About Transformers Slash (Dead Horse)
I totally have a thing for the TF movie 'verse.
I also love Bee/'Kaela, Sam/'Bee, and Sam/'Kaela/'Bee, and all the permutations thereof. And flashback!Megatron noncon references. YOW.
But this fandom also makes me sadfaces. Why?
Bee/Sam and Sam/Bee are m/m, and as such, are normally written by girls. Shit, some guy, bounce your sweet gay ass out here and prove me wrong, I'm spoilin' for a fight with someone I've never met before, COME THE FUCK ON.
*Ahem.* Anyway, it's sorta fandom!core!knowledge that chicks write the m/m.
But. Like. Mikaela is made of hot. And funny and tough and smartish and mechanically inclined! And they not only totally ignore her, they also make her break up with Sam, die horribly, commit suicide or do all three at the same time somehow. Why they don't just make 'Bee run over the evil, evil girl bitch taking away his twu wubv, I'll never know. Though it would make a pretty awesome darkfic or noir!fic, in which 'Bee is a hot little roadster ala` 1938.
And I'd heard for a while, about three years now, off and on, that slash writers of TEH BOI BUTTSECKS...are homophobic. Or, y'know, lesbophobic or biphobic or whatever word is in vogue to describe what I like to sum up as:
BOYS ARE HOT AND GIRLS ARE ICKY AND SMELLY AND SHOULD DIE-itis.
Why? She's delicious and wonderful and her hammering poor clueless Sam into the backseat would be the most awesome threesome. Seriously.
But apparently I cannot have that in movie 'verse, because girls are icky. Even when they do the "proper" het thing and fuck their canon male love interest.
What?
Also, even if we move away from the subject of Mikaela the Tasty.
This whole, " 'Bee has a hologram projection that allows him to get it on with Sam because it's leik his HUMAN FORM LOL".
You're completely ignoring that even in human form ftw, 'Bee will have a robot's psychology, whatever the fuck that actually is--it doesn't magically make him into Anime` Uke the Spectacular. Bitchpls.
Also, the car washing as mutual masturbation? Okay, fine, you found one of my buttons. Did you want a fucking medal? Seriously. I read that ENTIRE COMM, and every fourth story is a car wash scene.
Yes, okay? It's really hot. Really. But nine thousand fics of the same scenario later, it loses its special sparkle. Let the idea breathe awhile! Some new and interesting concepts might come to you.
That don't involve Mikaela being dead or invisible or moved away or something.
Pls.
See?
Simultaneously made of both awesome and hot. Please to stop acting like she doesn't exist! They can all three get along. Fo' real, yo.
I also love Bee/'Kaela, Sam/'Bee, and Sam/'Kaela/'Bee, and all the permutations thereof. And flashback!Megatron noncon references. YOW.
But this fandom also makes me sadfaces. Why?
Bee/Sam and Sam/Bee are m/m, and as such, are normally written by girls. Shit, some guy, bounce your sweet gay ass out here and prove me wrong, I'm spoilin' for a fight with someone I've never met before, COME THE FUCK ON.
*Ahem.* Anyway, it's sorta fandom!core!knowledge that chicks write the m/m.
But. Like. Mikaela is made of hot. And funny and tough and smartish and mechanically inclined! And they not only totally ignore her, they also make her break up with Sam, die horribly, commit suicide or do all three at the same time somehow. Why they don't just make 'Bee run over the evil, evil girl bitch taking away his twu wubv, I'll never know. Though it would make a pretty awesome darkfic or noir!fic, in which 'Bee is a hot little roadster ala` 1938.
And I'd heard for a while, about three years now, off and on, that slash writers of TEH BOI BUTTSECKS...are homophobic. Or, y'know, lesbophobic or biphobic or whatever word is in vogue to describe what I like to sum up as:
BOYS ARE HOT AND GIRLS ARE ICKY AND SMELLY AND SHOULD DIE-itis.
Why? She's delicious and wonderful and her hammering poor clueless Sam into the backseat would be the most awesome threesome. Seriously.
But apparently I cannot have that in movie 'verse, because girls are icky. Even when they do the "proper" het thing and fuck their canon male love interest.
What?
Also, even if we move away from the subject of Mikaela the Tasty.
This whole, " 'Bee has a hologram projection that allows him to get it on with Sam because it's leik his HUMAN FORM LOL".
You're completely ignoring that even in human form ftw, 'Bee will have a robot's psychology, whatever the fuck that actually is--it doesn't magically make him into Anime` Uke the Spectacular. Bitchpls.
Also, the car washing as mutual masturbation? Okay, fine, you found one of my buttons. Did you want a fucking medal? Seriously. I read that ENTIRE COMM, and every fourth story is a car wash scene.
Yes, okay? It's really hot. Really. But nine thousand fics of the same scenario later, it loses its special sparkle. Let the idea breathe awhile! Some new and interesting concepts might come to you.
That don't involve Mikaela being dead or invisible or moved away or something.
Pls.
See?
Simultaneously made of both awesome and hot. Please to stop acting like she doesn't exist! They can all three get along. Fo' real, yo.