Prt 3
Shitty
its filling to eye level now, I see it in your eyes.
I see it rising higher now, that height that never dies.
my worry spreads like venom in you, I see you becoming stiff.
I injected all my love in you now the third and fourth and fifth.
you thought it'd never get back to you but it greets you face to face.
everything travels in circles my dear and it's planned a stop to your place.
eating all your words you've said and taking in much more,
watching as you plead and feel your tender become sore.
fight it not it is your time and rightfully its taken,
you thought I wouldn’t come back for you? well your sadly sadly mistaken.
grip is losing will to thrive and listlessly fades out,
tell me now was it worth it? what was this about?
a friend? I foe? or just another mindless "just in case"?
doesn’t matter now since you're bowing out with grace.
revenge the sweeter side of pain and guilt is far from feeling,
my wounds they mend and I grow strong but your wounds will not be healing.
minutes pass and you are limp but I never will desist,
from day one and first sight alas but love's first kiss.
it doomed you then and so yourself has caused it's self demise.
when I bring him up you will deny and look of utter surprise.
stop your lies and killing slowly of my hearts brass beating,
of my throat and hardy stand I sense your fears are feeding.
vampire of my dreams and more our bodies meant to be,
when your gone will you come back and promise that you'll bury me?
Bad
You think it makes you bad,
To say you want to kill?
You think it makes you bad,
To say you thirst for thrill?
You think it makes you bad,
To pretend your not all there?
You think it makes you bad,
To stomp your feet and swear?
You think it makes you bad,
But I know your just a trick.
I think you’re pretty sad,
So I guess you’re not so slick.
Lust
beast at heart I sense your tingle of shattered pride within your skin,
and yet there’s something morbid in you that my attraction it does win.
although a fear evolves on side lines close to love in play,
I know my inner women says to be alert and stay away.
alas! this does provoke me more my innocence to be precise,
and if this be a fatal path my childhood be my sacrifice,
you look at me as I do you and know we think the same,
you look right down past smiles of manners and pierce my hidden pain.
danger sits subsided in you and harbors in your eyes,
each time you speak I hear your words a; little more of me dies.
I try to stay strong though you are breaking through the mold,
this growing lust inside of me is getting hard to hold.
so let it spill and cover up the marks of former binding,
in you I hope and so do you each other we are finding.
Monster
A monster is inside of me,
This monster is my own,
It makes me hate myself,
When it gets me all alone.
I’d like to run away form it,
It knows me all too well,
For when I try to hide,
It knows just where I dwell.
Tells me all my secrets,
And everything I fear,
Tells me to admit,
Death will fall to those dear.
Dances in my nightmares,
Caresses bruising skin,
Whispers in my ear,
That I will never win.
Knows that I’m weakening,
He makes sure to show,
When I’m close to breaking,
My heart will be in tow.
My sanity is on the line,
His move is in the fashion,
For when he takes me piece by piece,
He over kills his ration.
Monster Madness
Each moment it is changing,
Receiving a new name,
Becoming something different,
To work within the game.
It shifts into a shape,
And screams itself to sleep,
For movement is a painful task,
Leaving wounds so deep.
Its eyes are getting clearer,
His senses keen so sharp,
And when he gains his feet,
He’ll rip you all apart.
Fear not he is in chains,
Restricting limbs from flight,
Yet I can not guarantee,
These chains will win the fight.
Its best to keep on walking,
You staring makes him blue,
And if it gets on to that point,
He’ll come looking for you.
Moon
My fingers grow so numb at night
It’s hard to taste the pain,
Yet when the blood starts flowing,
It never seems the same.
The circulation has it’s flaws,
I trick it every night,
And choke myself into the blackness,
Of my fading sight.
Sometimes it’s not enough you see,
For hands cave in too soon,
I try to cut out the life of me,
Before the waking moon,
Ode To Rob
I look into this vastness.
A mirror image peek.
I see my self within it,
As I begin to speak.
I question all the reasons,
And just how this began.
Why the clock has stopped it’s ticking.
And left a lonely man,
No answers are to comfort,
No one has said a word,
And this is when I realize,
That I had shot the bird.
It’s wings a bit too crippled.
Unable to get by,
This bird, my love side by side,
They seem to slowly die.
I’m watching in the mirror,
I sway from side to side.
Thinking of all of my doings,
Every word I lied.
It’s pierced a little deeper,
And severed at the seams.
But as I look down at my heart,
I see that it still gleams.
Our War
Our war is very violent,
Our war was made for men,
Our war is of the best and proud,
Our war was built for them.
Our war is something fierce
Our war is all we have to weep,
Our war is where we show no fear.
Our war is in our minds in sleep,
Our war gives us the honor,
Our war now set aside,
Our war makes us wonder,
Our war produced those men who died.
Our war out on the water,
Our war now hard at land,
Our war that made us objects,
Our war that deems us sand.
Our war was not our father,
Our war is not the case,
Our war is not a last resort,
Our war is humbled grace.
Our war is for the strongest,
Out war is for those men,
Our war is of the trained,
Our war will strike again.
Whore
did you hear my mind was tapping,
tapping at your window; door,
I swear I heard my mind was tapping,
tapping till my hearts galore.
can you sense my anger rising,
rising to your empty lies,
I knew you sensed my anger rising,
Rising, rising to the skies.
were my eyes a bit too cold,
cold beyond the devil’s core,
they were, they were my eyes were cold,
growing colder ever more,
was once my skin flaking paler,
paler at your feeble touch,
I see my skin it's flaking paler,
so pale I feel it is too much,
can you feel my boring holes,
holes right down into your soul,
my eyes they stair right at these holes,
that reached and thieved and raped and stole,
will you love my oh so tender,
tender at your lovely flesh,
I fear you will not love my tender,
if so we will not properly mesh,
you lie with grace as I leave you,
leave you on the chilling floor,
I say I said I must leave you,
leave you a trembling mess of a whore.
Why You Dont Write
Because it’s just a game for you and nothing takes on meaning. No matter what order you spill your words out on paper they all mean the exact same thing. Nothing. And in being so repetitive you yet again conform. But your conformity this time I admit is not of your consciousness and, therefore, I can’t truly hold you accountable, but I will anyways. Have you ever given me a reason not to take up on a chance to look down upon you and present myself as a superior to you? And as you shake your head but not in sight, in your mind, possibly the weakest possession in your grasp and loosening by seconds, question how you can let yourself fall into that pit. A vast pool of others do greet you with open arms, but not for your uniqueness, for which is not in your agenda, but their acceptance flows open in your direction because of trends that have engulfed your outer being, consuming you from the outside in. The most rare and unusual case you’d think but even that greatness is denied you. You become a slobbering pool of wet mass that no one bothers to clean up or even gaze in your general direction. You are the majority and society knows they are the ridiculed and yet you’ve fairly won that attention. Although that’s not the form you are seeking at least there is some progress. Who knows maybe someday when the world stops moving and the sun burns out, you can make it work for you. Then when the extraterrestrials come floating down upon our indecent little land they will look among the bones of severed bodies, bodies cut open and hollowed out for warmth that never seemed to be provided even in our most feeble attempts to simulate it for the children. Then once again the earth itself will realize that hell is not a force to be reckon with, because we hate to accept it but it’s all we ever wanted to be. To get what we want and show no remorse for the deeds in which we sacrifice to accomplish it. We want to kill, we want to maim, but again society shakes it’s motherly finger at us and instead we look to each other for rebellion.
Wow I can Be Mushy Too!
I long to find this love of mine that’s quarantine from me,
And if I found that love of mine I’d kindly set it free,
It’s be the reason to survive, to keep on pushing through.
You’d be the love of my life and I would be yours too.
Always caring for another always sharing all the girth,
From pain to joy through and through and even through a birth.
A perfect blend of you and I this child is us combined,
My only wish is that this child’s love never be confined.
Cuz when it’s free it is a numbing mind blowing bliss.
The day you know the feeling of your true loves first kiss.