Emotional Clusterfuck.
So all my ladies out there, and my fellas too, I'm pretty sure we've all been to the point where we're so confused that it would seem as if the only possible conclusion would be to START OVER.
I always want what I can't have and then when I get it, I don't want it.
Is that as fucked up as I think it is?
I think I found something I want.
He's hilarious, but what stand up comedian isn't? My mom approves of him, he's cute, all he wears is Hollister and Abercrombie which at some points is incredibly gay, He just quit Cingular, He's smart, He now works at Hollister, He's in a band, He plays drums, He can RAP (If you don't believe me call my voicemail...lol.), He's in school, He's good at making out, He has a new red Civic, He's talented, He's an actor, He has cool friends, He's laid back, He's not an alcoholic, He high on life, He's not a whore, He's blonde, He's 19.
So in other words, he's way out of my league.
So why does he call me? And why do I have to empty my text messages out a couple times a day because he texts me so much? Why does he go out of his way to make me laugh? Why does he bring me out to lunch? Why did he drive up here to stand in a parking lot with me and play me songs on the guitar? Why do I have a little note in my purse asking for the beach, dinner, and desert with the promise of flowers?
Because I'm obviously a straight up G, and incredibly lucky.
Then why is it that now that it seems he's interested, I'm not quite sure.
Is it because he could honestly be a genuine good guy? Probably.
Quite clearly I'm very uncomfortable and unfamiliar with that whole idea.
-----
I've put 66 dollars in my tank since fucking Friday.
Today is Thursday.
I have a little over a quarter tank.
I need a job.
Paying for gas will be the death of me.
Fuck Explorers.
I always want what I can't have and then when I get it, I don't want it.
Is that as fucked up as I think it is?
I think I found something I want.
He's hilarious, but what stand up comedian isn't? My mom approves of him, he's cute, all he wears is Hollister and Abercrombie which at some points is incredibly gay, He just quit Cingular, He's smart, He now works at Hollister, He's in a band, He plays drums, He can RAP (If you don't believe me call my voicemail...lol.), He's in school, He's good at making out, He has a new red Civic, He's talented, He's an actor, He has cool friends, He's laid back, He's not an alcoholic, He high on life, He's not a whore, He's blonde, He's 19.
So in other words, he's way out of my league.
So why does he call me? And why do I have to empty my text messages out a couple times a day because he texts me so much? Why does he go out of his way to make me laugh? Why does he bring me out to lunch? Why did he drive up here to stand in a parking lot with me and play me songs on the guitar? Why do I have a little note in my purse asking for the beach, dinner, and desert with the promise of flowers?
Because I'm obviously a straight up G, and incredibly lucky.
Then why is it that now that it seems he's interested, I'm not quite sure.
Is it because he could honestly be a genuine good guy? Probably.
Quite clearly I'm very uncomfortable and unfamiliar with that whole idea.
-----
I've put 66 dollars in my tank since fucking Friday.
Today is Thursday.
I have a little over a quarter tank.
I need a job.
Paying for gas will be the death of me.
Fuck Explorers.