(no subject)
Saturday was a nice productive day, with exactly the right amount of non-lazy leisure time mixed in. Toby cooked while I cleaned up a lot, then we did some chores together, and it was just a really good day. I don't often have whole weekend days with him, because he usually spends some portion of the weekend with his other partner. People ask me all the time how I can handle this, how I don't get jealous, etc. Here's the thing -- I don't mind that he's not here all the time, because I like my alone time. I like spreading out in the bed. I like not feeling like I should be "on" for the person I'm with. So I don't mind that. Emotionally, he and I are on the same wavelength about monogamy. It's just not how we're wired. I can love someone else without that diminishing how I feel about him, so I know and understand that his other partners don't detract from our relationship. And I know that if I need him, he'll be here. I also trust his other girlfriend to understand that. She and I have only hung out a few times, but we like each other just fine. We just don't have a lot of social crossover. But we work together really well -- she's always been flexible about schedule things, and I believe I always have been, too.
Right now I'm not dating anyone else, and not really looking to, but that doesn't mean I crave monogamy. I get crushy pretty often, and I like that there's room for that to happen for me without it having to be a big paradigm change for everyone. If I date someone else, I'll fit them into the time when Toby is with C. But for now, I like being with Toby whenever I can be, and I like my alone time when his schedule creates it for me. I do miss Toby when he's not around, but not in an I-need-him-here kind of way. More in an I-hope-I-remember-to-tell-him-about-XYZ-things-when-I-see-him-next way.
Anyway the whole point of that was to say that having an entire day with Toby meant we could get a lot of things done -- including a nap! -- and I feel good about all we managed. Today was a lot lazier, but I did make some progress in my crafts anyway. And I went to the gym for an hour and a half. So not entirely lazy. Just net negative on housework. Tomorrow (er, later today), my friend Keith is coming over to help me fix a problem with my sliding glass door. He's a very accomplished contractor and I'd feel bad about asking him for favors like this except that he repeatedly assures me that it gives him joy and a sense of purpose to do such things for his friends, so! He'll be coming over sometime to lube my back door so it'll hopefully open easier. His words. Maybe that's why he wants to do favors for me....
Anyway, tomorrow, today, whatever, should be a productive day. That's the goal, anyway!