Si fuera la lluvia, ahogaria el mundo.
My sleep is so fucked up. I wake up from these dreams and I feel like I haven't rested at all.
(i don't know how to express how beautiful she is. the last time she was here, i was left with that sinking feeling of jealousy. jealous of the hand she's holding, jealous of those whispers in her ear. darling girl, how many people have watched you from your backseat and wished to be your cigarette? how many boys have looked at you and cried because you are so beautiful? i miss you all the time. i dreamt about your cigarettes last night. i know now that no one could ever have you, but if you let me pretend that i did, just for a minute, if i had that opportunity, i wouldn't know what to do with myself. i don't know how to love you to your face. but you are the only person who keeps coming back. and one day you will come back, and we will both be free of attachments. and maybe then i'll know just what to do and say to let you know that i'm in love with you, i have been for years, and i will be for the rest of my life)
I feel out of sync with the world. Nothing makes me happy anymore. I don't see the Joy that I used to see. I wonder if maybe this is it, maybe this is how it will be for the rest of my life. Maybe this is the end of the rope. I'm out of ideas and I've dropped the line I was holding. I'm done, finished. Now all I can do is live.
I am waiting for the end of the world.
(i don't know how to express how beautiful she is. the last time she was here, i was left with that sinking feeling of jealousy. jealous of the hand she's holding, jealous of those whispers in her ear. darling girl, how many people have watched you from your backseat and wished to be your cigarette? how many boys have looked at you and cried because you are so beautiful? i miss you all the time. i dreamt about your cigarettes last night. i know now that no one could ever have you, but if you let me pretend that i did, just for a minute, if i had that opportunity, i wouldn't know what to do with myself. i don't know how to love you to your face. but you are the only person who keeps coming back. and one day you will come back, and we will both be free of attachments. and maybe then i'll know just what to do and say to let you know that i'm in love with you, i have been for years, and i will be for the rest of my life)
I feel out of sync with the world. Nothing makes me happy anymore. I don't see the Joy that I used to see. I wonder if maybe this is it, maybe this is how it will be for the rest of my life. Maybe this is the end of the rope. I'm out of ideas and I've dropped the line I was holding. I'm done, finished. Now all I can do is live.
I am waiting for the end of the world.