(no subject)
I feel like I like a lot of friends when they're in those strange moments of life. There are times when people need help, or they're feeling a sort of stillness, need a temporary companion, or just lonesome and having a hard time relating to anyone else or have anyone listen to them. It's hard to think about leaving when I can't but help myself but be cheerful, supportive, and entertaining. I feel like though I may have to leave, and I feel worse off that I can't tell them why. On the way I've made a lot of reckless decisions. I almost can't help it because I'm stupidly idealistic or scared, I have this want to do unconventional things, but really it's because I'm missing something too. I'm not trying to paint a picture that the people I know are not exceptional because they are, but I won't be able to explain why. Hell I don't understand it myself. I'm just weary, I feel very weary of it all, and I don't think here or home will help me. I just got to go and reconcile things.