable that,” he didn’t want to think too much about how he was then. He’d changed after Rose had left. The Doctor much rather preferred talking about the present which held so much more than he could ever have imagined for himself. Still, he knew that Rose held that fear that he’d regret being human and, most of all, staying with her. He also knew that she felt inadequate even though he spent every moment he could trying to prove it otherwise.
“Tell me about them?”
The Doctor knew he could change the subject and she’d let him get away with it - but he couldn’t do that to her…not anymore.
“Well, I had one just after…I lost you,” his voice broke slightly and she stilled her fingertips on his skin, choosing instead to hold his hand, “That’s when I first Donna. She saved me a bit then…and quite more than a bit after. But…it…it just wasn’t good.” They remained silent for awhile…memories of that dark time shadowing them both.
“Then there was the Titanic! Met some nice people...lost some nice people.” Rose squeezed his hand, their fingers intertwined.
The Doctor turned to look at her properly, “How about you?”
It was her turn to smile without mirth, “Each one was the same - mum, Pete, Tony and Mickey - no Doctor.” In a nutshell, she’d described just how much they had lost when they lost each other.
Unable to resist the urge to heal the heartbreak in her voice, he dipped down slightly to meet his lips with hers. It was a heated kiss - years of loss and broken hearts melted into something new beneath their touch. His hands, one in her hair and the other on her hip now, beckoned her closer. The Doctor felt her fingertips on his collar, trailing heated paths on his skin. For a moment, he felt the way he had back when he had two hearts - he could feel the earth’s rotation - the time lines swirling around him. It always felt that way when he touched her.
Their kiss was dangerously close to turning into something more - something he really, really wouldn’t mind just about then, but he knew their conversation hadn’t ended yet. He never intended to leave Rose wondering about his thoughts or feelings ever again.
He ended the kiss gently - fiery kisses melting into lingering chaste ones.
“You asked me something, before the ghosts of Christmases past, so to speak,” his voice was a whisper on her lips.
Rose’s lips were swollen from the kisses, their sight making him almost forget the situation altogether. He forced himself to remain focused, however - especially since she looked confused.
He smiled down at her, his wondrous, impossible, incredible girl, “You asked me why I couldn’t stay asleep, remember?”
A gleam of recognition in her eye, she simply nodded.
He leaned down and kissed her lips, “I was sitting here thinking how many moments I’ve missed with you because of the universe. Because there was always something else I just had to do. I thought of how amazing a human life can be with its blinking lights and hugs and caresses. Even with it’s 9 to 5 jobs and grocery lists. I missed so much….not just when I didn’t have you - but when I did as well.” The Doctor stared intensely down at Rose’s wide, disbelieving eyes. Her eyes held one question for him at the moment - one he knew without her having to ask.
Do you regret it?
And so he answered her honestly, “There is no one I’d rather live this life with than you. Now or ever. I couldn’t’ stay asleep because I don’t want to miss one moment. I woke up wanting to kiss you - and I wouldn’t have missed any of this for the world.”
They held each other tighter, the Doctor dipping down to kiss her as he planned to do for the rest of their lives.
***
I have to be honest - I was royally heartbroken with Journey's End. That was my first reaction to it - it was like Billie's interview where she compares it to Beauty and the Beast about how you're happy he's human again, but you miss the Beast. Anyway, since then I have grown to really love the Human Doctor because in my imagination, they're off in the parallel universe quite happy. In my opinion, he got the best end of the deal because he got to keep Rose. I dunno, I felt like sharing that partly because I am very sleepy right now, but also because I know that sometimes the Human Doctor gets a beating lol.
Anyway, I hope you enjoyed and that you are all having a wonderful holiday weekend! Sweet Doctor Who (more specifically, Doctor&Rose) dreams to all of you! ♥