i really dislike this medium....
...it allows for too much misinterpretation.
BUT. it seems like one of the most efficient method to talk to y'all.
I love J, R, A, and C. J, you are the first real best friend I have ever had. And after a certain conversation following a rather abrupt message left on my phone last night, I'm realizing that there is a lot of gossip going on that has created this horrible schism in our friendship that I have had absolutely no say in. that's not fair.
if you want to know what is going on with me, CALL ME. please. please. please.
I was excited to move out not because I was moving OUT of the appartment, but because I was moving IN with my mom and Mike, where I get to be a kid, not an adult (fending off verbal and physical attacks on my mom and raising my siblings) for the first time since I was...ten. I get to hang out with my lil brother and sister before I move to Portland for three years. I get to have a dad for the first time EVER. (I had my FIRST father-daughter talk last night...it was amazing)
IT'S NOT ABOUT ANY OF YOU. so stop making it about you. this is my life. and I'm excited to finally be doing what my heart has been too afraid to step out and do...I'm persuing my dreams. please, be my friends and be happy for me. TALK TO ME.
I won't be a part of a ring of gossip and stumble over myself to fix hard feelings over a scenario that has been created in the mind. that's not real, and it's not my responsibility. I have attempted to make ammends for any wrong I might have done, and was told the timing wasn't right. so...I've waited.
it is not my intention to move to Portland and never see any of you again...I would be heartbroken. shoot.
tell me what you want from me, and I'll do it. If you don't tell me, how am I supposed to know? how am I not expected to fail miserably at being a good friend when i am left clueless as to what is needed from me. don't be afraid to tell me...yell it in my face! seriously. i need a good kick in the shins sometimes;)
so, how are we going to mend this? what do you need from me? please know that this is written with absolute sincerity. I love you.
your friend,
Jewlz.
BUT. it seems like one of the most efficient method to talk to y'all.
I love J, R, A, and C. J, you are the first real best friend I have ever had. And after a certain conversation following a rather abrupt message left on my phone last night, I'm realizing that there is a lot of gossip going on that has created this horrible schism in our friendship that I have had absolutely no say in. that's not fair.
if you want to know what is going on with me, CALL ME. please. please. please.
I was excited to move out not because I was moving OUT of the appartment, but because I was moving IN with my mom and Mike, where I get to be a kid, not an adult (fending off verbal and physical attacks on my mom and raising my siblings) for the first time since I was...ten. I get to hang out with my lil brother and sister before I move to Portland for three years. I get to have a dad for the first time EVER. (I had my FIRST father-daughter talk last night...it was amazing)
IT'S NOT ABOUT ANY OF YOU. so stop making it about you. this is my life. and I'm excited to finally be doing what my heart has been too afraid to step out and do...I'm persuing my dreams. please, be my friends and be happy for me. TALK TO ME.
I won't be a part of a ring of gossip and stumble over myself to fix hard feelings over a scenario that has been created in the mind. that's not real, and it's not my responsibility. I have attempted to make ammends for any wrong I might have done, and was told the timing wasn't right. so...I've waited.
it is not my intention to move to Portland and never see any of you again...I would be heartbroken. shoot.
tell me what you want from me, and I'll do it. If you don't tell me, how am I supposed to know? how am I not expected to fail miserably at being a good friend when i am left clueless as to what is needed from me. don't be afraid to tell me...yell it in my face! seriously. i need a good kick in the shins sometimes;)
so, how are we going to mend this? what do you need from me? please know that this is written with absolute sincerity. I love you.
your friend,
Jewlz.