I loved you with a fire red..now it’s turning blue.
[mood| 
tired ]
Not only am I procrastinating on school work..I’m even procrastinating on updating this thing. My apologies to the avid readers..although there must be just a few of you out there who would want to read what I have to say in the span of 6 years. I’ve been reading my earlier entries and I am just amazed. Was I really so...dare I say it...naïve? It was either one guy after the other or just...one guy. How things have changed..or at least I’d like to believe things have changed. I’d like to believe that within the past few years I’ve matured enough to handle some revelations that would have reduced me to blinding tears years before.
Just last week I found out that someone is expecting. My reaction? The feeling of having the wind knocked out of you hundreds of times. Was I expecting this news? Well yes..I was expecting it. I just wasn’t expecting it NOW. I was expecting it a couple of years from now. I sat myself down and told myself it was okay to cry. But for some reason I just couldn’t. Maybe it’s because I’ve exhausted my limit last year that my tear ducts are dead.
I really don’t know how to react. I really don’t know how to feel. Should I feel depressed? Angry? Upset? Jealous? Tell me...how should I feel so I could get it over with? I would just like to get this phase of my life over and done with. I am EXHAUSTED.
I sound like a broken record, don’t I? One minute I’m promising not to talk about him so it’ll be easier for me to forget and go on with my life. Another minute it’s all I talk about. I’m very much aware he’s broken all ties with me..but why can’t I when it comes to him? It seems so easy for him to pretend I don’t exist. Why can’t I just do the same?
I’m sorry, my readers, that you always have to read about him. Even I’m getting sick of it. I don’t know why I even bother.
I dedicate this song to you because...it really is too late for you to apologize...
"Apologize"
-OneRepublic-
I'm holding on your rope
Got me ten feet off the ground
I'm hearing what you say
But I just can't make a sound
You tell me that you need me
Then you go and cut me down, but wait
You tell me that you're sorry
Didn't think I'd turn around and say...
That it's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late
I'd take another chance, take a fall,
Take a shot for you
And I need you like a heart needs a beat
But it's nothing new
I loved you with a fire red - now it's turning blue
And you say
"Sorry" like the angel Heaven let me think was you,
But I'm afraid...
It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late
It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize,it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late
I'm holding on your rope
Got me ten feet off the ground...
tired ]
Not only am I procrastinating on school work..I’m even procrastinating on updating this thing. My apologies to the avid readers..although there must be just a few of you out there who would want to read what I have to say in the span of 6 years. I’ve been reading my earlier entries and I am just amazed. Was I really so...dare I say it...naïve? It was either one guy after the other or just...one guy. How things have changed..or at least I’d like to believe things have changed. I’d like to believe that within the past few years I’ve matured enough to handle some revelations that would have reduced me to blinding tears years before.
Just last week I found out that someone is expecting. My reaction? The feeling of having the wind knocked out of you hundreds of times. Was I expecting this news? Well yes..I was expecting it. I just wasn’t expecting it NOW. I was expecting it a couple of years from now. I sat myself down and told myself it was okay to cry. But for some reason I just couldn’t. Maybe it’s because I’ve exhausted my limit last year that my tear ducts are dead.
I really don’t know how to react. I really don’t know how to feel. Should I feel depressed? Angry? Upset? Jealous? Tell me...how should I feel so I could get it over with? I would just like to get this phase of my life over and done with. I am EXHAUSTED.
I sound like a broken record, don’t I? One minute I’m promising not to talk about him so it’ll be easier for me to forget and go on with my life. Another minute it’s all I talk about. I’m very much aware he’s broken all ties with me..but why can’t I when it comes to him? It seems so easy for him to pretend I don’t exist. Why can’t I just do the same?
I’m sorry, my readers, that you always have to read about him. Even I’m getting sick of it. I don’t know why I even bother.
I dedicate this song to you because...it really is too late for you to apologize...
"Apologize"
-OneRepublic-
I'm holding on your rope
Got me ten feet off the ground
I'm hearing what you say
But I just can't make a sound
You tell me that you need me
Then you go and cut me down, but wait
You tell me that you're sorry
Didn't think I'd turn around and say...
That it's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late
I'd take another chance, take a fall,
Take a shot for you
And I need you like a heart needs a beat
But it's nothing new
I loved you with a fire red - now it's turning blue
And you say
"Sorry" like the angel Heaven let me think was you,
But I'm afraid...
It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late
It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize,it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late
I'm holding on your rope
Got me ten feet off the ground...