here we go.
So, I was gonna wait a day or two for some of the things I wanted to say to people, but Im going to move one up for today. This will probably bore all but one of you.
Linda,
I dont know if that last entry had anything to do with me, but the part about the end of last year being bad made me think it probably did. Along with the fact that I am often petty, bitchy, and have no reason for it. I dont know why things have changed between us, or why when we get over it on our own terms we never really talk about it after the fact. I do know, that once we do get back to being friends...it always feels right- like old times. I know it wont always be like that, and Im sure we will get distant again sometime. (We used to think that was impossible. things change, huh?). I like to tell myself the reason I get mad or frustrated at people is a complicated subject - but its not, its just I dont really know why I get mad sometimes. Maybe I get bored? jealous? emo? or just plain bitchy. I do want to say Im sorry. Im sorry for the shear apathy I showed when blowing you off last semester for reasons that seemed acceptable at the time. I regret so much from last semester and how we didnt hang out as much. I need to grow up and realize that were not as much the same as we used to be, and that doesnt mean we cant be as good a friends as we used to be. I need to realize that I cant get mad at people for not caring when I dont let them know somethings wrong, thats a big problem. But the reason for this is just let you know youre friendship is one of the best - if not the best - Ive ever had. I love you, I think you have a kind heart, I think youre smart, I know you would be there for me if I needed you, and I know I do my best to be there for you- while sometimes I feel I fall short because I tend to not be a good friend at times. But this is me saying Im sorry. This is me admitting what I hate to admit. I hope I you get what Im saying, Im sure you do.
<3
Linda,
I dont know if that last entry had anything to do with me, but the part about the end of last year being bad made me think it probably did. Along with the fact that I am often petty, bitchy, and have no reason for it. I dont know why things have changed between us, or why when we get over it on our own terms we never really talk about it after the fact. I do know, that once we do get back to being friends...it always feels right- like old times. I know it wont always be like that, and Im sure we will get distant again sometime. (We used to think that was impossible. things change, huh?). I like to tell myself the reason I get mad or frustrated at people is a complicated subject - but its not, its just I dont really know why I get mad sometimes. Maybe I get bored? jealous? emo? or just plain bitchy. I do want to say Im sorry. Im sorry for the shear apathy I showed when blowing you off last semester for reasons that seemed acceptable at the time. I regret so much from last semester and how we didnt hang out as much. I need to grow up and realize that were not as much the same as we used to be, and that doesnt mean we cant be as good a friends as we used to be. I need to realize that I cant get mad at people for not caring when I dont let them know somethings wrong, thats a big problem. But the reason for this is just let you know youre friendship is one of the best - if not the best - Ive ever had. I love you, I think you have a kind heart, I think youre smart, I know you would be there for me if I needed you, and I know I do my best to be there for you- while sometimes I feel I fall short because I tend to not be a good friend at times. But this is me saying Im sorry. This is me admitting what I hate to admit. I hope I you get what Im saying, Im sure you do.
<3