Jan 13, 2017 00:44
I'm behind. I feel like I'm behind on everything lately.
I'm okay...mostly? I had a long conversation with my friend Eric tonight about how we're both doing. Personally, I'm okay. I think my future is pretty good. But I'm fucking terrified for the country and the world, and I can't really enjoy my own triumphs as much as I'd like. I think I'll still be here when we're done dealing with the clusterfuck that is our government...in one, four, or twenty years...and I think I'll be living well in that time, unless catastrophe befalls Beaverton directly, or our population in ways we can't see now. I do recognize this is a possibility. So, yeah, it's all qualified.
I lost a real estate client this week. That's a huge bummer, and if I had the energy, I would fight for it. The reason he's bailing is very much a misunderstanding on his part, but I feel like reeling him back in would lead to at best an awkward and uncomfortable continued relationship. I just...no. I do need to find something to energize me, though, because I need to have a better professional year than I did in 2016. I need to network more aggressively. I need to not get sick so much...I need to feel better about myself...I need...to cry for a little while.
I'm also thinking about moving my journal to another site. But that seems overwhelming. This is 15 years of me. :/
depression