Commandments for the Surf Industry
While I can hardly claim to be an industry insider or even a surfer that should be paid that much attention to (unless you're being stupid too paddle out directly behind me when a cleanup set is approaching) but that doesn't mean I don't get to write commandments. I have been surfing for eight years though so I have experienced first hand some of the annoying industry practices which justifies railing against them. Plus I like making commandment lists.
1) If thou callest thyself a surf shop thou shalt have a minimum of 25 boards for sale. If thou haveth less thou shalt call thyself "t-shirt shop with some boards"
2) Thou shalt always have someone prepared to sell boards in thy shop. Thou shalt not tell thy customers "the guy who knows about boards isn't here today try coming back tomorrow".
3) If thou makest tufflites thou shalt understand the properties of the material and not maketh them too thick.
4) Hide not the true nature of thy boards. If thou makest boards without stringers (tufflites, epoxies, TL2s or carbon fibers) thou shalt not paint a line down the middle.
5) Let not more than seven sunsets pass before a ding repair is completed if thou chargeth a fee.
6) Thou shalt have no gods before the Ocean. Decorate not thy boards with symbols of other lesser faiths. (That means you everybody who insists on putting jesus fish on their boards).
7) Thou shalt not paint over a damaged board to sell it as new to a gullible kook. Even if thou thinkest that he/she really deservest it.
8) Thou shalt have the tools and materials necessary to repair any type of board that thy selleth on thy premises.
9) Thou shalt selleth swimsuits that can realistically be worn under a wetsuit without leading to horrendous chafing.
10) Thou shalt not expect thy customers to pay extra for a board just because a pro may have once owned it. Would thou expect them to pay extra for a wetsuit that a pro may have peed in?
1) If thou callest thyself a surf shop thou shalt have a minimum of 25 boards for sale. If thou haveth less thou shalt call thyself "t-shirt shop with some boards"
2) Thou shalt always have someone prepared to sell boards in thy shop. Thou shalt not tell thy customers "the guy who knows about boards isn't here today try coming back tomorrow".
3) If thou makest tufflites thou shalt understand the properties of the material and not maketh them too thick.
4) Hide not the true nature of thy boards. If thou makest boards without stringers (tufflites, epoxies, TL2s or carbon fibers) thou shalt not paint a line down the middle.
5) Let not more than seven sunsets pass before a ding repair is completed if thou chargeth a fee.
6) Thou shalt have no gods before the Ocean. Decorate not thy boards with symbols of other lesser faiths. (That means you everybody who insists on putting jesus fish on their boards).
7) Thou shalt not paint over a damaged board to sell it as new to a gullible kook. Even if thou thinkest that he/she really deservest it.
8) Thou shalt have the tools and materials necessary to repair any type of board that thy selleth on thy premises.
9) Thou shalt selleth swimsuits that can realistically be worn under a wetsuit without leading to horrendous chafing.
10) Thou shalt not expect thy customers to pay extra for a board just because a pro may have once owned it. Would thou expect them to pay extra for a wetsuit that a pro may have peed in?