Ficlet - The O.C.- The Commencement (Trey/Seth)
Title: The Commencement
Author: Jewel21
Rating : NC-17
Show : The O.C.
Genre: Angst and slash
Pairing: Seth/Trey
Type: Complete.
Disclaimer: I don't own The OC. It belongs to a bunch of people I don't know and Fox.
Summary: Seth finds out... angst ensues.
Author's Notes: This is the final part of my Trey/Seth series. To everyone who has read and commented, thanks so much! Special thanks also goes out to my beta, Flidais. You're the greatest hon! And to Scarlet who answered all my questions and addressed all my concerns. And to Zaloom and Lynn for liking this story and asking me when I'm going to update on a regular basis.
The Commencement by jewel21
It's been three days since Seth last saw Trey. Three days since they'd had mind-blowing sex on Ryan's bed. Three days of replaying that night over and over in his mind, hoping Trey would come by and help ease the the ache. Three days in which he'd had to resolve the problem himself, much to his dismay. School is starting in a couple of weeks, and Seth knows he'll be busy with school work and college applications, and their chances of being together will be practically non-existent. And, Seth has no idea how he's going to shift his focus onto school and college when all he wants to do is immerse himself in Trey 24/7. Of course, he needs Trey to quit the disappearing act in order to do that.
Seth finds himself sighing as he thinks about Trey for the hundredth time that day, thoughts of school and college promptly forgotten. The other night had been fantastic. Sure, he hadn't gotten Trey's dick anywhere near his ass, but what had happened had been even more amazing. If Trey's behavior that night were anything to go by, he'd felt the same way... which is why Trey's sudden silence is so baffling. This is not how Seth had imagined the aftermath. It's not like he'd expected flowers and candy, but he also hadn't expected Trey to just...disappear, leaving Seth both hurt and confused. It's been killing him wondering what he did wrong, why Trey is avoiding him. All of which explains why he's currently standing before Trey's door nervously ringing the doorbell.
He's just about to turn away and head back home when the door finally opens. A myriad of emotions course through Seth as he stares at Trey, who looks sexy as hell, if not a little ragged. Lust, nervousness, relief and uncertainty consume him, and Seth fidgets slightly under Trey's probing gaze.
"Hey," Seth finds himself saying lamely when Trey fails to speak and he watches as Trey stares back at him, his expression unreadable.
"Seth."
"Hi, uh, can I come in, dude? It's hot out," Seth says taking a step toward the door Trey is partially blocking.
"Actually, I've got some stuff I need to take care of..." Trey says evasively, and disappointment courses through Seth at Trey's words.
"Oh. Yeah, sure," Seth mumbles and is just about to leave when something behind Trey captures his attention.
Stunned, Seth stares at Trey is disbelief before pushing past Trey.
"Seth," Trey says after a beat, but Seth isn't even listening as he takes in the half packed bags and boxes strewn around the room. "Seth, I was going to tell you. I just, I didn't--" Trey begins, but falters when Seth faces him.
The taste of betrayal is bitter on Seth's tongue and he can only stare back at Trey in silence as the ramifications of what he's seeing make themselves known to him. He feels like he's underwater. Everything is hazy and slow and while he's vaguely aware of Trey's lips moving, the words aren't making any sense at all.
And suddenly it hits him as a cacophony of voices fill his head.
Trey is leaving. Everything was a lie. Trey never cared about him. He's leaving. Leaving him. Had it been his intention from the start? Was everything just a joke? A game he'd been playing?
And he wonders in a daze just how long Trey had planned this.
Feeling used and hurt, his eyes and throat burning, Seth can only stare at Trey. "Why?" he finally asks, his voice cracking on the word. And while Seth would have been embarrassed once at showing such weakness in front of Trey, now he can't bring himself to care.
"Seth," Trey says quietly, taking a step toward him, but Seth shakes his head and takes a step back, overwhelmed by panic and betrayal.
"Were you even going to tell me?" Seth asks hoarsely, his vision blurring.
"I was, I just...I wasn't sure how," Trey says quietly, and Seth scoffs at his words.
"Stop lying," Seth shouts, anger now replacing his previous shock. "Just stop lying. Was I -- Was this just a fuckin' game?" Seth continues, uncaring that he sounds like a girl.
"No," Trey says hoarsely, "Seth--" he begins, taking another step toward Seth.
"I hate you! I hate you for doing this to me. I hate you for making me care. I hate you for leaving. God I hate you so much," Seth yells. He can't breathe, it hurts so much, and he just wants to hurt Trey as much as Trey has hurt him.
"Stop," Trey says brokenly, and Seth isn't even aware of how close Trey is until he feels the other boy's arms around his shaking frame. "Seth, just stop."
Struggling against Trey's chest, Seth pushes back, but Trey's grip is unrelenting and finally Seth just collapses in a heap of exhaustion against Trey's chest. Gasping for breathe, Seth clings to the thin fabric of Trey's T-shirt, fisting it in his hands as he rests his head against Trey's shoulder. He isn't aware of the trembling of his body, of the tears that are soaking the worn fabric beneath him. All he is aware of is Trey's body pressed up next to him and the weight of Trey's betrayal.
Seth doesn't know how long they stay in that position before Trey finally pulls back, one hand cupping the back of Seth's neck, tangled in the soft curls, the other ghosting along his jaw.
"Seth, please just let me explain," Trey says, and Seth can't find the energy to pull away and leave. "I was going to tell you," Trey begins and Seth can only stare down at their feet, aware of the weight of Trey's gaze, but unable to look at him. "I--fuck," Trey swears, his hands moving to grip Seth's arms. "Seth, look at me," Trey says finally and it's several moments before Seth can actually look him in the eye.
"Why?" Seth finds himself asking.
"Because it's something I need to do," Trey says and Seth can only stare at him in silence, ignoring the look of sorrow reflected in Trey's eyes. "It's not about wanting to leave you, it's me who needs to leave," Trey continues and Seth frowns at his words, failing to make sense of them.
"I don't get it," Seth says finally, feeling numb and tired.
He watches, exhausted and drained, as Trey begins to pace in agitation before him. "I know, fuck I hate this," Trey mutters under his breath. Seth continues to watch in silence as Trey reaches for a pack of cigarettes and lights one before sitting down heavily on the couch. Wisps of smoke curl around Trey's head as he smokes in silence for several seconds before attempting to speak.
"I can't stay here, Seth," Trey says finally, lifting his head to stare at him. Trey looks as broken and defeated as he feels. Seth swallows heavily before pushing off the wall he's leaning on, and taking a seat on the coffee table across from him.
"Why?" Seth finds himself asking.
"There's a lot of reasons," Trey says finally before looking away.
"Give me one reason," Seth says quietly.
"I don't belong here," Trey says finally, his eyes locking with Seth's once more. Seth is just about to ask him what he means when Trey decides to continue. "I'm the fuck up from Chino, remember?" he continues bitterly and Seth flinches at the hatred in Trey's voice. "You don't think I notice how everyone here looks at me? Like I'm scum?"
"Trey," Seth begins but Trey cuts him off.
"No, Seth. You know I'm right. Hell, people still look at Ryan that way and he's the good Atwood," Trey scoffs before violently snubbing his cigarette out on the astray next to him. "I just, I need to figure stuff out and I can't do that here where I'm being judged all the time."
"What kind of stuff?" Seth asks, his voice barely above a whisper.
"Stuff about me," Trey says after a pause. "I need to figure out what I want to do with my life, Seth. I need to decide if I'm going to go back to school and get my high school diploma or if I'm going to do something else. But I just know I have to do something, because sitting in limbo, wondering how long it'll take before I screw up again is driving me nuts," Trey says finally.
It's the most honest Seth has ever heard him and he softens at Trey's words. Seth always figured that Trey was the type of person who didn't care what others thought of him. Looking at him now, at the defeated slope of his shoulders, his darkened expression, Seth sees just how wrong he was. He feels some of his earlier anger start to ebb away.
"You're not a screw up," Seth says finally, ignoring Trey's snort of disbelief.
"Dude, I was in jail for stealing a car, not to mention all the other shit I've done that I won't even go into," Trey says as he picks at a small hole in his jeans.
"You made a mistake," Seth says simply, and Trey's lips quirk at his words.
Watching Trey, Seth desperately wants to believe him. He wants to believe that he's not the reason Trey is leaving, that it has nothing to do with him and everything to do with Trey wanting to get out of Newport Beach...but he can't quite bring himself to believe it. The timing is just too much of a coincidence.
"Is that the only reason? Or is it because of me too?" Seth finds himself asking, annoyed when his voice comes out slightly shaky and he hopes Trey doesn't pick up on it. "Because, I mean, if you're weirded out by what happened last time, we don't have to do that again. We can just go back to how it was before," Seth says, babbling nervously the longer Trey is silent.
"Seth," Trey interrupts, "It's got nothing to do with that. That was...dude, I can't even describe how great that was," Trey says blushing slightly and Seth can't help grinning. "It's just, I can't stay here."
"Dude, seriously, I get it. Newport sucks. I've been telling my parents that for years. I just don't understand why you were just planning on running out without telling me," Seth says quietly.
"I wasn't. I just didn't know how to tell you exactly. But I was going to come see you tonight, say goodbye," Trey insists before trailing off.
"When are you leaving?" Seth asks, dreading the answer but needing to know.
"Tomorrow morning," Trey says and Seth has to look away as Trey's words sink in.
Tomorrow morning, he has one day left with Trey. One last time together before Trey leaves for good, leaves him behind. Seth feels his chest tighten.
"Does Ryan know?" Seth asks after an uncomfortable lapse in silence, neither boy knowing what to say to the other.
"Yeah, I mentioned it to him the other day," Trey says simply, his expression unreadable, but there's a slight rigidness to his body that doesn't escape Seth.
"Did he not take it well?" Seth finds himself asking, watching as Trey's head jerks up at his words.
"What? No. He...he understands. He thinks it's something I need to do," Trey says, but the words sound hollow to Seth and he frowns a little.
"Dude, I can come with you, maybe," Seth says, his expression hopeful.
"No," Trey says quickly and Seth face falls at his words.
"I thought you said this wasn't about me," Seth says angrily, hurt by Trey's words.
"It's not," Trey says, frustration marring his words.
"Then why can't I come?" Seth asks in confusion.
"Because, Seth! Fuck, you have a life here. What about your parents? What about school and college? What about your friends?" Trey shouts before getting up and pacing around the room. "You can't just leave, Seth. You have ties. It's your senior year, I'm not going to let you fuck it all up. Stop being stupid."
Angry and hurt, Seth can only stare at Trey as the other boy's words keep replaying themselves in his head.
"Stop treating me like a little kid," Seth says finally, having found his voice. "I can make my own decisions. I'm not twelve."
"Then stop acting like you are," Trey says harshly, and Seth flinches at his words.
He can feel tears prickling behind his eyes, but he'll be damned if he'll cry in front of Trey again. Wordlessly, Seth gets up and is halfway to the door when Trey's hand bites into his arm and swings him around. Off-kilter, Seth teeters slightly and is only partially aware of Trey's other hand coming out to steady him. What he is fully aware of however, is Trey's body inches from his own, and the anger and frustration that is radiating off of him.
"Where are you going?" Trey asks hoarsely and Seth looks up at him, seeing the panic on his face.
"Home," Seth says quietly, and he silently watches the look of disbelief and hurt that flashes across Trey's face before being replaced once more by his characteristic look of indifference.
"So that's it? You're just going to go home. No goodbye, nothing?" Trey asks, voice devoid of emotion.
"What do you want from me, Trey?" Seth demands, frustrated by Trey's actions. "You're leaving me, remember? You're getting on a bus or plane tomorrow and you're leaving. I offered to come with you and you called me a baby. What do you want from me?" Seth asks, growing angrier with each passing moment.
"I--Fuck. I want you to understand," Trey says, fingers tightening around Seth's arms.
"Fine, I understand. Happy? You're going away to go find yourself and you don't want me along. Good luck with that," Seth mutters, trying to wrench himself out of Trey's grasp.
"God, why do you have to be such a fuckin' dick," Trey shouts and Seth tenses at his words. "I'm not doing this to try and hurt you. I'm doing this for me and because this is your senior year and you don't need any distractions like me around. I want you to be able to concentrate on school and college and I don't want you fucking up your future because of this thing we have," Trey shouts before falling silent.
Breathing heavily, he releases Seth, and Seth finds himself swaying slightly from the unexpected action. "Dude, I don't need you to protect me," Seth says in disbelief. "I'm not a kid, I can handle school and having a boyfriend," Seth says indignantly.
"Is that why two seconds ago you were so willing to jump on a bus with me and leave your family behind and fuck up your future?" Trey asks and Seth pauses at his words. "Look, Seth. I'm not doing this to try and hurt you. I'm doing this because this is something I need to do. I don't want to leave you, but I'm not going to be a distraction either."
"You're not," Seth insists and Trey shakes his head.
"Seth, stay here. Finish school. You have one year left and then you'll be leaving for college anyway," Trey says quietly.
"I don't want you to leave," Seth says, his voice shaky.
"I know. But I have to go. I just wish I could make you understand," Trey mutters in exasperation.
Seth sighs before speaking. "Dude, I get it, okay. I hate it, but I get it. And if your sole reason for leaving is because you're worried I'll fuck up my college chances then as twisted and sweet as that is, I'm asking you to stay. But, if you're leaving because you need to be thinking about your own future, and you feel you can't do that here, then I hate it but I guess I understand," Seth says slowly.
"I need to go," Trey says quietly, and Seth nods even though it feel like his whole world is coming apart.
"Okay," Seth whispers past the lump in his throat, staring up at Trey before looking away.
"Seth," Trey whispers, the lone word conveying more meaning than Seth had ever thought possible, but before he can react Trey's lips are pressed up against his own.
The kiss is angry and desperate, and Seth finds himself gasping slightly from the unexpected action before kissing Trey back. Tumbling backwards, Seth is vaguely aware of the wall hitting his back, the surface hard and unyielding. Then Trey is pressed up against him, all firm muscles and heat, and Seth moans into Trey's mouth.
Fisting his hands in Trey's hair, Seth parts his lips and sighs in satisfaction as Trey's tongue delves into his mouth. The taste of Trey explodes across his taste buds, as their mouths clash roughly together. Seth closes his eyes as he immerses himself in Trey, knowing that this will be the last time he will be able to do so.
Blindly, Seth allows Trey to manipulate their bodies around boxes and bags only stopping once they reach the bed. Seth sinks into the mattress, as Trey molds his body against him, pressing him down into the bed.
Each moment is desperate and frantic as they claw at each other, hands rough and hurried, pulling off clothes until they're both naked. Breathing ragged, they moan and scratch and bite, marking one another so that in the days to come both will be able to wear the evidence of their joining. The damage will reassure them both that the past few months weren't simply an illusion.
Biting roughly at Trey's bottom lip, Seth releases it with a gasp as Trey's callused palm envelopes his erection. Arching up into the Trey's hand, he throws his head back, neck cording, as Trey licks and kisses and bites his way across his chest. Stopping to briefly tease first one puckered nipple and then the other, continuing along his stomach to dip into his bellybutton before nipping along the inside of his thigh, until finally, finally engulfing Seth into the hot, wet cavern of his mouth.
Broken words and sounds escape from Seth as Trey continues to lick and suck along his length before pulling off of him completely to swirl his tongue around the sensitive head. Seth gasps as Trey uses his tongue to flick along the underside of his cock, before scraping lightly along the heavy vein with his teeth, and then thankfully thankfully taking him once more into his mouth.
And it's good, godohsogood but Seth doesn't want it to end like this. Pushing weakly at Trey's head, he makes a sound of protest and sighs in relief when Trey pulls away.
"Dude, I want you inside me," Seth says and shivers when Trey nods wordlessly and reaches blindly into a duffel by the bed. Seth watches through heavy-lidded eyes as Trey pulls out a bottle of lube and flips open the top, pouring some of the clear fluid onto his hand.
"It might be cold," Trey says, and despite the warning Seth still flinches slightly when Trey's hand makes contact with his skin.
Gasping, he closes his eyes as Trey uses a single finger to breach him, slowly building up momentum before introducing a second digit. Feeling himself stretch around Trey's fingers, Seth grinds down onto Trey's hand and nearly arches off the bed with a cry when Trey crooks his fingers just right and bumps against his prostate.
"Good?" Trey asks shakily and Seth can only nod as he twists his hands into the sheets. "One more," Trey says and then a third finger is inserted and fuck it hurts and Seth gasps at the intrusion but then Trey twists his fingers just so and suddenly the burning starts to recede, replaced by pleasure and it's good all over again. "Seth, is this okay? Do you need more--" Trey says and stops when he sees Seth shake his head.
Eyes opening, Seth stares up in awe and wonder at Trey. Trey who looks so desperate and needy and Seth feels his cock jerk just looking at the other boy.
"I need to be inside you now," Trey growls and Seth can only nod because it's exactly what he needs as well.
Seth hisses as Trey gently withdraws his fingers and then watches in silence as Trey reaches for a condom, rolling it on with expertise, before slathering it with lube. Tensing when he feels Trey's erection nudge against his flesh, Seth digs his fingers into Trey's arms braced on either side of him. He's wanted this for so long but now that it's here Seth can't help feeling afraid as he fixes his gaze onto Trey's face.
"Shhh, it'll be good. I swear," Trey says, pupils blown wide and voice husky with need and Seth can only nod as he tries to relax.
And fuck it hurts as Trey breaches his opening and slides slowly into him, pausing every few inches to allow Seth to adjust to the feel of him. The sensation of toofullfuckstopwait is soon replaced by pleasure, however, as Seth feels himself re-adjust to Trey's girth. He feels full, to the point of bursting as Trey's dick stretches him, and then Trey starts to move. Each thrust is tentative and unsure, when suddenly the burning sensation of Trey sliding inside of him is accompanied by a burst of pleasure, as Trey tilts his hips and moves just so, bumping against his prostate and causing Seth to cry out in pleasure.
It still hurts, although it's more pleasure than pain now, and Seth knows he'll be sore in the morning, but he doesn't care enough to stop. He wants this, wants to feel Trey inside of him days after he's gone, a physical reminder of what he once had, and he wraps his legs around Trey's legs and pulls him against him just so on the next thrust, slamming himself onto Trey's cock.
They continue to move in tandem, frantically thrusting and kissing and biting, a flurry of arms and legs, want and need. Trey wraps his hand around Seth's length, flicking his wrist around the head just so, and Seth comes, exploding across their stomachs as a hoarse cry escapes his lips. Seconds later Seth feels Trey follow him, Trey's body losing its rhythm, thrusting erratically one last time before finally stilling on top of him.
Seth can barely make out anything but the blood pounding in his ears and his heart pounding in his chest as Trey's weight anchors him into the mattress. Taking several deep lung fulls of air, Seth slides his hand into the sweat dampened hair at the base of Trey's neck as Trey shudders against him. Seth winces and hisses when Trey slowly withdraws from him, ghosting a kiss along his temple before removing the condom and rolling onto his back next to him.
Seth knows they should talk, but he's tired and spent and Trey must be as well because he kinda curls up against his side and closes his eyes. And while a part of Seth wants to tease Trey about being a cuddler, he's too exhausted to do anything but wrap his arm around Trey's shoulder, and follow him into sleep.
***
It's much later in the evening when Seth finally awakes. The room is dark and somber and Seth wiggles a little out of Trey's arms, craning his neck to glance at his watch before sitting up in bed. It's a little after 9:00 PM. They've been asleep for over three hours, and Seth is annoyed that they wasted so much of the little time they have left asleep, even if it was with each other.
Trey must sense a shift in the room, because he stirs next to Seth, mumbling softly under his breath before opening his eyes. Watching Trey, Seth takes in his bleary eyes and his mussed hair and smiles a little.
"What time is it?" Trey asks, his voice groggy and hoarse from sleep.
"After nine," Seth says, and allows Trey to pull him back down onto the mattress. He even manages to laugh a little when Trey burrows into his side, hooks a leg across one of Seth's own, and nudges his nose into the crook of his neck. "What time is your bus?" Seth asks slowly, fingers tangling in Trey's short hair, and he can feel Trey tense against him.
"Fuck," Trey whispers close to his ear and Seth nudges him gently with his shoulder when he fails to respond.
"Nine o'clock," Trey says finally, arms tightening around Seth. "I almost forgot," Trey continues quietly and Seth bites his lower lip to refrain from once again asking to accompany him, knowing that his answer will be the same, and not wanting to spend the remainder of their time together fighting.
Rising up onto his elbows, Trey slides over his body until he's once more tangled with Seth, pressing him down into the sheets. "Seth, I need to be inside you again. Please," Trey whispers and Seth can only stare up at him and nod.
Craning his neck, Seth kisses Trey before parting his lips and allowing Trey to plunder him with his tongue. Seth can taste traces of himself mingled with the taste that's uniquely Trey and he moans as he fists his hands into Trey's hair and presses him down on top of him.
Seth can feel Trey's erection sliding against his own and he shudders beneath him. He's still sore from before, but he needs this just as badly as Trey does. Seth allows Trey to roll them onto their sides, but flinches when Trey probes him gently with his finger.
"Bad?" Trey asks, clearly concerned, as he pulls back slightly.
Seth knows he's got to be swollen and he feels hot and tender but he shakes his head at Trey, uncaring of the pain, only wanting to feel Trey deep inside of him once again.
"You'll tell me if it hurts too much?" Trey asks as he reaches for the lube and dribbles some onto his hand.
"Yeah, it's fine. Just don't stop," Seth says, as he reaches for Trey's hand and brings it to where he needs it most.
Biting his lip, Seth tenses at the first touch, but he's still loose and open from the first time and it doesn't hurt nearly as much as he thought it would when Trey adds a second and then finally a third finger. Seth moves in tandem with Trey, fucking himself on Trey's hand, and rubbing himself alternately along Trey's chest, and he feels his breathe leave him when Trey finally withdraws his fingers to reach into his duffel bag for what Seth assumes is the condoms.
Seth stares through glazed eyes as Trey rolls the latex on and liberally coats himself in the lube from base to tip. Boneless, Seth allows Trey to roll him onto his stomach and pull him up on all fours. Seth can feel Trey as he aligns himself behind him. He braces himself when Trey slowly starts to sink into him with a warm, welcoming stretch and burn that makes Seth groan and tighten around Trey, enjoying the muttered curses that escape from Trey's mouth.
While the first time had been desperate and hurried, now it's slow and languid, each movement drawn out.
Each thrust is slow and deep and steady and Seth groans as he pushes back against Trey, taking him deeper inside of him. Tightening around him, he feels Trey jerk and swear softly under his breath, before digging his fingers into the sensitive skin of Seth's hips and quickening his pace.
Harsh breathing, rustling sheets, and the sound of sweat-slick skin slapping together are the only sounds in the other-wise empty apartment.
Biting his lip, Seth bites back a shout when Trey twists his hips just so and the head of his cock brushes against that spot again deep inside him.
"Fuck, there," Seth grinds out through clenched teeth and shivers, his cock painting wet stripes across his stomach, when Trey repeats his earlier action.
And now Trey is hitting that same spot on every thrust, and Seth thinks he might literally die from the pleasure when Trey snakes an arm around Seth's waist to palm his erection. Trey's hand is still slick from the lube and it easily glides along his length. Fingers tease the head, before drifting downward to palm his balls and squeeze and suddenly Seth is coming, exploding in Trey's hand and on the sheets, his vision whiting out for several seconds from the intensity of his orgasm.
Vision clearing, Seth jerks, his cock incredibly sensitive as Trey continues to stoke him though his orgasm, smearing his come into his skin before releasing him and bringing his hand back to Seth's hip. One, two, three more thrusts and then Trey too is coming, Seth's name leaving his lips in a shout as he shudders against Seth's back.
Collapsing onto Seth, they sink into the mattress and Seth has to turn his head onto his side to be able to breathe. Seth can feel Trey's heart pounding against his back, Seth's own breathing just as erratic, and he squirms slightly before Trey finds the energy to roll off of him and onto his side.
"Sorry," Trey mutters, breathe ragged, and Seth can only shake his head, too tired to form actual words.
The bed is sticky and damp beneath Seth and he makes a face before rolling onto his side and draping himself along Trey's length, ignoring the other boy's snort of laughter.
But Trey doesn't push him away, only digs his fingers into Seth's hair and draws him closer.
It's later now, the room darker, and Trey's breathing is starting to even out, even though Seth doesn't think he could possibly sleep anytime soon.
Shifting, he shivers slightly in the cooling room and Trey murmurs and tightens his hold.
"It's cold," Seth whispers, reaching behind him for the covers and Trey opens his eyes, helping Seth to grab the sheets and pull it over them.
"Can you stay the night?" Trey asks, voice tinged with sleep when Seth finally settles back down.
"Yeah, my parents drove down today to see my Nana. They'll be back in a week...maybe later. It's another reason why I came to see you. I wanted to let you know," Seth says before trailing off.
Seth can hear Trey sigh at his words and he wraps himself tighter around him.
"You'll be fine," Trey says quietly, "You have your parents, and Ryan and stuff..." Trey continues before trailing off.
"It's not the same," Seth says softly and he can feel Trey's fingers tighten in his hair.
"I mean, I love my parents, but they're my parents you know? And Ryan is busy with Marissa all the time," Seth says, the words mumbled against Trey's neck.
"What about that girl I saw you with once? The tiny brunette?" Trey asks, nudging Seth when he fails to respond.
"Summer?" Seth asks uncertainly. "I used to have a crush on her, but it never worked out. I haven't spoken to her in months."
"She was hot. I can understand if you ended up hooking up with her," Trey says slowly, and Seth tenses at his words before drawing away.
"You want me to hook up with Summer?" Seth asks in disbelief as he stares down at Trey.
"No. Maybe. I just want you to be happy, Seth," Trey says in frustration.
"I'm happy with you, dumb ass," Seth says, noting Trey's look of relief.
"Okay. Good then. And no more chick flick moments. We're not girls, dude,"
Trey says finally, grinning briefly. Seth rolls his eyes, but doesn't protest when Trey draws him back down beside him.
Trey's breathe is starting to even out again and Seth nudges him slightly.
"Dude, what?" Trey mumbles as he shifts and tries to get more comfortable.
"Why?" Seth asks quietly and watches as Trey's forehead wrinkles in confusion before his eyes reopen.
"I told you--" he says but Seth cuts him off.
"No, not that. Why me?" Seth whispers.
"Because." Trey says simply, rolling them over so that Trey is now pressed up against Seth, his head resting on Seth's shoulder. "Just because..."
And maybe it's the way Trey says the words, or maybe it's how he tightens his hold around him. Seth's not sure what it is exactly but all he knows is that Trey's words are enough and he smiles before closing his own eyes to follow Trey once more into sleep.
***
The sound of a running shower wakes Seth up sometime in the morning. Digging his face into the pillow beneath him, he stretches and groans before opening his eyes, remembering that something isn't right. Staring blankly around him, it takes Seth a second to remember where he is.
Carefully, his body sore, Seth sits up and notices that the bags and boxes now appear to all be packed up and labeled. He wonders when Trey had the time to do all of this. Throwing aside the covers, Seth gets up, weaving around boxes. Slipping into the bathroom, he closes the door behind him. He can see Trey's blurry outline through the frosted glass panels and he slides them open, letting some steam escape while surprising Trey in the process.
"Hey," Seth says grinning at Trey's slightly startled expression.
"Hey yourself," Trey says, wiping some water out of his eyes. "So uh, I have to leave in a couple of hours. I was wondering if you wanted to drive me to the bus --"
"Yes," Seth says before backing Trey up to rest against the tiled wall, feeling Trey flinch against him from the cold. Regardless, Seth presses himself against Trey's body and leans up slightly to kiss him, willing away his ache from the knowledge that Trey will be gone in a few short hours.
Licking and nipping at Trey's bottom lip, Seth finds himself groaning in frustration when Trey pulls back. "And I was wondering if you wouldn't mind keeping some of my stuff at your place until I get settled. It's not much, this place came furnished. Just some --"
"Fine," Seth says, raking his nails down Trey's side before taking the soap still held loosely in Trey's hand. Rubbing it between his hands to work up a lather, Seth then proceeds to slather his hands along Trey's chest and abdomen.
"Already washed that part," Trey murmurs and Seth glances up at him through hooded eyes.
"Hmm...what about here?" Seth asks before dropping to his knees. The water pounds down onto his back as Seth runs soapy hands along Trey's cock, thick and pulsing with blood.
"Fuck, Seth," Trey says, hands sliding over Seth's head and coming to rest on the back of his neck.
"Trey?" Seth asks hesitantly, hands fumbling slightly, and Trey groans before opening his eyes.
"What?" Trey asks, fingers tangling with Seth's around his cock, helping him maintain his earlier rhythm.
"I want to fuck you again. Like before. Is--Can we do that?" Seth asks, feeling weirdly shy for someone who had a cock up his ass twice last night.
"Yeah, okay," Trey says, his hands reaching to turn off the water, but Seth stops him.
"No, dude. In here," Seth says, rising up to press his lips against the sensitive skin behind Trey's ear, nibbling and biting gently as Trey shudders against him.
"Okay. Yeah," Trey says, turning around to brace himself against the wall. Lathering his hands, Seth runs his fingers along the crease of Trey's ass before circling his entrance. Applying a bit of pressure he sinks his finger in, feeling Trey tighten and clench around him. "Seth, now," Trey says impatiently, his voice hoarse, and Seth hesitates, moving his fingers in and out a couple more times before withdrawing.
Silently, he lathers his dick with the remaining soap on his hands before lining up his cock. Slowly Seth pushes through the tight ring of muscle, only vaguely aware of Trey's hand slapping wetly against the tile to steady himself as he swears and opens his legs further.
Still thrusting into Trey, both boys groaning at the sensation, Seth let's his hands continue their frantic exploration along Trey's body, searching out every dip and curve, trying to memorize as much of Trey as he can.
Biting hard at the sensitive skin of Trey's neck, Seth grunts as he comes, spilling deep inside of Trey, the moment over much too soon. He lets Trey continue to thrust back against him, hands fumbling around to Trey's cock to tease and pull at the velvety hardness before Trey finally jerks and explodes against his hand and the shower wall.
Shaking, Seth finally pulls back and watches as their combined fluids swirl down the drain before fixing his eyes onto Trey's pupil-blown ones. Without a word, Seth reaches for the shower knob and turns off the rapidly cooling water. Reaching for a towel he wraps one around his waist and hands the second one to Trey.
Shivering slightly from the cold, Seth quietly dresses and watches as Trey does the same, neither sure of what to say to the other. Seth's watch indicates it's after 7:30 AM, and he feels his stomach sink as Trey looks down at his own watch.
"I should probably start packing up the car," Trey says after a heavy pause and Seth nods before reaching for the lightest box he can find. Wordless, they pack up the car, and Trey places the two bags he's bringing with him in the back seat.
The ride to the bus station is short and Seth stops off at a drive in and orders them some breakfast before finally pulling into the Greyhound station.
They eat in silence and Seth watches Trey's bus slowly start to load up with people through the review mirror. "So Seattle?" Seth asks quietly.
"For now anyway. It seemed like as good a place as any," Trey says, keeping his voice light, and Seth smiles sadly even though his insides feel like they're dying.
"I should probably go, try to get a good seat," Trey says and Seth nods, staring down at his fingers clenched tightly around the steering wheel, knuckles bone white. "Hey," Trey says and Seth glances up at him. "Thank you, for everything. And thank your parents, too," Trey says, eyes too-bright and Seth nods, not trusting himself to speak. "I'll send you a postcard or something when I've settled," Trey continues lamely and Seth nods.
"Wait," Seth says, digging into his pocket and pulling out a small wad of bills. "It's all I have," he says thrusting them into Trey's hands.
"Dude, no," Trey says, trying to give the money back.
"Just take it, okay?" Seth says, and maybe it's something in his voice or the expression on his face but Trey nods, muttering a thanks before slipping the small bundle into his pocket.
This is harder than he'd imagined and Seth can feel his throat tighten as he stares at Trey.
"Thank you," Trey whispers after a beat before cupping the back of Seth's neck and kissing him.
Seth hopes he can convey everything Trey means to him that one kiss.
They break apart, and Seth watches as Trey reaches behind him for his two duffel bags.
"Take care of yourself, geek," Trey says, hitting Seth lightly on his shoulder with one of the bags, and Seth smiles briefly.
And then Trey is gone, with a slam of the door, and no backward glance.
Seth waits and watches as the bus pulls out of the station, until all that's left is a plume of smoke and dust, the bus nothing more than a tiny speck in the review mirror.
***
Epilogue
In the time Trey has been away, a lot has happened in Seth's life. Looking back at who he was when Trey left, and looking at himself now almost eight months later, there's a significant change in Seth's demeanor, one that even his parents and Ryan have remarked upon on more than one occasion.
There's a quiet confidence to Seth now, something that hadn't been there in the years preceding Trey's arrival. The uncertainty, awkwardness and self-doubt that had always clung to him throughout his 17 years has finally receded. And while his relationship with Trey may have been what had initially triggered this change in him, it's the time after Trey left that really helped to shape and mold him into who he is today.
It was difficult at first, trying to readjust to the routine of school and family. But with Trey gone, Seth had needed a distraction, and chose to pour himself into his school work. He even joined some new clubs, helping to improve not only his GPA but his social life as well. Seth would be lying if he said he was always welcomed with open arms by his peers, but he learned how to quietly stand up for himself and ignore other's small-mindedness. And he even managed to make a few friends in the process.
Ironically, Trey left to find himself, and Seth ended up finding himself as well.
As for Trey, it took him a little longer to find his path. He moved around quite a bit at first, taking odd jobs here and there, even working in a casino in Vegas for while as a blackjack dealer. Seth received a whole wad of postcards from Trey under his bed from different cities all over the U.S. before Trey finally settled down a couple of months ago in Rhode Island where he's now working days at an auto garage, and taking night classes to get his GED.
College acceptance letters have been steadily making their way into the Cohen household in the past several weeks. Ryan has been accepted into Berkeley, joining in Sandy's footsteps. And while Seth knows that his dad would love nothing more than for him to attend Berkeley University as well, Seth has been quietly weighting his options.
There's a number of colleges that Seth has been accepted to, including Brown, which isn't far from where Trey is living now, and is a school that Seth has wanted to attend for as long as he can remember. And he knows now he's ready to handle a relationship and school, without sacrificing one or the other, or himself in the process.
So when his dad comes into his room later that evening, asking him whether he's made up his mind yet as to which school he wants to attend, Seth tells him without hesitation Brown.
And if Sandy notices that Brown is located in the same destination as the postcard on his desk, he doesn't ask, and Seth doesn't mention it.
End
Author: Jewel21
Rating : NC-17
Show : The O.C.
Genre: Angst and slash
Pairing: Seth/Trey
Type: Complete.
Disclaimer: I don't own The OC. It belongs to a bunch of people I don't know and Fox.
Summary: Seth finds out... angst ensues.
Author's Notes: This is the final part of my Trey/Seth series. To everyone who has read and commented, thanks so much! Special thanks also goes out to my beta, Flidais. You're the greatest hon! And to Scarlet who answered all my questions and addressed all my concerns. And to Zaloom and Lynn for liking this story and asking me when I'm going to update on a regular basis.
The Commencement by jewel21
It's been three days since Seth last saw Trey. Three days since they'd had mind-blowing sex on Ryan's bed. Three days of replaying that night over and over in his mind, hoping Trey would come by and help ease the the ache. Three days in which he'd had to resolve the problem himself, much to his dismay. School is starting in a couple of weeks, and Seth knows he'll be busy with school work and college applications, and their chances of being together will be practically non-existent. And, Seth has no idea how he's going to shift his focus onto school and college when all he wants to do is immerse himself in Trey 24/7. Of course, he needs Trey to quit the disappearing act in order to do that.
Seth finds himself sighing as he thinks about Trey for the hundredth time that day, thoughts of school and college promptly forgotten. The other night had been fantastic. Sure, he hadn't gotten Trey's dick anywhere near his ass, but what had happened had been even more amazing. If Trey's behavior that night were anything to go by, he'd felt the same way... which is why Trey's sudden silence is so baffling. This is not how Seth had imagined the aftermath. It's not like he'd expected flowers and candy, but he also hadn't expected Trey to just...disappear, leaving Seth both hurt and confused. It's been killing him wondering what he did wrong, why Trey is avoiding him. All of which explains why he's currently standing before Trey's door nervously ringing the doorbell.
He's just about to turn away and head back home when the door finally opens. A myriad of emotions course through Seth as he stares at Trey, who looks sexy as hell, if not a little ragged. Lust, nervousness, relief and uncertainty consume him, and Seth fidgets slightly under Trey's probing gaze.
"Hey," Seth finds himself saying lamely when Trey fails to speak and he watches as Trey stares back at him, his expression unreadable.
"Seth."
"Hi, uh, can I come in, dude? It's hot out," Seth says taking a step toward the door Trey is partially blocking.
"Actually, I've got some stuff I need to take care of..." Trey says evasively, and disappointment courses through Seth at Trey's words.
"Oh. Yeah, sure," Seth mumbles and is just about to leave when something behind Trey captures his attention.
Stunned, Seth stares at Trey is disbelief before pushing past Trey.
"Seth," Trey says after a beat, but Seth isn't even listening as he takes in the half packed bags and boxes strewn around the room. "Seth, I was going to tell you. I just, I didn't--" Trey begins, but falters when Seth faces him.
The taste of betrayal is bitter on Seth's tongue and he can only stare back at Trey in silence as the ramifications of what he's seeing make themselves known to him. He feels like he's underwater. Everything is hazy and slow and while he's vaguely aware of Trey's lips moving, the words aren't making any sense at all.
And suddenly it hits him as a cacophony of voices fill his head.
Trey is leaving. Everything was a lie. Trey never cared about him. He's leaving. Leaving him. Had it been his intention from the start? Was everything just a joke? A game he'd been playing?
And he wonders in a daze just how long Trey had planned this.
Feeling used and hurt, his eyes and throat burning, Seth can only stare at Trey. "Why?" he finally asks, his voice cracking on the word. And while Seth would have been embarrassed once at showing such weakness in front of Trey, now he can't bring himself to care.
"Seth," Trey says quietly, taking a step toward him, but Seth shakes his head and takes a step back, overwhelmed by panic and betrayal.
"Were you even going to tell me?" Seth asks hoarsely, his vision blurring.
"I was, I just...I wasn't sure how," Trey says quietly, and Seth scoffs at his words.
"Stop lying," Seth shouts, anger now replacing his previous shock. "Just stop lying. Was I -- Was this just a fuckin' game?" Seth continues, uncaring that he sounds like a girl.
"No," Trey says hoarsely, "Seth--" he begins, taking another step toward Seth.
"I hate you! I hate you for doing this to me. I hate you for making me care. I hate you for leaving. God I hate you so much," Seth yells. He can't breathe, it hurts so much, and he just wants to hurt Trey as much as Trey has hurt him.
"Stop," Trey says brokenly, and Seth isn't even aware of how close Trey is until he feels the other boy's arms around his shaking frame. "Seth, just stop."
Struggling against Trey's chest, Seth pushes back, but Trey's grip is unrelenting and finally Seth just collapses in a heap of exhaustion against Trey's chest. Gasping for breathe, Seth clings to the thin fabric of Trey's T-shirt, fisting it in his hands as he rests his head against Trey's shoulder. He isn't aware of the trembling of his body, of the tears that are soaking the worn fabric beneath him. All he is aware of is Trey's body pressed up next to him and the weight of Trey's betrayal.
Seth doesn't know how long they stay in that position before Trey finally pulls back, one hand cupping the back of Seth's neck, tangled in the soft curls, the other ghosting along his jaw.
"Seth, please just let me explain," Trey says, and Seth can't find the energy to pull away and leave. "I was going to tell you," Trey begins and Seth can only stare down at their feet, aware of the weight of Trey's gaze, but unable to look at him. "I--fuck," Trey swears, his hands moving to grip Seth's arms. "Seth, look at me," Trey says finally and it's several moments before Seth can actually look him in the eye.
"Why?" Seth finds himself asking.
"Because it's something I need to do," Trey says and Seth can only stare at him in silence, ignoring the look of sorrow reflected in Trey's eyes. "It's not about wanting to leave you, it's me who needs to leave," Trey continues and Seth frowns at his words, failing to make sense of them.
"I don't get it," Seth says finally, feeling numb and tired.
He watches, exhausted and drained, as Trey begins to pace in agitation before him. "I know, fuck I hate this," Trey mutters under his breath. Seth continues to watch in silence as Trey reaches for a pack of cigarettes and lights one before sitting down heavily on the couch. Wisps of smoke curl around Trey's head as he smokes in silence for several seconds before attempting to speak.
"I can't stay here, Seth," Trey says finally, lifting his head to stare at him. Trey looks as broken and defeated as he feels. Seth swallows heavily before pushing off the wall he's leaning on, and taking a seat on the coffee table across from him.
"Why?" Seth finds himself asking.
"There's a lot of reasons," Trey says finally before looking away.
"Give me one reason," Seth says quietly.
"I don't belong here," Trey says finally, his eyes locking with Seth's once more. Seth is just about to ask him what he means when Trey decides to continue. "I'm the fuck up from Chino, remember?" he continues bitterly and Seth flinches at the hatred in Trey's voice. "You don't think I notice how everyone here looks at me? Like I'm scum?"
"Trey," Seth begins but Trey cuts him off.
"No, Seth. You know I'm right. Hell, people still look at Ryan that way and he's the good Atwood," Trey scoffs before violently snubbing his cigarette out on the astray next to him. "I just, I need to figure stuff out and I can't do that here where I'm being judged all the time."
"What kind of stuff?" Seth asks, his voice barely above a whisper.
"Stuff about me," Trey says after a pause. "I need to figure out what I want to do with my life, Seth. I need to decide if I'm going to go back to school and get my high school diploma or if I'm going to do something else. But I just know I have to do something, because sitting in limbo, wondering how long it'll take before I screw up again is driving me nuts," Trey says finally.
It's the most honest Seth has ever heard him and he softens at Trey's words. Seth always figured that Trey was the type of person who didn't care what others thought of him. Looking at him now, at the defeated slope of his shoulders, his darkened expression, Seth sees just how wrong he was. He feels some of his earlier anger start to ebb away.
"You're not a screw up," Seth says finally, ignoring Trey's snort of disbelief.
"Dude, I was in jail for stealing a car, not to mention all the other shit I've done that I won't even go into," Trey says as he picks at a small hole in his jeans.
"You made a mistake," Seth says simply, and Trey's lips quirk at his words.
Watching Trey, Seth desperately wants to believe him. He wants to believe that he's not the reason Trey is leaving, that it has nothing to do with him and everything to do with Trey wanting to get out of Newport Beach...but he can't quite bring himself to believe it. The timing is just too much of a coincidence.
"Is that the only reason? Or is it because of me too?" Seth finds himself asking, annoyed when his voice comes out slightly shaky and he hopes Trey doesn't pick up on it. "Because, I mean, if you're weirded out by what happened last time, we don't have to do that again. We can just go back to how it was before," Seth says, babbling nervously the longer Trey is silent.
"Seth," Trey interrupts, "It's got nothing to do with that. That was...dude, I can't even describe how great that was," Trey says blushing slightly and Seth can't help grinning. "It's just, I can't stay here."
"Dude, seriously, I get it. Newport sucks. I've been telling my parents that for years. I just don't understand why you were just planning on running out without telling me," Seth says quietly.
"I wasn't. I just didn't know how to tell you exactly. But I was going to come see you tonight, say goodbye," Trey insists before trailing off.
"When are you leaving?" Seth asks, dreading the answer but needing to know.
"Tomorrow morning," Trey says and Seth has to look away as Trey's words sink in.
Tomorrow morning, he has one day left with Trey. One last time together before Trey leaves for good, leaves him behind. Seth feels his chest tighten.
"Does Ryan know?" Seth asks after an uncomfortable lapse in silence, neither boy knowing what to say to the other.
"Yeah, I mentioned it to him the other day," Trey says simply, his expression unreadable, but there's a slight rigidness to his body that doesn't escape Seth.
"Did he not take it well?" Seth finds himself asking, watching as Trey's head jerks up at his words.
"What? No. He...he understands. He thinks it's something I need to do," Trey says, but the words sound hollow to Seth and he frowns a little.
"Dude, I can come with you, maybe," Seth says, his expression hopeful.
"No," Trey says quickly and Seth face falls at his words.
"I thought you said this wasn't about me," Seth says angrily, hurt by Trey's words.
"It's not," Trey says, frustration marring his words.
"Then why can't I come?" Seth asks in confusion.
"Because, Seth! Fuck, you have a life here. What about your parents? What about school and college? What about your friends?" Trey shouts before getting up and pacing around the room. "You can't just leave, Seth. You have ties. It's your senior year, I'm not going to let you fuck it all up. Stop being stupid."
Angry and hurt, Seth can only stare at Trey as the other boy's words keep replaying themselves in his head.
"Stop treating me like a little kid," Seth says finally, having found his voice. "I can make my own decisions. I'm not twelve."
"Then stop acting like you are," Trey says harshly, and Seth flinches at his words.
He can feel tears prickling behind his eyes, but he'll be damned if he'll cry in front of Trey again. Wordlessly, Seth gets up and is halfway to the door when Trey's hand bites into his arm and swings him around. Off-kilter, Seth teeters slightly and is only partially aware of Trey's other hand coming out to steady him. What he is fully aware of however, is Trey's body inches from his own, and the anger and frustration that is radiating off of him.
"Where are you going?" Trey asks hoarsely and Seth looks up at him, seeing the panic on his face.
"Home," Seth says quietly, and he silently watches the look of disbelief and hurt that flashes across Trey's face before being replaced once more by his characteristic look of indifference.
"So that's it? You're just going to go home. No goodbye, nothing?" Trey asks, voice devoid of emotion.
"What do you want from me, Trey?" Seth demands, frustrated by Trey's actions. "You're leaving me, remember? You're getting on a bus or plane tomorrow and you're leaving. I offered to come with you and you called me a baby. What do you want from me?" Seth asks, growing angrier with each passing moment.
"I--Fuck. I want you to understand," Trey says, fingers tightening around Seth's arms.
"Fine, I understand. Happy? You're going away to go find yourself and you don't want me along. Good luck with that," Seth mutters, trying to wrench himself out of Trey's grasp.
"God, why do you have to be such a fuckin' dick," Trey shouts and Seth tenses at his words. "I'm not doing this to try and hurt you. I'm doing this for me and because this is your senior year and you don't need any distractions like me around. I want you to be able to concentrate on school and college and I don't want you fucking up your future because of this thing we have," Trey shouts before falling silent.
Breathing heavily, he releases Seth, and Seth finds himself swaying slightly from the unexpected action. "Dude, I don't need you to protect me," Seth says in disbelief. "I'm not a kid, I can handle school and having a boyfriend," Seth says indignantly.
"Is that why two seconds ago you were so willing to jump on a bus with me and leave your family behind and fuck up your future?" Trey asks and Seth pauses at his words. "Look, Seth. I'm not doing this to try and hurt you. I'm doing this because this is something I need to do. I don't want to leave you, but I'm not going to be a distraction either."
"You're not," Seth insists and Trey shakes his head.
"Seth, stay here. Finish school. You have one year left and then you'll be leaving for college anyway," Trey says quietly.
"I don't want you to leave," Seth says, his voice shaky.
"I know. But I have to go. I just wish I could make you understand," Trey mutters in exasperation.
Seth sighs before speaking. "Dude, I get it, okay. I hate it, but I get it. And if your sole reason for leaving is because you're worried I'll fuck up my college chances then as twisted and sweet as that is, I'm asking you to stay. But, if you're leaving because you need to be thinking about your own future, and you feel you can't do that here, then I hate it but I guess I understand," Seth says slowly.
"I need to go," Trey says quietly, and Seth nods even though it feel like his whole world is coming apart.
"Okay," Seth whispers past the lump in his throat, staring up at Trey before looking away.
"Seth," Trey whispers, the lone word conveying more meaning than Seth had ever thought possible, but before he can react Trey's lips are pressed up against his own.
The kiss is angry and desperate, and Seth finds himself gasping slightly from the unexpected action before kissing Trey back. Tumbling backwards, Seth is vaguely aware of the wall hitting his back, the surface hard and unyielding. Then Trey is pressed up against him, all firm muscles and heat, and Seth moans into Trey's mouth.
Fisting his hands in Trey's hair, Seth parts his lips and sighs in satisfaction as Trey's tongue delves into his mouth. The taste of Trey explodes across his taste buds, as their mouths clash roughly together. Seth closes his eyes as he immerses himself in Trey, knowing that this will be the last time he will be able to do so.
Blindly, Seth allows Trey to manipulate their bodies around boxes and bags only stopping once they reach the bed. Seth sinks into the mattress, as Trey molds his body against him, pressing him down into the bed.
Each moment is desperate and frantic as they claw at each other, hands rough and hurried, pulling off clothes until they're both naked. Breathing ragged, they moan and scratch and bite, marking one another so that in the days to come both will be able to wear the evidence of their joining. The damage will reassure them both that the past few months weren't simply an illusion.
Biting roughly at Trey's bottom lip, Seth releases it with a gasp as Trey's callused palm envelopes his erection. Arching up into the Trey's hand, he throws his head back, neck cording, as Trey licks and kisses and bites his way across his chest. Stopping to briefly tease first one puckered nipple and then the other, continuing along his stomach to dip into his bellybutton before nipping along the inside of his thigh, until finally, finally engulfing Seth into the hot, wet cavern of his mouth.
Broken words and sounds escape from Seth as Trey continues to lick and suck along his length before pulling off of him completely to swirl his tongue around the sensitive head. Seth gasps as Trey uses his tongue to flick along the underside of his cock, before scraping lightly along the heavy vein with his teeth, and then thankfully thankfully taking him once more into his mouth.
And it's good, godohsogood but Seth doesn't want it to end like this. Pushing weakly at Trey's head, he makes a sound of protest and sighs in relief when Trey pulls away.
"Dude, I want you inside me," Seth says and shivers when Trey nods wordlessly and reaches blindly into a duffel by the bed. Seth watches through heavy-lidded eyes as Trey pulls out a bottle of lube and flips open the top, pouring some of the clear fluid onto his hand.
"It might be cold," Trey says, and despite the warning Seth still flinches slightly when Trey's hand makes contact with his skin.
Gasping, he closes his eyes as Trey uses a single finger to breach him, slowly building up momentum before introducing a second digit. Feeling himself stretch around Trey's fingers, Seth grinds down onto Trey's hand and nearly arches off the bed with a cry when Trey crooks his fingers just right and bumps against his prostate.
"Good?" Trey asks shakily and Seth can only nod as he twists his hands into the sheets. "One more," Trey says and then a third finger is inserted and fuck it hurts and Seth gasps at the intrusion but then Trey twists his fingers just so and suddenly the burning starts to recede, replaced by pleasure and it's good all over again. "Seth, is this okay? Do you need more--" Trey says and stops when he sees Seth shake his head.
Eyes opening, Seth stares up in awe and wonder at Trey. Trey who looks so desperate and needy and Seth feels his cock jerk just looking at the other boy.
"I need to be inside you now," Trey growls and Seth can only nod because it's exactly what he needs as well.
Seth hisses as Trey gently withdraws his fingers and then watches in silence as Trey reaches for a condom, rolling it on with expertise, before slathering it with lube. Tensing when he feels Trey's erection nudge against his flesh, Seth digs his fingers into Trey's arms braced on either side of him. He's wanted this for so long but now that it's here Seth can't help feeling afraid as he fixes his gaze onto Trey's face.
"Shhh, it'll be good. I swear," Trey says, pupils blown wide and voice husky with need and Seth can only nod as he tries to relax.
And fuck it hurts as Trey breaches his opening and slides slowly into him, pausing every few inches to allow Seth to adjust to the feel of him. The sensation of toofullfuckstopwait is soon replaced by pleasure, however, as Seth feels himself re-adjust to Trey's girth. He feels full, to the point of bursting as Trey's dick stretches him, and then Trey starts to move. Each thrust is tentative and unsure, when suddenly the burning sensation of Trey sliding inside of him is accompanied by a burst of pleasure, as Trey tilts his hips and moves just so, bumping against his prostate and causing Seth to cry out in pleasure.
It still hurts, although it's more pleasure than pain now, and Seth knows he'll be sore in the morning, but he doesn't care enough to stop. He wants this, wants to feel Trey inside of him days after he's gone, a physical reminder of what he once had, and he wraps his legs around Trey's legs and pulls him against him just so on the next thrust, slamming himself onto Trey's cock.
They continue to move in tandem, frantically thrusting and kissing and biting, a flurry of arms and legs, want and need. Trey wraps his hand around Seth's length, flicking his wrist around the head just so, and Seth comes, exploding across their stomachs as a hoarse cry escapes his lips. Seconds later Seth feels Trey follow him, Trey's body losing its rhythm, thrusting erratically one last time before finally stilling on top of him.
Seth can barely make out anything but the blood pounding in his ears and his heart pounding in his chest as Trey's weight anchors him into the mattress. Taking several deep lung fulls of air, Seth slides his hand into the sweat dampened hair at the base of Trey's neck as Trey shudders against him. Seth winces and hisses when Trey slowly withdraws from him, ghosting a kiss along his temple before removing the condom and rolling onto his back next to him.
Seth knows they should talk, but he's tired and spent and Trey must be as well because he kinda curls up against his side and closes his eyes. And while a part of Seth wants to tease Trey about being a cuddler, he's too exhausted to do anything but wrap his arm around Trey's shoulder, and follow him into sleep.
***
It's much later in the evening when Seth finally awakes. The room is dark and somber and Seth wiggles a little out of Trey's arms, craning his neck to glance at his watch before sitting up in bed. It's a little after 9:00 PM. They've been asleep for over three hours, and Seth is annoyed that they wasted so much of the little time they have left asleep, even if it was with each other.
Trey must sense a shift in the room, because he stirs next to Seth, mumbling softly under his breath before opening his eyes. Watching Trey, Seth takes in his bleary eyes and his mussed hair and smiles a little.
"What time is it?" Trey asks, his voice groggy and hoarse from sleep.
"After nine," Seth says, and allows Trey to pull him back down onto the mattress. He even manages to laugh a little when Trey burrows into his side, hooks a leg across one of Seth's own, and nudges his nose into the crook of his neck. "What time is your bus?" Seth asks slowly, fingers tangling in Trey's short hair, and he can feel Trey tense against him.
"Fuck," Trey whispers close to his ear and Seth nudges him gently with his shoulder when he fails to respond.
"Nine o'clock," Trey says finally, arms tightening around Seth. "I almost forgot," Trey continues quietly and Seth bites his lower lip to refrain from once again asking to accompany him, knowing that his answer will be the same, and not wanting to spend the remainder of their time together fighting.
Rising up onto his elbows, Trey slides over his body until he's once more tangled with Seth, pressing him down into the sheets. "Seth, I need to be inside you again. Please," Trey whispers and Seth can only stare up at him and nod.
Craning his neck, Seth kisses Trey before parting his lips and allowing Trey to plunder him with his tongue. Seth can taste traces of himself mingled with the taste that's uniquely Trey and he moans as he fists his hands into Trey's hair and presses him down on top of him.
Seth can feel Trey's erection sliding against his own and he shudders beneath him. He's still sore from before, but he needs this just as badly as Trey does. Seth allows Trey to roll them onto their sides, but flinches when Trey probes him gently with his finger.
"Bad?" Trey asks, clearly concerned, as he pulls back slightly.
Seth knows he's got to be swollen and he feels hot and tender but he shakes his head at Trey, uncaring of the pain, only wanting to feel Trey deep inside of him once again.
"You'll tell me if it hurts too much?" Trey asks as he reaches for the lube and dribbles some onto his hand.
"Yeah, it's fine. Just don't stop," Seth says, as he reaches for Trey's hand and brings it to where he needs it most.
Biting his lip, Seth tenses at the first touch, but he's still loose and open from the first time and it doesn't hurt nearly as much as he thought it would when Trey adds a second and then finally a third finger. Seth moves in tandem with Trey, fucking himself on Trey's hand, and rubbing himself alternately along Trey's chest, and he feels his breathe leave him when Trey finally withdraws his fingers to reach into his duffel bag for what Seth assumes is the condoms.
Seth stares through glazed eyes as Trey rolls the latex on and liberally coats himself in the lube from base to tip. Boneless, Seth allows Trey to roll him onto his stomach and pull him up on all fours. Seth can feel Trey as he aligns himself behind him. He braces himself when Trey slowly starts to sink into him with a warm, welcoming stretch and burn that makes Seth groan and tighten around Trey, enjoying the muttered curses that escape from Trey's mouth.
While the first time had been desperate and hurried, now it's slow and languid, each movement drawn out.
Each thrust is slow and deep and steady and Seth groans as he pushes back against Trey, taking him deeper inside of him. Tightening around him, he feels Trey jerk and swear softly under his breath, before digging his fingers into the sensitive skin of Seth's hips and quickening his pace.
Harsh breathing, rustling sheets, and the sound of sweat-slick skin slapping together are the only sounds in the other-wise empty apartment.
Biting his lip, Seth bites back a shout when Trey twists his hips just so and the head of his cock brushes against that spot again deep inside him.
"Fuck, there," Seth grinds out through clenched teeth and shivers, his cock painting wet stripes across his stomach, when Trey repeats his earlier action.
And now Trey is hitting that same spot on every thrust, and Seth thinks he might literally die from the pleasure when Trey snakes an arm around Seth's waist to palm his erection. Trey's hand is still slick from the lube and it easily glides along his length. Fingers tease the head, before drifting downward to palm his balls and squeeze and suddenly Seth is coming, exploding in Trey's hand and on the sheets, his vision whiting out for several seconds from the intensity of his orgasm.
Vision clearing, Seth jerks, his cock incredibly sensitive as Trey continues to stoke him though his orgasm, smearing his come into his skin before releasing him and bringing his hand back to Seth's hip. One, two, three more thrusts and then Trey too is coming, Seth's name leaving his lips in a shout as he shudders against Seth's back.
Collapsing onto Seth, they sink into the mattress and Seth has to turn his head onto his side to be able to breathe. Seth can feel Trey's heart pounding against his back, Seth's own breathing just as erratic, and he squirms slightly before Trey finds the energy to roll off of him and onto his side.
"Sorry," Trey mutters, breathe ragged, and Seth can only shake his head, too tired to form actual words.
The bed is sticky and damp beneath Seth and he makes a face before rolling onto his side and draping himself along Trey's length, ignoring the other boy's snort of laughter.
But Trey doesn't push him away, only digs his fingers into Seth's hair and draws him closer.
It's later now, the room darker, and Trey's breathing is starting to even out, even though Seth doesn't think he could possibly sleep anytime soon.
Shifting, he shivers slightly in the cooling room and Trey murmurs and tightens his hold.
"It's cold," Seth whispers, reaching behind him for the covers and Trey opens his eyes, helping Seth to grab the sheets and pull it over them.
"Can you stay the night?" Trey asks, voice tinged with sleep when Seth finally settles back down.
"Yeah, my parents drove down today to see my Nana. They'll be back in a week...maybe later. It's another reason why I came to see you. I wanted to let you know," Seth says before trailing off.
Seth can hear Trey sigh at his words and he wraps himself tighter around him.
"You'll be fine," Trey says quietly, "You have your parents, and Ryan and stuff..." Trey continues before trailing off.
"It's not the same," Seth says softly and he can feel Trey's fingers tighten in his hair.
"I mean, I love my parents, but they're my parents you know? And Ryan is busy with Marissa all the time," Seth says, the words mumbled against Trey's neck.
"What about that girl I saw you with once? The tiny brunette?" Trey asks, nudging Seth when he fails to respond.
"Summer?" Seth asks uncertainly. "I used to have a crush on her, but it never worked out. I haven't spoken to her in months."
"She was hot. I can understand if you ended up hooking up with her," Trey says slowly, and Seth tenses at his words before drawing away.
"You want me to hook up with Summer?" Seth asks in disbelief as he stares down at Trey.
"No. Maybe. I just want you to be happy, Seth," Trey says in frustration.
"I'm happy with you, dumb ass," Seth says, noting Trey's look of relief.
"Okay. Good then. And no more chick flick moments. We're not girls, dude,"
Trey says finally, grinning briefly. Seth rolls his eyes, but doesn't protest when Trey draws him back down beside him.
Trey's breathe is starting to even out again and Seth nudges him slightly.
"Dude, what?" Trey mumbles as he shifts and tries to get more comfortable.
"Why?" Seth asks quietly and watches as Trey's forehead wrinkles in confusion before his eyes reopen.
"I told you--" he says but Seth cuts him off.
"No, not that. Why me?" Seth whispers.
"Because." Trey says simply, rolling them over so that Trey is now pressed up against Seth, his head resting on Seth's shoulder. "Just because..."
And maybe it's the way Trey says the words, or maybe it's how he tightens his hold around him. Seth's not sure what it is exactly but all he knows is that Trey's words are enough and he smiles before closing his own eyes to follow Trey once more into sleep.
***
The sound of a running shower wakes Seth up sometime in the morning. Digging his face into the pillow beneath him, he stretches and groans before opening his eyes, remembering that something isn't right. Staring blankly around him, it takes Seth a second to remember where he is.
Carefully, his body sore, Seth sits up and notices that the bags and boxes now appear to all be packed up and labeled. He wonders when Trey had the time to do all of this. Throwing aside the covers, Seth gets up, weaving around boxes. Slipping into the bathroom, he closes the door behind him. He can see Trey's blurry outline through the frosted glass panels and he slides them open, letting some steam escape while surprising Trey in the process.
"Hey," Seth says grinning at Trey's slightly startled expression.
"Hey yourself," Trey says, wiping some water out of his eyes. "So uh, I have to leave in a couple of hours. I was wondering if you wanted to drive me to the bus --"
"Yes," Seth says before backing Trey up to rest against the tiled wall, feeling Trey flinch against him from the cold. Regardless, Seth presses himself against Trey's body and leans up slightly to kiss him, willing away his ache from the knowledge that Trey will be gone in a few short hours.
Licking and nipping at Trey's bottom lip, Seth finds himself groaning in frustration when Trey pulls back. "And I was wondering if you wouldn't mind keeping some of my stuff at your place until I get settled. It's not much, this place came furnished. Just some --"
"Fine," Seth says, raking his nails down Trey's side before taking the soap still held loosely in Trey's hand. Rubbing it between his hands to work up a lather, Seth then proceeds to slather his hands along Trey's chest and abdomen.
"Already washed that part," Trey murmurs and Seth glances up at him through hooded eyes.
"Hmm...what about here?" Seth asks before dropping to his knees. The water pounds down onto his back as Seth runs soapy hands along Trey's cock, thick and pulsing with blood.
"Fuck, Seth," Trey says, hands sliding over Seth's head and coming to rest on the back of his neck.
"Trey?" Seth asks hesitantly, hands fumbling slightly, and Trey groans before opening his eyes.
"What?" Trey asks, fingers tangling with Seth's around his cock, helping him maintain his earlier rhythm.
"I want to fuck you again. Like before. Is--Can we do that?" Seth asks, feeling weirdly shy for someone who had a cock up his ass twice last night.
"Yeah, okay," Trey says, his hands reaching to turn off the water, but Seth stops him.
"No, dude. In here," Seth says, rising up to press his lips against the sensitive skin behind Trey's ear, nibbling and biting gently as Trey shudders against him.
"Okay. Yeah," Trey says, turning around to brace himself against the wall. Lathering his hands, Seth runs his fingers along the crease of Trey's ass before circling his entrance. Applying a bit of pressure he sinks his finger in, feeling Trey tighten and clench around him. "Seth, now," Trey says impatiently, his voice hoarse, and Seth hesitates, moving his fingers in and out a couple more times before withdrawing.
Silently, he lathers his dick with the remaining soap on his hands before lining up his cock. Slowly Seth pushes through the tight ring of muscle, only vaguely aware of Trey's hand slapping wetly against the tile to steady himself as he swears and opens his legs further.
Still thrusting into Trey, both boys groaning at the sensation, Seth let's his hands continue their frantic exploration along Trey's body, searching out every dip and curve, trying to memorize as much of Trey as he can.
Biting hard at the sensitive skin of Trey's neck, Seth grunts as he comes, spilling deep inside of Trey, the moment over much too soon. He lets Trey continue to thrust back against him, hands fumbling around to Trey's cock to tease and pull at the velvety hardness before Trey finally jerks and explodes against his hand and the shower wall.
Shaking, Seth finally pulls back and watches as their combined fluids swirl down the drain before fixing his eyes onto Trey's pupil-blown ones. Without a word, Seth reaches for the shower knob and turns off the rapidly cooling water. Reaching for a towel he wraps one around his waist and hands the second one to Trey.
Shivering slightly from the cold, Seth quietly dresses and watches as Trey does the same, neither sure of what to say to the other. Seth's watch indicates it's after 7:30 AM, and he feels his stomach sink as Trey looks down at his own watch.
"I should probably start packing up the car," Trey says after a heavy pause and Seth nods before reaching for the lightest box he can find. Wordless, they pack up the car, and Trey places the two bags he's bringing with him in the back seat.
The ride to the bus station is short and Seth stops off at a drive in and orders them some breakfast before finally pulling into the Greyhound station.
They eat in silence and Seth watches Trey's bus slowly start to load up with people through the review mirror. "So Seattle?" Seth asks quietly.
"For now anyway. It seemed like as good a place as any," Trey says, keeping his voice light, and Seth smiles sadly even though his insides feel like they're dying.
"I should probably go, try to get a good seat," Trey says and Seth nods, staring down at his fingers clenched tightly around the steering wheel, knuckles bone white. "Hey," Trey says and Seth glances up at him. "Thank you, for everything. And thank your parents, too," Trey says, eyes too-bright and Seth nods, not trusting himself to speak. "I'll send you a postcard or something when I've settled," Trey continues lamely and Seth nods.
"Wait," Seth says, digging into his pocket and pulling out a small wad of bills. "It's all I have," he says thrusting them into Trey's hands.
"Dude, no," Trey says, trying to give the money back.
"Just take it, okay?" Seth says, and maybe it's something in his voice or the expression on his face but Trey nods, muttering a thanks before slipping the small bundle into his pocket.
This is harder than he'd imagined and Seth can feel his throat tighten as he stares at Trey.
"Thank you," Trey whispers after a beat before cupping the back of Seth's neck and kissing him.
Seth hopes he can convey everything Trey means to him that one kiss.
They break apart, and Seth watches as Trey reaches behind him for his two duffel bags.
"Take care of yourself, geek," Trey says, hitting Seth lightly on his shoulder with one of the bags, and Seth smiles briefly.
And then Trey is gone, with a slam of the door, and no backward glance.
Seth waits and watches as the bus pulls out of the station, until all that's left is a plume of smoke and dust, the bus nothing more than a tiny speck in the review mirror.
***
Epilogue
In the time Trey has been away, a lot has happened in Seth's life. Looking back at who he was when Trey left, and looking at himself now almost eight months later, there's a significant change in Seth's demeanor, one that even his parents and Ryan have remarked upon on more than one occasion.
There's a quiet confidence to Seth now, something that hadn't been there in the years preceding Trey's arrival. The uncertainty, awkwardness and self-doubt that had always clung to him throughout his 17 years has finally receded. And while his relationship with Trey may have been what had initially triggered this change in him, it's the time after Trey left that really helped to shape and mold him into who he is today.
It was difficult at first, trying to readjust to the routine of school and family. But with Trey gone, Seth had needed a distraction, and chose to pour himself into his school work. He even joined some new clubs, helping to improve not only his GPA but his social life as well. Seth would be lying if he said he was always welcomed with open arms by his peers, but he learned how to quietly stand up for himself and ignore other's small-mindedness. And he even managed to make a few friends in the process.
Ironically, Trey left to find himself, and Seth ended up finding himself as well.
As for Trey, it took him a little longer to find his path. He moved around quite a bit at first, taking odd jobs here and there, even working in a casino in Vegas for while as a blackjack dealer. Seth received a whole wad of postcards from Trey under his bed from different cities all over the U.S. before Trey finally settled down a couple of months ago in Rhode Island where he's now working days at an auto garage, and taking night classes to get his GED.
College acceptance letters have been steadily making their way into the Cohen household in the past several weeks. Ryan has been accepted into Berkeley, joining in Sandy's footsteps. And while Seth knows that his dad would love nothing more than for him to attend Berkeley University as well, Seth has been quietly weighting his options.
There's a number of colleges that Seth has been accepted to, including Brown, which isn't far from where Trey is living now, and is a school that Seth has wanted to attend for as long as he can remember. And he knows now he's ready to handle a relationship and school, without sacrificing one or the other, or himself in the process.
So when his dad comes into his room later that evening, asking him whether he's made up his mind yet as to which school he wants to attend, Seth tells him without hesitation Brown.
And if Sandy notices that Brown is located in the same destination as the postcard on his desk, he doesn't ask, and Seth doesn't mention it.
End