A new paradigm in my life
I am tired of living a depressed life. You shouldn’t have to go through this world stressed, worried, and on the verge of getting an ulcer because of what’s being thrown at you. I’ve had nothing but dirt and crap thrown at me for the past 6 months (even longer than that, but for now we’ll just deal with this timeframe). Now I’m done with it. I’m shaking it off and stepping up. I’ll take all of that dirt, learn from it, and lay the foundation for a better future for me. One where all that dirt is beneath me and no longer pressing down on me. And I’ll never have to think about it again.
A few weeks ago, I went to bed and had one of the greatest rests of my life. It was shorter than the amount of sleep I normally get, but it was completely stress free! Why, you may ask? I have a theory: there are certain individuals where I stay that make life a living hell. Hypocrisy, anger and shouting abound. And then they wonder why I’m never around, when this is all I can see their lives filled with. Why would I surround myself with that? Well, that night, they were gone - away on vacation. And I couldn’t have slept any better! So I’m realizing that perhaps not only is my current living situation not enjoyable (no kidding), but it probably isn’t the healthiest for me either.
So a decision has been made… or rather, made for me. A two week ultimatum to which I am more than happy to oblige. If someone offered you a place to stay on the conditions that you would be forced to be miserable and completely scattered the entire time, or a way out to where you weren’t sure where you’d be, but you knew you’d be happier, less stressed, and moving forward to a better future, which one would you take? I’m choosing the fork in the road that doesn’t take me to a life of living hell. I’ve been told that the anger, the yelling, and the stress would subside if I were just around more often, but that simply wasn’t the case. I can only stand in front of a firing squad for so long while they promise to drop their weapons if I stay there. Well I’m still being aimed at, and there’s no sign that they’re going to back down. If anything, they’ve chosen to load and cock their guns now. Well fuck that! I am not sticking around to see the end of this show.
The dictator and his trusty sidekick are banishing me from his kingdom of hell. And I’m leaving with trumpets blaring! I only hope that the innocent ones left behind aren’t abused any more than what they already have been.