Ficlet - The O.C. - Guilty Conscience - Chapter 4 (Trey/Seth)
Title: Guilty Conscience
Author: Jewel21
Rating: Hard R for sexual situations
Show: The O.C.
Genre: Angst/Slash
Pairing: Seth/Trey
Type: WIP
Summary: An unforeseeable event sends Trey and Seth back to Orange County.
A/N: This story contains slash. If you are offended by such pairings, please don't read. This story also follows after my series ‘Guilty Pleasures.’ I would suggest reading that first to better understand this story. That fic is as follows: Guilty Pleasures, Seth Knows, Stolen Moments, Risky Games, Confrontations and The Commencement
Special thanks goes out to my betas, scarlet and black_london.
Oh, and reviews are very much appreciated. Seriously, they are like crack to me. Please don’t deny me my fix ;)
________________________________________________________________________
Disclaimer: I don't own The OC. It belongs to a bunch of people I don't know and Fox.
Chapter 4
Trey woke up to the sound of Seth’s voice in his ear. Disoriented, he tried to blink the sleep from his eyes, before slowly sitting up. Seth was dressed in a suit, minus the tie and jacket, and it took him a second to remember that today was his mother’s funeral, the knowledge making his stomach sink.
“Hey,” Seth said quietly, avoiding eye contact as he played nervously with the edge of the comforter.
“Hi,” Trey said before lapsing into silence. He made a move to get out of bed but Seth didn’t get up from his spot and Trey leaned back against the headboard instead.
“I didn’t see you last night,” Seth said finally.
“Yeah, I had a headache and went to bed. I woke up around 9:00 PM but I didn’t see you around,” Trey said as he raked a hand through his hair.
“I was with Ryan. He told me about what happened with your dad. I’m sorry he was such a dick,” Seth said.
“Thanks,” Trey said, feeling uncomfortable.
Silenced settled around them and he watched as Seth rose from the bed. Seth looked worried and uncertain and Trey tracked him with his eyes as Seth went to the closet and started to pull out the clothes he would need to wear for the service.
“We need to leave in about forty minutes, so you should eat something and get dressed so we won’t be late,” Seth continued as he went to the dresser and started to pull out boxer shorts and socks.
He’d been together with Seth long enough to recognize when Seth was concerned, nervous, or had something weighing heavily on his mind that he wanted to discuss but didn’t know how to broach the subject. More than once he’d come home from work to find Seth uncharacteristically cleaning, folding laundry, or puttering around the apartment and only after he would grab Seth by the shoulders and sit him down and ask him what was wrong would Seth finally tell him what was bothering him.
Rising from the bed, Trey came to a stop next to Seth and wrapped his hand around Seth’s wrist, stilling his movements.
“Seth--” he started to say but was interrupted by a knock on the door. Sandy’s head poking through the door made him release Seth’s wrist and he grabbed the socks and boxers than Seth was still holding in his hand.
“Good, you’re awake. We’re going to be leaving soon,” Sandy said before turning his attention on his son. “And you, your mother is looking for you,” Sandy continued and Seth nodded before walking out the door.
“So how are you doing with everything?” Sandy asked once Seth had left.
“Fine, sir,” Trey said automatically.
“It’s going to be a long day, and it’s going to probably take you awhile to process everything that’s happened. But, if you need to talk Kirsten and I would be more than happy to listen,” Sandy said.
It felt weird talking with Sandy. And not just because he was doing his son. He’d always had issues with parental units, never truly felt comfortable around them. Not his parents and certainly not his friends’ parents. It felt even weirder being around Kirsten and Sandy. They were like the perfect happy couples you saw on TV that Trey had always suspected didn’t truly exist. Until he met the Cohens anyway.
Being around Kirsten and Sandy just reminded him of how different they were from his own family and he couldn’t help feeling inferior around them, even though he knew that was never their intention.
“I appreciate that,” he said, trying hard not to fidget. “Thank you,” he added as an afterthought.
“You’re welcome,” Sandy said. He stared at him for a few seconds, as though he wanted to say something more, but then he turned to leave. “We’ll be downstairs when you’re ready.”
Only after Sandy shut the door did Trey finally move from his spot.
***
The service was small and intimate. The funeral was held in a small church with stained glass windows. There were a few flower wreaths by the coffin, one from the Cohens, one from him and Ryan and surprisingly enough one from their father. Both he and Ryan had paused when they’d noticed their father’s name on the banner draped around the floral arrangement, along with his and Ryan’s names. It had annoyed him that his father would not only have the nerve to send flowers after their visit with him, but that he would also have the nerve to include both his sons’ names. He wanted the flowers removed, but then he remembered the look of grief and shock on his father’s face when he’d told him the news, before he had started ranting and trying to lay blame. Conflicted, he stared silently at the wreath as feelings of guilt and anger warred inside of him before eventually tearing his eyes away.
The smell of the flowers in the small room made him nauseous and he felt the beginning of another headache tapping at the base of his skull whenever he even looked at his mother’s coffin. He’d been expecting no one to show up at the funeral and was surprised that in addition to the Cohens, Teresa had shown up along with her family. As well as an old neighbor of theirs back in Chino they hadn’t seen in years. Mrs. Santos had lived next door to them when he was just a kid. Trey recalled she used to watch them from time to time. She had moved away years ago and both he and Ryan were surprised to see her at the service. She had explained she had seen the announcement in the paper and wanted to pay her respects before enveloping both him and Ryan in a hug. It had been weird yet comforting and he had hugged her back for releasing her.
None of Trey’s old friends from the neighborhood showed up, and Trey found himself relieved.
After a short viewing, a minister had arrived and delivered the funeral sermon. And then suddenly, after three days of thinking and stressing about the funeral, it was just over. Watching as their mother’s body was led away to the crematorium, Trey was left feeling as though he had dreamt the whole thing.
Leaving the church he felt confused, bewildered and off-balance. Ryan, who had been silent for most of the service except to deliver the eulogy, looked just as worn out as Trey felt. His brother’s eyes were red-rimmed, and his face strained, and Trey frowned before directing his gaze to Seth. Seth had been uncharacteristically quiet the whole morning, had been uncharacteristically quiet since Trey had found out his mother had died really, and Trey silently watched as Seth went to talk to Ryan who was standing a few feet away.
Exhausted and hungry he forced himself to be polite as he thanked Theresa and her family for attending as well as Mrs. Santos. His head was pounding again, and he wanted nothing more than to go back to the Cohen mansion and lie down.
Finally, after what felt like an eternity, but in reality was only a few minutes, his wish came true and he gratefully followed the Cohens and Ryan to the waiting car. Sinking down into the plush leather seats, he leaned his head back and closed his eyes.
***
He’d been dreaming of ashes and fire when something hard fell on his head, jolting him awake. Rubbing at his forehead, Trey searched around in the dark, his hand stilling when it came into contact with hard plastic. There was just a hint of light from a street lamp across the street bleeding through the gaps in the blinds, and Trey raised the object to his face for a better look.
Captain Oats.
He remembered when he first laid eyes on him. He’d been peaking out from under Seth’s pillow and he’d been both baffled and amused that someone Seth’s age would still be playing with a toy horse. He remembered thinking it was freakin’ weird but also kind of endearing. Captain Oats was still a permanent fixture in Seth’s life. Seth kept him in their bedroom back in their apartment. And while Trey would never admit it, he’d gotten used to having him around.
Seth must have snuck him into the room while he was sleeping and propped him up on the storage headboard. He figured he had probably shifted in his sleep and knocked him down. Still holding Captain Oats, Trey let his mind drift back to the day’s events.
After coming home from the funeral, Trey, Ryan and the Cohens had all grabbed something to eat. After popping some Tylenol, he had gone up to his room to change out of his suit and exhausted, he had crashed out on the bed. From the look of the moonlight peaking through the blinds, that had clearly been awhile ago.
Getting up from the bed, he went to use the bathroom. His headache was gone but looking at himself in the mirror, he could see how exhausted he looked. His expression was pinched, his face pale. Scowling, he splashed his face with cold water and closed the light as he went back to the bedroom.
“Hey,” Seth said, and Trey jumped at the sound of his voice.
Seth was sitting on the bed, Captain Oats clutched in his hands and Trey forced himself to relax.
“You scared the crap out of me,” Trey said as he approached the bed. The room was still dark but his eyes had adjusted and he had no problems making out Seth’s form.
“Sorry,” Seth said, before putting Captain Oats down.
“Where are your parents?” Trey asked as he sat down beside Seth.
“There was a benefit dinner of some kind that my mom had to go to. She was chairing it and she made my dad go along,” Seth said.
“And Ryan?” Trey asked.
“He stuck around for awhile but he went back to the pool house about an hour ago to get some sleep. The funeral exhausted him,” Seth said before trailing off.
It was the most they’d said to one another in three days.
He froze for a second when Seth covered the distance between them and kissed him. It felt good, really good, and Trey deepened the kiss as his tongue sought out the warmth of Seth’s mouth.
He had missed this. Missed Seth. Trey buried his hands in Seth’s hair as he pulled him closer. He released all his pent up anger and frustration into the kiss, his tongue sweeping the interior of Seth’s mouth. Breaking off the kiss, he leaned back and pulled Seth’s shirt over his head before removing his own.
Wordlessly, he pushed Seth back until he was lying on the mattress and proceeded to remove his pants and underwear until Seth was naked beneath him. He could hear Seth breathing in the dark, the sound loud and ragged, and he quickly rose and removed his own pants and boxers before covering Seth’s body with his own.
Seth’s body was warm and welcoming and exactly the distraction he needed to take his mind off of all the events from the past few days that had been eating him up inside. Raking his teeth along the sensitive skin of Seth’s neck, he bit down hard, drawing a hiss from Seth.
His movements were erratic, almost frantic, as he ran his hands along Seth’s body before wrapping his hand around his cock. Seth was hard, and Trey worked his hand along his length as he jerked him off roughly.
Seth’s breathing was harsh as he squirmed under him. There was precum along the tip of Seth’s cock, and Trey caught it with his thumb, before rubbing it into Seth’s skin.
“Shit,” Seth said before moaning softly. “Dude, I think you’re trying to kill me.”
Trey quieted him by shoving his tongue down his throat.
He didn’t want to talk, he just wanted to lose himself in Seth’s body and in the sensation of pleasure that was washing over him.
Breaking off the kiss, he sat up to reach for the lube and remembered he didn’t have any.
“Suitcase, front pocket,” Seth said and Trey quickly rose from the bed and pulled out the bottle of lube from the suitcase along with a condom. Walking back to the bed, he poured the lube on his hand before inserting first one finger and then a second one into Seth before adding a third. The fit was tight and Seth squirmed beneath him at the intrusion.
He worked his fingers in and out, making sure to hit Seth’s prostate as often as he could before finally withdrawing his fingers. Tearing the condom wrapper, he rolled it on before using more lube to slick up his cock. Stretching out on top of Seth he aligned himself before sinking slowly in, one agonizing inch at a time.
Seth was like a vice around him, and he tried to go slow but the sensations were too intense and about halfway through he couldn’t take it anymore and thrust the rest of the way in.
Buried as deeply as he could go inside of Seth, Trey withdrew almost completely before sliding back in. Shifting, he hooked his arms beneath Seth’s thighs and tilted his hips so that his cock bumped against Seth’s prostate making Seth cry out in pleasure.
Balls deep inside of Seth, Trey willed himself to forget his mother, his father and everything else that had been bothering him over the past few days. His breathing ragged, he slammed into Seth before withdrawing, frantically thrusting and kissing and biting, as he lost himself in the sensations washing over him.
Worming a hand between their bodies, he palmed Seth’s erection, the flesh firm and hot in his hand and he jerked him off before flicking his wrist just so around the head. Feeling Seth explode between them, his body clenching around his cock, Trey's body lost its rhythm as he came. He continued to thrust erratically, once, twice, three times before finally stilling on top of Seth.
Withdrawing, he removed the condom before rolling onto his back. He was still shaking, and he forced himself to relax. Despite just having sex, he felt inexplicably strung out and antsy and he frowned before getting up and reaching for the nearest pair of boxers.
“Where are you going?” Seth asked, his voice filled with confusion as he sat up in bed.
“I don’t know. A walk,” Trey said as he put on his pants and reached for his shirt.
“Now?” Seth asked as he got up from the bed. “Dude, what’s wrong? Talk to me,” he insisted, tugging on his own pants when Trey ignored him.
Trey felt anger well up inside of him. Anger at his father, his mother, Ryan, and anger at himself. Anger at Seth too and he didn’t even understand why.
He wanted to punch something, punch someone, and he clenched his jaw, his teeth grinding together as he pushed past Seth.
“Dude, you don’t get to do that,” Seth said angrily as he stepped in front of him.
“Get out of my way,” Trey said, his voice like steel.
“No,” Seth said defiantly and Trey willed himself to remain calm.
“Seth, move out of my way or I will make you move,” he said quietly.
“No, you don’t get to fuckin’ do this,” Seth said, his voice rising. “You don’t get to ignore me for three days, and then fuck me and storm off. Talk to me, dude. Tell me what’s going on, tell me why you’re so pissed at me,” Seth said and something inside of Trey just snapped.
“What the fuck do you want me to say, Seth?”
“I want you to talk to me. Why can’t do just do that,” Seth said, frustration marring his voice.
“Because I don’t fuckin’ know what to say,” Trey shouted. “I don’t talk about everything I’m feeling all the fuckin’ time like you do. I’m not good with words, you know that.”
“Yeah, I know and usually that’s fine because I don’t need words from you! Because you show me through actions what you’re thinking. You’ll give me a look or a smile or a touch and I’ll get exactly what you’re trying to tell me. But you’re not giving me anything now Trey. You haven’t for three days and I don’t know what to do or say around you,” Seth said.
“Because I don’t know how I feel, Seth. Other than I’m fuckin’ pissed off and I want to rip this whole room apart with my bare hands,” Trey said loudly.
“Your mom died, Trey. And you’ve barely reacted. You haven’t cried, you haven’t spoken to anyone about how you’re doing or what you’re feeling. You’re barely dealing and it’s breaking my heart because I want to help you. I want to be there for you, but you keep pushing everyone away. Me, my parents, even Ryan,” Seth continued softly. “Dude, let me help you.”
“I don’t want to cry,” Trey said, forcing himself to lower his voice.
“Why? Is it some kind of Atwood thing? Because even Ryan has cried,” Seth asked, genuinely confused.
Trey took a deep breath before putting some space between him and Seth.
“I don’t fuckin’ understand,” Trey said finally, breaking the silence that had descended upon them. “I don’t understand how one minute my mom’s alive and the next minute, in a fuckin’ heartbeat, everything’s changed. And it pisses me off because it’s so stupid. God, how many times do people drink and drive and nothing ever happens to them? Do you know how many times I would drive drunk, and I always walked away without a scratch. So why didn’t she?” Trey asked, his voice wavering slightly.
“I don’t know,” Seth said gently before coming to stand next to him.
“I’m mad at her. I’m mad at her for drinking, I’m mad at her for driving. And I’m mad at her for dying. And I’m mad at her for a million other reasons. For not being around when I needed her half the time I was growing up, for dating one abusive asshole after another and bringing them into our lives, for never coming to visit me when I was up in Chino,” Trey said before trailing off. He felt Seth watching him and he looked away.
“Trey--” Seth started to say but Trey cut him off.
“I don’t want to cry for that person, Seth. She doesn’t deserve my tears,” Trey said coolly before fixing his eyes in Seth’s direction.
“Then don’t,” Seth said, surprising Trey. “Don’t cry for that person. Cry for the person she was before she started drinking. Dude, your mother might not have been perfect, but she tried. At least in the beginning. So cry for the person who would take you and Ryan to the movies whenever she could afford to even though you guys didn’t have much money. Cry for the person who would put Ryan to bed early on weekends when he a kid and would let you stay up to watch TV while drinking hot chocolate spiked with Kahlua… which is extremely minty by the way,” Seth said before trailing off.
Trey stared at Seth, wondering how he knew those things before realizing that Ryan must have told him. “I--” he began but Seth cut him off.
“And if that doesn’t work then cry for the mother you always wanted but she could never be because of the shitty circumstances you guys were dealt in life.”
Something broke inside of Trey at Seth’s words. There was a lump forming in his throat, and he tried to swallow around it. Frozen, he didn’t move when Seth closed the distance between them. His body stiff, he allowed Seth to draw him into a hug. Seth’s arms were tight around him, and he wasn’t even aware he was crying until Seth’s hands wiped the tears caught in his lashes. Burying his face in the crook of Seth’s neck, he huffed against the warm skin there, his body shaking with tension and grief.
He wasn’t sure how long they stayed like that, pressed together, with only the sound of his uneven breathing filling the silence between them.
Author: Jewel21
Rating: Hard R for sexual situations
Show: The O.C.
Genre: Angst/Slash
Pairing: Seth/Trey
Type: WIP
Summary: An unforeseeable event sends Trey and Seth back to Orange County.
A/N: This story contains slash. If you are offended by such pairings, please don't read. This story also follows after my series ‘Guilty Pleasures.’ I would suggest reading that first to better understand this story. That fic is as follows: Guilty Pleasures, Seth Knows, Stolen Moments, Risky Games, Confrontations and The Commencement
Special thanks goes out to my betas, scarlet and black_london.
Oh, and reviews are very much appreciated. Seriously, they are like crack to me. Please don’t deny me my fix ;)
________________________________________________________________________
Disclaimer: I don't own The OC. It belongs to a bunch of people I don't know and Fox.
Chapter 4
Trey woke up to the sound of Seth’s voice in his ear. Disoriented, he tried to blink the sleep from his eyes, before slowly sitting up. Seth was dressed in a suit, minus the tie and jacket, and it took him a second to remember that today was his mother’s funeral, the knowledge making his stomach sink.
“Hey,” Seth said quietly, avoiding eye contact as he played nervously with the edge of the comforter.
“Hi,” Trey said before lapsing into silence. He made a move to get out of bed but Seth didn’t get up from his spot and Trey leaned back against the headboard instead.
“I didn’t see you last night,” Seth said finally.
“Yeah, I had a headache and went to bed. I woke up around 9:00 PM but I didn’t see you around,” Trey said as he raked a hand through his hair.
“I was with Ryan. He told me about what happened with your dad. I’m sorry he was such a dick,” Seth said.
“Thanks,” Trey said, feeling uncomfortable.
Silenced settled around them and he watched as Seth rose from the bed. Seth looked worried and uncertain and Trey tracked him with his eyes as Seth went to the closet and started to pull out the clothes he would need to wear for the service.
“We need to leave in about forty minutes, so you should eat something and get dressed so we won’t be late,” Seth continued as he went to the dresser and started to pull out boxer shorts and socks.
He’d been together with Seth long enough to recognize when Seth was concerned, nervous, or had something weighing heavily on his mind that he wanted to discuss but didn’t know how to broach the subject. More than once he’d come home from work to find Seth uncharacteristically cleaning, folding laundry, or puttering around the apartment and only after he would grab Seth by the shoulders and sit him down and ask him what was wrong would Seth finally tell him what was bothering him.
Rising from the bed, Trey came to a stop next to Seth and wrapped his hand around Seth’s wrist, stilling his movements.
“Seth--” he started to say but was interrupted by a knock on the door. Sandy’s head poking through the door made him release Seth’s wrist and he grabbed the socks and boxers than Seth was still holding in his hand.
“Good, you’re awake. We’re going to be leaving soon,” Sandy said before turning his attention on his son. “And you, your mother is looking for you,” Sandy continued and Seth nodded before walking out the door.
“So how are you doing with everything?” Sandy asked once Seth had left.
“Fine, sir,” Trey said automatically.
“It’s going to be a long day, and it’s going to probably take you awhile to process everything that’s happened. But, if you need to talk Kirsten and I would be more than happy to listen,” Sandy said.
It felt weird talking with Sandy. And not just because he was doing his son. He’d always had issues with parental units, never truly felt comfortable around them. Not his parents and certainly not his friends’ parents. It felt even weirder being around Kirsten and Sandy. They were like the perfect happy couples you saw on TV that Trey had always suspected didn’t truly exist. Until he met the Cohens anyway.
Being around Kirsten and Sandy just reminded him of how different they were from his own family and he couldn’t help feeling inferior around them, even though he knew that was never their intention.
“I appreciate that,” he said, trying hard not to fidget. “Thank you,” he added as an afterthought.
“You’re welcome,” Sandy said. He stared at him for a few seconds, as though he wanted to say something more, but then he turned to leave. “We’ll be downstairs when you’re ready.”
Only after Sandy shut the door did Trey finally move from his spot.
***
The service was small and intimate. The funeral was held in a small church with stained glass windows. There were a few flower wreaths by the coffin, one from the Cohens, one from him and Ryan and surprisingly enough one from their father. Both he and Ryan had paused when they’d noticed their father’s name on the banner draped around the floral arrangement, along with his and Ryan’s names. It had annoyed him that his father would not only have the nerve to send flowers after their visit with him, but that he would also have the nerve to include both his sons’ names. He wanted the flowers removed, but then he remembered the look of grief and shock on his father’s face when he’d told him the news, before he had started ranting and trying to lay blame. Conflicted, he stared silently at the wreath as feelings of guilt and anger warred inside of him before eventually tearing his eyes away.
The smell of the flowers in the small room made him nauseous and he felt the beginning of another headache tapping at the base of his skull whenever he even looked at his mother’s coffin. He’d been expecting no one to show up at the funeral and was surprised that in addition to the Cohens, Teresa had shown up along with her family. As well as an old neighbor of theirs back in Chino they hadn’t seen in years. Mrs. Santos had lived next door to them when he was just a kid. Trey recalled she used to watch them from time to time. She had moved away years ago and both he and Ryan were surprised to see her at the service. She had explained she had seen the announcement in the paper and wanted to pay her respects before enveloping both him and Ryan in a hug. It had been weird yet comforting and he had hugged her back for releasing her.
None of Trey’s old friends from the neighborhood showed up, and Trey found himself relieved.
After a short viewing, a minister had arrived and delivered the funeral sermon. And then suddenly, after three days of thinking and stressing about the funeral, it was just over. Watching as their mother’s body was led away to the crematorium, Trey was left feeling as though he had dreamt the whole thing.
Leaving the church he felt confused, bewildered and off-balance. Ryan, who had been silent for most of the service except to deliver the eulogy, looked just as worn out as Trey felt. His brother’s eyes were red-rimmed, and his face strained, and Trey frowned before directing his gaze to Seth. Seth had been uncharacteristically quiet the whole morning, had been uncharacteristically quiet since Trey had found out his mother had died really, and Trey silently watched as Seth went to talk to Ryan who was standing a few feet away.
Exhausted and hungry he forced himself to be polite as he thanked Theresa and her family for attending as well as Mrs. Santos. His head was pounding again, and he wanted nothing more than to go back to the Cohen mansion and lie down.
Finally, after what felt like an eternity, but in reality was only a few minutes, his wish came true and he gratefully followed the Cohens and Ryan to the waiting car. Sinking down into the plush leather seats, he leaned his head back and closed his eyes.
***
He’d been dreaming of ashes and fire when something hard fell on his head, jolting him awake. Rubbing at his forehead, Trey searched around in the dark, his hand stilling when it came into contact with hard plastic. There was just a hint of light from a street lamp across the street bleeding through the gaps in the blinds, and Trey raised the object to his face for a better look.
Captain Oats.
He remembered when he first laid eyes on him. He’d been peaking out from under Seth’s pillow and he’d been both baffled and amused that someone Seth’s age would still be playing with a toy horse. He remembered thinking it was freakin’ weird but also kind of endearing. Captain Oats was still a permanent fixture in Seth’s life. Seth kept him in their bedroom back in their apartment. And while Trey would never admit it, he’d gotten used to having him around.
Seth must have snuck him into the room while he was sleeping and propped him up on the storage headboard. He figured he had probably shifted in his sleep and knocked him down. Still holding Captain Oats, Trey let his mind drift back to the day’s events.
After coming home from the funeral, Trey, Ryan and the Cohens had all grabbed something to eat. After popping some Tylenol, he had gone up to his room to change out of his suit and exhausted, he had crashed out on the bed. From the look of the moonlight peaking through the blinds, that had clearly been awhile ago.
Getting up from the bed, he went to use the bathroom. His headache was gone but looking at himself in the mirror, he could see how exhausted he looked. His expression was pinched, his face pale. Scowling, he splashed his face with cold water and closed the light as he went back to the bedroom.
“Hey,” Seth said, and Trey jumped at the sound of his voice.
Seth was sitting on the bed, Captain Oats clutched in his hands and Trey forced himself to relax.
“You scared the crap out of me,” Trey said as he approached the bed. The room was still dark but his eyes had adjusted and he had no problems making out Seth’s form.
“Sorry,” Seth said, before putting Captain Oats down.
“Where are your parents?” Trey asked as he sat down beside Seth.
“There was a benefit dinner of some kind that my mom had to go to. She was chairing it and she made my dad go along,” Seth said.
“And Ryan?” Trey asked.
“He stuck around for awhile but he went back to the pool house about an hour ago to get some sleep. The funeral exhausted him,” Seth said before trailing off.
It was the most they’d said to one another in three days.
He froze for a second when Seth covered the distance between them and kissed him. It felt good, really good, and Trey deepened the kiss as his tongue sought out the warmth of Seth’s mouth.
He had missed this. Missed Seth. Trey buried his hands in Seth’s hair as he pulled him closer. He released all his pent up anger and frustration into the kiss, his tongue sweeping the interior of Seth’s mouth. Breaking off the kiss, he leaned back and pulled Seth’s shirt over his head before removing his own.
Wordlessly, he pushed Seth back until he was lying on the mattress and proceeded to remove his pants and underwear until Seth was naked beneath him. He could hear Seth breathing in the dark, the sound loud and ragged, and he quickly rose and removed his own pants and boxers before covering Seth’s body with his own.
Seth’s body was warm and welcoming and exactly the distraction he needed to take his mind off of all the events from the past few days that had been eating him up inside. Raking his teeth along the sensitive skin of Seth’s neck, he bit down hard, drawing a hiss from Seth.
His movements were erratic, almost frantic, as he ran his hands along Seth’s body before wrapping his hand around his cock. Seth was hard, and Trey worked his hand along his length as he jerked him off roughly.
Seth’s breathing was harsh as he squirmed under him. There was precum along the tip of Seth’s cock, and Trey caught it with his thumb, before rubbing it into Seth’s skin.
“Shit,” Seth said before moaning softly. “Dude, I think you’re trying to kill me.”
Trey quieted him by shoving his tongue down his throat.
He didn’t want to talk, he just wanted to lose himself in Seth’s body and in the sensation of pleasure that was washing over him.
Breaking off the kiss, he sat up to reach for the lube and remembered he didn’t have any.
“Suitcase, front pocket,” Seth said and Trey quickly rose from the bed and pulled out the bottle of lube from the suitcase along with a condom. Walking back to the bed, he poured the lube on his hand before inserting first one finger and then a second one into Seth before adding a third. The fit was tight and Seth squirmed beneath him at the intrusion.
He worked his fingers in and out, making sure to hit Seth’s prostate as often as he could before finally withdrawing his fingers. Tearing the condom wrapper, he rolled it on before using more lube to slick up his cock. Stretching out on top of Seth he aligned himself before sinking slowly in, one agonizing inch at a time.
Seth was like a vice around him, and he tried to go slow but the sensations were too intense and about halfway through he couldn’t take it anymore and thrust the rest of the way in.
Buried as deeply as he could go inside of Seth, Trey withdrew almost completely before sliding back in. Shifting, he hooked his arms beneath Seth’s thighs and tilted his hips so that his cock bumped against Seth’s prostate making Seth cry out in pleasure.
Balls deep inside of Seth, Trey willed himself to forget his mother, his father and everything else that had been bothering him over the past few days. His breathing ragged, he slammed into Seth before withdrawing, frantically thrusting and kissing and biting, as he lost himself in the sensations washing over him.
Worming a hand between their bodies, he palmed Seth’s erection, the flesh firm and hot in his hand and he jerked him off before flicking his wrist just so around the head. Feeling Seth explode between them, his body clenching around his cock, Trey's body lost its rhythm as he came. He continued to thrust erratically, once, twice, three times before finally stilling on top of Seth.
Withdrawing, he removed the condom before rolling onto his back. He was still shaking, and he forced himself to relax. Despite just having sex, he felt inexplicably strung out and antsy and he frowned before getting up and reaching for the nearest pair of boxers.
“Where are you going?” Seth asked, his voice filled with confusion as he sat up in bed.
“I don’t know. A walk,” Trey said as he put on his pants and reached for his shirt.
“Now?” Seth asked as he got up from the bed. “Dude, what’s wrong? Talk to me,” he insisted, tugging on his own pants when Trey ignored him.
Trey felt anger well up inside of him. Anger at his father, his mother, Ryan, and anger at himself. Anger at Seth too and he didn’t even understand why.
He wanted to punch something, punch someone, and he clenched his jaw, his teeth grinding together as he pushed past Seth.
“Dude, you don’t get to do that,” Seth said angrily as he stepped in front of him.
“Get out of my way,” Trey said, his voice like steel.
“No,” Seth said defiantly and Trey willed himself to remain calm.
“Seth, move out of my way or I will make you move,” he said quietly.
“No, you don’t get to fuckin’ do this,” Seth said, his voice rising. “You don’t get to ignore me for three days, and then fuck me and storm off. Talk to me, dude. Tell me what’s going on, tell me why you’re so pissed at me,” Seth said and something inside of Trey just snapped.
“What the fuck do you want me to say, Seth?”
“I want you to talk to me. Why can’t do just do that,” Seth said, frustration marring his voice.
“Because I don’t fuckin’ know what to say,” Trey shouted. “I don’t talk about everything I’m feeling all the fuckin’ time like you do. I’m not good with words, you know that.”
“Yeah, I know and usually that’s fine because I don’t need words from you! Because you show me through actions what you’re thinking. You’ll give me a look or a smile or a touch and I’ll get exactly what you’re trying to tell me. But you’re not giving me anything now Trey. You haven’t for three days and I don’t know what to do or say around you,” Seth said.
“Because I don’t know how I feel, Seth. Other than I’m fuckin’ pissed off and I want to rip this whole room apart with my bare hands,” Trey said loudly.
“Your mom died, Trey. And you’ve barely reacted. You haven’t cried, you haven’t spoken to anyone about how you’re doing or what you’re feeling. You’re barely dealing and it’s breaking my heart because I want to help you. I want to be there for you, but you keep pushing everyone away. Me, my parents, even Ryan,” Seth continued softly. “Dude, let me help you.”
“I don’t want to cry,” Trey said, forcing himself to lower his voice.
“Why? Is it some kind of Atwood thing? Because even Ryan has cried,” Seth asked, genuinely confused.
Trey took a deep breath before putting some space between him and Seth.
“I don’t fuckin’ understand,” Trey said finally, breaking the silence that had descended upon them. “I don’t understand how one minute my mom’s alive and the next minute, in a fuckin’ heartbeat, everything’s changed. And it pisses me off because it’s so stupid. God, how many times do people drink and drive and nothing ever happens to them? Do you know how many times I would drive drunk, and I always walked away without a scratch. So why didn’t she?” Trey asked, his voice wavering slightly.
“I don’t know,” Seth said gently before coming to stand next to him.
“I’m mad at her. I’m mad at her for drinking, I’m mad at her for driving. And I’m mad at her for dying. And I’m mad at her for a million other reasons. For not being around when I needed her half the time I was growing up, for dating one abusive asshole after another and bringing them into our lives, for never coming to visit me when I was up in Chino,” Trey said before trailing off. He felt Seth watching him and he looked away.
“Trey--” Seth started to say but Trey cut him off.
“I don’t want to cry for that person, Seth. She doesn’t deserve my tears,” Trey said coolly before fixing his eyes in Seth’s direction.
“Then don’t,” Seth said, surprising Trey. “Don’t cry for that person. Cry for the person she was before she started drinking. Dude, your mother might not have been perfect, but she tried. At least in the beginning. So cry for the person who would take you and Ryan to the movies whenever she could afford to even though you guys didn’t have much money. Cry for the person who would put Ryan to bed early on weekends when he a kid and would let you stay up to watch TV while drinking hot chocolate spiked with Kahlua… which is extremely minty by the way,” Seth said before trailing off.
Trey stared at Seth, wondering how he knew those things before realizing that Ryan must have told him. “I--” he began but Seth cut him off.
“And if that doesn’t work then cry for the mother you always wanted but she could never be because of the shitty circumstances you guys were dealt in life.”
Something broke inside of Trey at Seth’s words. There was a lump forming in his throat, and he tried to swallow around it. Frozen, he didn’t move when Seth closed the distance between them. His body stiff, he allowed Seth to draw him into a hug. Seth’s arms were tight around him, and he wasn’t even aware he was crying until Seth’s hands wiped the tears caught in his lashes. Burying his face in the crook of Seth’s neck, he huffed against the warm skin there, his body shaking with tension and grief.
He wasn’t sure how long they stayed like that, pressed together, with only the sound of his uneven breathing filling the silence between them.